I'm losing her please help me

Forums: Relationships, Ex, Lonely, Need Help, Getting Back Together
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I recently went through my break up with my girlfriend of two months but I believe it should be longer. It was a really good relationship that didn't go bad until the final weekend where she said " I myself changed and she lost her feelings for me." While we were dating she was the one who said she loved me first and was hinting it for quite some time. Well at first she wanted a week to herself but after the week she did end it. We ended on good terms and she said she would be open minded on liking me. We ended up getting in an argument on my campus the next day because she was trying to make me jealous and it worked, but we apologized after it and went back to good terms. The next couple of days I just texted her as a friend, until she heard a rumor that I was talking to another girl. After I said I didn't, I called her an apologized for the bad stuff I did. She said it was fine but told me that she had already moved on. For the next couple of days I messaged her apologizing and what not but with no response. Eventually within the week she did respond and I explained why I texted so much. Then the next day she texted me telling me I did a good job at a game but that was it. Then she got mad at me for asking about her to her friends and she said she was done. But two days later I called her and she said she'll give me the chance to be her friend again but I need to give her space. So for a week and a half I left her alone until at a party I broke down and yelled and cussed at her. I apologized the next day and she just said I wasn't myself. So for another weeks I left her alone but eventually she said she forgave me and its okay. But yesterday I reached out to and she explained how she started talking to one of my friends and hung out with the day before and that she was happy.(she was talking to somebody for about a month before I first one her heart)She said that he proved himself before I did and I didn't once try to prove myself to her. She said she does miss hanging out with my little sister and wants to see her again, but once again that she'll give me the chance to be her friend again. What do I do next? because she is the most stubborn girl I have ever met and I keep doing everything wrong.

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Type: Question • Score: 4 • Views: 3,106 • Replies: 35

@OGmike12,

I should also say we've been friends for about 6 years. She told me at one point she was thinking of getting back with me and that I'm not myself right now.

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@OGmike12,

She's playing you like a cheap violin.

Why would you want to be with someone who treats you with so little respect?

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@OGmike12,

I kept reading a reoccurring theme. Why haven't you picked up on it? The secret word is apologized. This is a terrible word to use in any of it's tenses. Some people think it is great, but it isn't. The fact that you used it so much within (what a month peroid) is WAY too much. It proves a couple of things. You are overly irrational and make decisions without even thinking them through. Do you actually think things would improve if you actually had a relationship with her?

This is obviously not a natural connection. You are attempting to swim up stream in a hurricane with a whirlpool underneath you. This is one fish you are not meant to catch. Maybe you might want to realize this before you make yourself or her any more miserable?

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@OGmike12,

sorrybman but she is just not for you...shes messing with your emotions just so she can get a reaction outa you.as a girl myself i understand these things shes doin.shes just pullin at your heartstrings. the sooner you realize it the better it will be for you.

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@OGmike12,

Her emotions seem fickle, and your sense of self / self esteem seem underdeveloped. It doesn't seem that either of you are good for the other. Leave well enough alone. Move on.

1 Reply

@vikorr,

This thread is over 4 years old

2 Replies

@chai2,

yes it may be...but for those who are going through the exact same situation they can have these little pieces of advice that may be needed in life

1 Reply

@chai2,

Ah well, I sometimes forget to look at the dates Smile

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@kaylie-the-cutter,

kaylie-the-cutter wrote:

yes it may be...but for those who are going through the exact same situation they can have these little pieces of advice that may be needed in life

I was addressing that, as you can see, to commit.

It’s common enough that a rando like you shows up, finds some old thread, and comments on it. You weren’t writing as if you were offering general advice. You were directly addressing someone who made one post. I’m always curious how someone comes on here and manages to dredge up things that are a couple/few years old, or even things more than 10 years old. I would think that takes quite a bit of effort considering the thousands of relationship threads started here over time. How does that even work?

Sometimes though a regular, like vikkor (and I’ve done it myself) neglects to look at the date, and doesn’t realize it’s a long dead thread.

Yeah I agree vikkor, sometimes one forgets to look at the dates.

2 Replies

@chai2,

They probably do it the way I first found my way here, they google a phrase of interest to them and an old thread on A2K pops up.

For me it was the term "white bread," that I heard on the Simpsons. Apu described Ned Flanders as "so white bread," and I'd never heard it used in that context.

At first I thought it was an American version of brown bread, rhyming slang meaning dead, but I found it hard to believe Apu would want to kill Flanders.

So I googled it, and an old thread on A2K was the only thing that popped up that was at all relevant.

1 Reply

@izzythepush,

thx for the backup friend

1 Reply

@chai2,

Maybe she is bored and lonely. Maybe she is trying to be helpful. Maybe she is exercising her right to express herself. Maybe she doesn't need someone calling her names like "rando", which implies that anyone who hasn't been here for years isn't welcome. Maybe she is trying to say " Look. I came here as "Kaylie the Cutter. Now I am over that and I'm just trying to be happy." Maybe she is too nice to say "Why don't you get off my back?"

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@Ponderer,

umm...no ill tell him to get the hell off my freaking back if i want to. can you please stop making me seem as if i am to small and childish to answer to my own damn problems...i can handle things just fine without you interfearing...thanks

3 Replies

@kaylie-the-cutter,

kaylie-the-cutter wrote:

umm...no ill tell him to get the hell off my freaking back if i want to. can you please stop making me seem as if i am to small and childish to answer to my own damn problems...i can handle things just fine without you interfearing...thanks

or her either gender really....not trying to be rude @chai2

0 Replies

@Ponderer,

Ponderer wrote:

Maybe she is bored and lonely. Maybe she is trying to be helpful. Maybe she is exercising her right to express herself. Maybe she doesn't need someone calling her names like "rando", which implies that anyone who hasn't been here for years isn't welcome. Maybe she is trying to say " Look. I came here as "Kaylie the Cutter. Now I am over that and I'm just trying to be happy." Maybe she is too nice to say "Why don't you get off my back?"

maybe she is none of the things you're saying.

maybe I too have the right to express myself.

maybe I'm not to nice to say responding to a years old thread without noticing the date is not too bright.

maybe you're one of those people who are too "polite" to call others on their bullshit of giving too many maybes until it's watered down to the point it means nothing.

maybe maybe maybe. The word that's so important to those who have a mortal fear of offending in even the slightest way. Pretty chicken **** way to live life.

1 Reply

@kaylie-the-cutter,

kaylie-the-cutter wrote:

please stop making me seem as if i am to small and childish

Have you wondered why others here may think of you as small and childish, or why you jump to the conclusion that others see you that way?

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@chai2,

I just hope she pays as much attention to what you wrote to her as I paid to what you wrote to me.
(Which is absolutely none)

1 Reply

@kaylie-the-cutter,

I'm sorry if I made you feel that way. That wasn't my intent. I was telling her my own feelings about her obvious intent to cause you emotional pain.
(which is even more obvious now)

1 Reply

@Ponderer,

Ponderer wrote:

I just hope she pays as much attention to what you wrote to her as I paid to what you wrote to me.
(Which is absolutely none)

Well, "maybe" (your favorite word) you should.

0 Replies

I'm losing her please help me

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