Will he come back to me

What do you mean? How would you feel? You're a woman you're going to feel differently.

Trust me he's feeling guilty. I know he is

You have little ability to separate fact from your fantasies. Do everyone a favor and work on yourself before you try to do a relationship again.

It feels passive-aggressive and bitchy.

I'd think I was well rid of you.

________

Re-read what ragman wrote about his reaction to your email. He's nailed it.

women and men don't have assigned responses

Well if he takes it like that then that's fair enough. I've never been bitchy in my life, I'm allowed to be once

You're allowed to be bitchy once in a while - just don't think it will make anyone else feel guilty.

test

Why is it a fantasy because I know he's feeling guilty? I think that's cruel saying 'do everyone a favour' ..... I'm not a horrible person or even acted horribly, I'll admit sending that email may not be everyone's personal idea, in an hour I may well agree with you. But some times when your hurt you lash out

I don't think it will make anyone else feel guilty. if it does then great .... 2 stones or whatever that saying is.

No I know you're right. I always put myself down and I spose it's a habit I can't help. Thankyou

I'll remind you that the opposite of love is indifference...not hate or resentment or trying to make him feel guilty. In order to move on you will need to work towards feeling indifferent about any and all of his activities.

Sending him that letter with that sort of manipulation behind it...might feel good in the moment..but you have no idea about how he'll interpret it. Remember you asked our advice as to what to say in the letter and whether or not to send it. Then you added that comment ...but admitted it was manipulative to make him feel guilty.

You need to let go and allow yourself to not care what's in his mind or in his future. This will take more time. It's no small task - feeling indifferent about him.

I've heard of indifference, hope I'm there one day.

I'd like him to feel guilty, that's mean I know. And I know I probably shouldn't of sent that email, I'm not gaining anything. And yes I am a mean person for sending it and wanting him to feel guilty, I should have rose above him. But despite that I still want nothing but happiness for him, he handled the end badly but he's still a good person and deserves that.

Time to focus on work, hobbies, friends and family, and take time

It's not a matter of being mean. It's normal to lash out and all but it won't get you where you need to be. Not about meanness as much as there's a need to do things that are productive for you, while maintaining your self-esteem and perhaps maintaining dignity. Being indifferent towards his actions...gives you distance...which admittedly is at an early stage. This relationship has been like addiction. Now you have to get over the addiction.



That's part of the brainwashing. You're blocking feelings. You're convincing yourself that you want the best for him...because that's what you think you should believe. You're miserable right now and heartbroken over the loss. Thinking of his happiness should not be the case for you because right now you should be resentful. At some point you can be indifferent. But first step is to get over this false front of altruism,. He'll live his life as he lives it. And how he treats people (his karma) will determine whether or not he's happy.

All that should be of no concern to you. He abused you.

Dear Zoe,
The same feeling to you!!!I met a boy,he was so kind to me.He spent the spare time on staying with me.I reckon that we will go to marriage.
I could fully understand your feeling.So painful.You do not know why he broke up with you without any acceptable reasons.
Do not think about it.Let him go.
You should move on and concentrate on working,studying,etc.
Believe you could meet your Mr.right in the future.
Give some time to yourself,you will be OK.
Trust me,lovely girl!!!
Do not contact with him anymore.