Help - I've asked her out but too soon - where to from here

Maybe she's not interested in dating someone she works with. What if it doesn't work out? Then you two have got to look at each other afterwards. Not pleasant.

Mon Dieux! Elle est francais! Give it a few weeks then ask her out again. Play it cool. Learn French. Say some romantic things in French. Gals love that.

did you follow up with another idea after she told you that she had seen the exhibit? Girls loved to be woooed

If she hasn't given you a definate no than I think that you are still in the running and she might be interested.

I think that the key is acting interested but not acting like your life will end if she doesn't go out with you. Flirt with her and continue to be interested but don't be desperate. That's what turns the girls off.

Give her a single rose--and a large smile--with no strings attached.

Those are all good suggestions, but I second eoe's concern about dating a co-worker. Having done it once or twice in the past, I know how tricky that can be!

Instead of asking her out off the bat, just chat with her for a few minutes, than ask her for her phone number...she'll either give it to you or she won't..that'll tell you if she's got any interest at all. Say something like "hey, I gotta run, but I'd like to talk to you again soon...can I give you a call sometime?"

Alot of times, someone ends up either quitting or getting fired.

By the way, you really shot yourself in the foot with that dumb pickup line...save those for when you can do it to make her laugh, not drop her head.

(also, "your parents must be retarded...because you're special" is a much better line)

I have 2 jobs and chances are that I won't work there anyway cause of a better offer that just lined up. As I said we don'r really work together that often at all and that IS the problem as well as a good thing.

Problem cause we don't get to talk to each other enough to find out more about each other - yet going out to me seems as though not that she is not interested but unsure and does not want to rush things.

Having said that at the speed that things are going at the moment I don't know how long I can keep going. We are very very slowly getting to know each other -

If I turn up to work when she is working and I am not - just to see her and talk to her that would be too pushy ??

After asking her to go to a museum I tried to carry on a normal conversation and so did she - she kept her smile and all but quickly I run out of what to talk about.

My question is - I am not sure if a rose is appropriate at this stage or not - is that gonna make me look desparate?

I am not sure I know the fine line between showing that I am interested and going over that and being desparate.

Absolutely, definitely, do NOT bring her a rose.

Step 1: Get her number.

I have her number we all have a phone lists at work and know each others numbers

Well you obviously don't want to call her out of the blue...you'll look like a stalker.

Let me rephrase so you understand: Ask her if it's ok for you to call her, outside work.

Don't bring her flowers, presents, ect...you'll look like a chump, and she'll instantly shoot you down. She's already turned down a date request, so you don't want to push it. Keep it casual, and don't make it obvious HOW much you like her.

Take it from Slappy. He's been married 7 times.

What? I've never died before!

Fake an injury.

I am telling you, this always works, especially with foreign women.

Is there heavy machinery at work, could you pretend to get trapped under something, or your arm wedged in some kind of fan belt?

Big sympathy points, I tell you.

Seriously...
Dude, I know exactly where you're coming from. I was looking for that long term relationship that consisted of true love and marriage. I found what I was looking for only a few months ago and I want to relay a little of that to you in the hopes that it will help.

First off, we hit it off instantly. I don't know how much that has to do with things, but I think it had a lot because we both left the first date with the biggest natural high. The strange part is, even today we don't talk on the phone well. I've met chicks who I could talk on the phone for hours with, but had no attraction to romantically. So, what I'm saying is all is not lost if you aren't communicating well just yet. Although it helps. You must be fairly confident to ask her out multiple times, otherwise I'd preach on appearing confident. But it also helps to look like you don't care a great deal, or rather, that you aren't basing your whole existence on whether she says yes. But you probably got all that down. If she's shying away but not saying no, I think there's still some reciprocal interest there. Most women are used to guys approaching them, that's how it is. So if she weren't interested, most likely she'd just say so and allow you to get on with your life. Here's a thought, look into typical mating rituals/practices in france. It could be she's expecting a totally different approach and is somewhat dumbfounded by your methods. Oh, and I must say that women might find a standard pickup line cute, but if it sounds like it's something you didn't think up yourself, it won't win you any points. This is especially important when you're talking about something they might take seriously, i.e. Love at first sight which I know for a fact can and does happen. I would try to get her email address or phone number. Email works better because she's not obligated to talk to you at a certain time, and it's a little less personal. Then just start a conversation with her online. That will allow her to be herself and open up and get to know you all at once. Once she knows you, you can then make arrangements for lunch. Lunch is great because usually you have somewhere to go afterward that is perfect for an out and to keep things from going on too long. It'll give her a taste of who you are, but not too much that she is sick of you already.

Hope some of this helps, and good luck.

Thanks everyone - here is the latest info and question.

We both worked an early shift this morning and there are only 3 of us who work early (me her and another guy she does not like and he is her and my boss)

She got rung up (by her boss) cause she was late for work. When she came to work she said she slept through the alarm.

Now - she had these very nice earings on and I did not say anything about them (did not want to be desparate) and about 1 hour later she took them off. She never wears earings normally.

I was talking to her normally and all..

Was that a small sign that she likes me???

Did she try and send the message to me with it?

Have the tables turned - have I left her wondering why I have NOT said anything like (you look nice or something) ????????????

I am not scared to ask her out again Roctupus but i want to make sure that that is not going to make me look desparate. I'll wait a bit more before I ask her again and definitely like a lunch etc...

Any comments suggestions anybody PLEASE reply.
Thanks

When a girl removes her earings it's a definite sign that she wants to rip off all her clothes and jump into bed with you right at that moment. Sorry Giant. The time was right and you missed it.

Ask her to lunch. Maybe she'll take the earings off again.

giant,

1 - if you thought her earrings looked pretty...its perfectly ok to say so...girls like compliments, and its not a chump thing to do, girls dont see those kinds of compliments as anything more than casual.

2 - you need to stop trying to be cheesy, and stop trying to overanalyze...you need to just be genuine with her...dont pretend to like things you dont like, dont pretend to be too much cooler than you really feel...dont try to decieve her into liking you, just smile and make yourself fun to be around.

3 - do not use work as an excuse to ask her out. if you do this, then you'll find yourself planning out sneaky little ways to bump into her...and asking her at awkward times when shes unprepared...its just no good. you need to get her number like slappy said. then you need to talk to her on the phone, see if you can get a good conversation going...if things seem to be going well then you can ask her out.

4 - that original pick up line you said is going to loom over you until you can make her forget about it by acting really fun to be around...shes going to think you are a horny loser until you convince her oherwise

5 - you say you havent talked to her much...why do you even want to be with her so badly? most likey, this girl is not the girl for you...i say this for a number of reasons. one, because she does not make you feel comfortable around her...im not an extremely social guy either, but usually girls sharing similar interests or perspectives are really easy to open up to. the other reason i say this is because you have thrown her lines, and she didnt bite. im thinking she just has a cute face, and you are desperate for love