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boy 13, girl 11 possible suggestive conduct

 
 
Tue 27 Jan, 2015 03:01 am
my 13 yr old son has his own room and we live alone. he is spending time with the 11 yr old girl next door. she has no parents and lives with her grandmother and 12 yr old brother who she takes care of and bathes because he is crippled from an accident that killed their parents. her brother is not circumcised and she knows to hold back the skin to wash it properly. she noticed that he was starting to get erections but thought it simply made it easier to wash.

now she is spending time with my son who is 13. she will come over in the evening when he is in the bath, walk right in to talk with him, and wash his back. one time she washed him all over to show him how she washes her brother. he is circumcised and he got an erection also, and she just thought it was easier to handle and washed it anyway.

they like Friday nights when she stays over. they are up late with tv and computer, and long after I am in bed, they will bathe and go to bed. she sleeps in with him as a convenience since we have no other beds and they are good friends anyway. now she has started giving him a massage at bedtime. he lays on his stomach for 1/2 hour while she does his back, then he lays on his back for 1/2 hour while she does the front. he sleeps nude but she wears panties.

they are good kids have known about sex for quite a while, but have no interest in things yet. she has made it clear to her grandmother that she will keep her virginity at least until she graduates primary school (grade 12) when she is 16. they have no interested in dating or anything like that, so I think I have a while before there is anything to worry about. I inquired if there was anything that I don't know about, I was told no, that all was well. when I asked why she brings a towel to bed, she said it was to keep her hands dry during the massage. so I believe all is well. if anyone has suggestions I could use them. but I just don't want to restrict their freedom of activity to enjoy and have fun.
 
glitterbag
 
  2  
Tue 27 Jan, 2015 03:40 am
@bobkissinger,
bob, this not healthy, even though the 11 can care for her brother. I don't know who is responsible for the 11 year old and her brother. Please call social services and ask them if they can help or offer assistance.

Do it before you become the grandfather of a baby born to an 12 & !4 year old.its unfair to the child parents, the chid born to children, and are you ready to parent a newborn to adulthood.

The 11 year old has been saddled with too much responsibility.and her brother needs a better care taker. i don't know who the Mensa member is who tasked her to bath her brother. the little girl has been given too much responsibility, but she's too young to completely understand the difference between helping her brother, and helping able bodied teens to clean their penis and other intimate
body parts. holy crap, can you imagine how dangerous it will be if a bunch of 14 year olds decide she gets turned on by cleaning her brother, there will be a line around the block with males who would enjoy a prepubescent child cleaning their manhood.
bobkissinger
 
  1  
Tue 27 Jan, 2015 04:40 am
@glitterbag,
thank you for your reply. social services would not help but would only hurt by destroying what is left of the family unit. I was the attorney representing the 12 yr old boy and his 11 yr old sister for placement before the family court, so I am familiar with the situation. she actually does an excellent job caring for her brother. on his end, the boy would rather have his sister take care of him than some stranger touching him. as far as her potential pregnancy, perhaps you did not read the part that she has already decided to keep her virginity. she is very mature for her age. so that is a non issue. most of the neighborhood kids know she cares for her brother and have great respect for her. I think sometimes we adults forget that the kids don't have all the hangups that us adults typically do. also, I don't want to read evil into the best of intentions amd/or just plain old having fun.
jespah
 
  2  
Tue 27 Jan, 2015 10:43 am
@bobkissinger,
bobkissinger wrote:

...as far as her potential pregnancy, perhaps you did not read the part that she has already decided to keep her virginity. she is very mature for her age. so that is a non issue. ...


Nope. She is nowhere near the age of consent, and neither is either boy. It is potentially neglect on the part of her parents for giving her that kind of a role in her brother's caregiving.

This is not adult hangups. It is the law. You say you are an attorney. I have a lot of trouble believing that. None of this stuff is negotiable, and you should know that.
0 Replies
 
PUNKEY
 
  3  
Tue 27 Jan, 2015 12:13 pm
Siblings have bathed each other for eons, so that's not the issue. Her role of caretaker for a handicapped sibling needs to be taken over by professionals. It could be perceived that her bathing brother might move into inappropriate contact, as both of them move into puberty. This is not a good role for her.

Get some professional help in the house, ASAP.

The real issue is that she is bringing that kind of intimate care-taking, private behavior INTO YOUR HOME and performing it on YOUR SON!

Duh-h-h? And you wonder about it?

You are giving your son the wrong message here: That girls "service" boys; that her role in life is that she should be bathing/massaging/servicing boys. This has gone into a sexual service activity, not an act of personal hygiene.

YOU must stop this behavior NOW.

YOU must not let these two adolescents carry on like this in your house.

You are an attorney? I doubt it. This borders on contributing to the unhealthy activity of children.
0 Replies
 
Butrflynet
 
  3  
Tue 27 Jan, 2015 01:29 pm
@bobkissinger,
Quote:
her brother is not circumcised and she knows to hold back the skin to wash it properly. she noticed that he was starting to get erections but thought it simply made it easier to wash.


Quote:
one time she washed him all over to show him how she washes her brother. he is circumcised and he got an erection also, and she just thought it was easier to handle and washed it anyway.


Quote:
now she has started giving him a massage at bedtime. he lays on his stomach for 1/2 hour while she does his back, then he lays on his back for 1/2 hour while she does the front. he sleeps nude but she wears panties.


I guess I am just a skeptical prude. I have to ask, what conversations are you having with your 13 year old son and the 11 year old girl next door to know such detail about the goings on at her house and in your son's bedroom?

PUNKEY
 
  5  
Tue 27 Jan, 2015 01:47 pm
Troll???!!
Olivier5
 
  1  
Tue 27 Jan, 2015 02:04 pm
Looks like teenage paradise to me... Leave them alone.
0 Replies
 
Lordyaswas
 
  4  
Tue 27 Jan, 2015 02:34 pm
@PUNKEY,
Absolutely.

Attorney my arse.
0 Replies
 
bobkissinger
 
  0  
Wed 28 Jan, 2015 02:39 am
@Butrflynet,
they speak openly to me because they trust me wherein they would not trust any other adult. I do want to guide them properly within the framework of what they wish to do, but I would never betray them as most adults would. fortunately their conduct is really quite innocent, even thou I realize that most evil minded adults would never believe that.
Lordyaswas
 
  3  
Wed 28 Jan, 2015 08:37 am
@bobkissinger,
Being evil minded has nothing to do with it, as far as believing you or not.

An Attorney who apparently lets a twelve year old girl stroll into his house and bathe and massage his thirteen year old son and mildly wonders if there is anything more to it needs a cattle prod shoved up his arse to see if his brain cell is functioning properly.

I still call total bullshite.
0 Replies
 
Olivier5
 
  1  
Wed 28 Jan, 2015 02:34 pm
Are there laws in your barbarian countries against children playing doctor?
Lordyaswas
 
  2  
Wed 28 Jan, 2015 03:05 pm
@Olivier5,
Don't be an argumentative twat just for the sake of it, Olivier.

Even in your neck of the woods in French Canada, a parent would be frowned on, to say the least, if they were to allow such behaviour to go on under their roof.

There is a whole world of difference between what you are describing and what is supposedly going on here.

I also don't wish to put any more effort into feeding this weirdo's masturbatory fantasies, which I believe is the whole purpose of this thread in the first place.

Olivier5
 
  2  
Wed 28 Jan, 2015 04:19 pm
@Lordyaswas,
I'm not being argumentative. Just wondering why anyone would object to two kids foundling with each others' genitals... Why can't those kids have fun? What do you care if they play Blue Lagoon? Is that ruining your day or something? What compels old farts to deny young farts the pleasure of sex? Jealousy, and nothing else.
Lordyaswas
 
  2  
Wed 28 Jan, 2015 05:04 pm
@Olivier5,
Are you saying that you would behave in the same way if you were the parent of this 13 year old child? In your own home?, allowing the 12 year old child from next door come in and bathe your naked child and then give him a massage, etc.? With your full knowlege? Openly?

What kind of weirdo are you?


What passes for age of consent in your backwoods hillbilly part of the world?


Lordyaswas
 
  3  
Wed 28 Jan, 2015 05:08 pm
@Lordyaswas,
I'm not feeding this troll any more, and am amazed that there hasn't been a bigger reaction from the people here regarding this subject.

My ghast has been flabbered and I'm out of here.
0 Replies
 
Olivier5
 
  1  
Wed 28 Jan, 2015 05:14 pm
@Lordyaswas,
And you would object to that behaviour because?... other than not offending the neighbours, I mean.
0 Replies
 
ossobuco
 
  1  
Wed 28 Jan, 2015 06:06 pm
People keep aging over days here at a2k; first a six year old boy was suddenly seven on another thread and now an eleven year old girl is described as twelve. Not that that matters in the scheme of things but that I notice it.

I'm peculiar in that I was a fairly isolated female child, only child, whose family moved around until my early teens. I'd hear of playing doctor but didn't understand any giggles. I do remember that when we first moved to Chicago when I was turning nine, sometime in that first year or two a boy up the street was nice to me and we played in his front yard. It was fun, we ran around, but the news got to the parent grapevine and I was told to stay away from him, particularly by the neighbors. I'd no clue why. I am guessing now he was a year older than whatever year I was.

This was overshadowed in my mental template because a girl up the street pushed me over in the (ahem, 30") snow in front of a house across the street from us and "washed my face", an entirely new childhood experience for me., that someone would do that. She didn't go to "our" school and was a toughy, I was told by the people in that house. I still remember the names of the 'offenders'. I've no idea if they were any kind of baddies.

The nuns at that grammar school were pretty cool, looking back, and, or, but, by the time we got to eighth grade, there were lots of rumors flying around about who was petting with whom. I was out of that. Then we moved to California, whence I learned nada for years, this time more strict nuns, except to have crushes on guys in the news or in the hospital I started working in at 16.

I hardly learned to play doctor at all, until I knew a lot of doctors sometime later and it was a lot of fun.

So, past the ramble, I don't know. I take it that early exploration has been normal forever, though I was ignorant of it. So I get Olivier on that.

On the other hand, I think the children in this thread are in an odd circumstance, besides being in the puberty zone. I think the eleven year old girl is almost set in concrete as a future male cleanser person and agree with Punkey that she needs to be superseded in that role with her brother. Or so I think I think.
And, superseded in that role with her friend.
She may become a future orthopedist - her current attention seems to be toward helping, almost professional in that.
The son may have discovered a whole world in one half hour and I don't think that should keep happening, no matter how dad understands their maturity.

Their mental maturity may be a way forward, if they individually could understand that making this a practice is too much too soon for many reasons. I doubt that, by them. I think you've got a problem to face.
glitterbag
 
  3  
Wed 28 Jan, 2015 06:38 pm
I suppose most of us were plain shocked at the idea of a 11 year old girl walking into the bathroom of a 13 year old boy in order to bath him. The crap that came later, was the creepy pants who posted it claimed the little girl sleeps with the naked young teen every week end. Child Protective Services need to have a strong conversation with pedophile daddy.

I also believe he posted this so he could involve others in his perverted enjoyment. He's either stupid or sick, and frankly those two words are not mutually exclusive.
ossobuco
 
  1  
Wed 28 Jan, 2015 07:05 pm
@glitterbag,
The parents are dead, which must be very tough. There is a grandmother there, with a very challenged boy, and the girl became the helper person.
This thread may be a real, or a concept.
If it's real, it's difficult.
 

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