Why do most Americans oppose gay marriage?

I'll never understand people who are bothered by it. It's just two legal, consenting adults loving each other and not physically or mentally hurting anyone in the process. Prejudice people would claim that they are being "mentally hurt" by this, but probably they are "mentally hurt" by everything. Wildly prejudice people always seem to be angry about something. And it's usually something that doesn't require anger. They're overly aggressive, and immature too. A very dangerous combination.

In response to all those that think it's okay to condemn gay people because "the bible says so," this is a hilarious email that some of you may have seen/gotten. It was someone's (not sure who) response to Dr. Laura's (Dr. Laura Schlessinger, radio show host) statement that homosexuality is a sin because the bible tells us so:


"Dear Dr. Laura,

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's law. I have learned a great deal from you, and I try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind him that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the specific laws and how to best follow them.

When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord (Lev. 1:9). The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. How should I deal with this?

I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as it suggests in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness (Lev. 15:19-24). The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

Lev. 25:44 states that I may buy slaves from the nations that are around us. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans but not Canadians. Can you clarify?

I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination (Lev. 10:10), it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?

Lev. 20:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear prescription glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging."

Good post, Jespah.

Love isn't promised in your constitution, eqaulity is, that is why the legal issues are couched in constitutional terms.

In answer to the question asked - Fear of change or the unknown

I still say that most Americans arent bothered by gay marriage,so much as the "in your face" attitude of gay activists.Its sometimes hard to seperate the two.
As an example,a gay pride march that bottles up traffic in a city,where Gays scream at everyone else,then they get offended if you dont react.It seems that they want you to react,just so they can claim victim status.
IMHO,many people have just gotten sick and tired of the whole thing,but is the gay activists that wont let it go.
Like I said in my first post,the fact that the gay community has demanded to marry only for financial reasons(at least,thats a big part of their argument) has also turned people off.

it's an easier isssue to hang your hat on than the ones that require (shudder) extended thought or contemplation. Americans are intellectually lazy by and large.

Homophobia is an easy way to elevate ones self by denigrating an easy target as well, and unfortunately America is becoming more and more astute at this practice, one which has just lately filtered down from the top more and more. We are after all an infant nation in the grand scheme of history, and are still feeling ourselves out self esteem wise.

Just my opinion.

Bi Polar Bear,

I think that your statement that "Americans are intellectually lazy" is taking a "human" trait and thinking that it is an American one.

Humans and all other evolutionary successful animals are naturally lazy. It makes no sense to expend more energy to reach your goals than is necessary.

A polar bear doesn't chase seals with a full belly. A cheetah that kills more antelopes than is necessary to satisfy its desires would soon become extinct due to the waste of energies. Either the cheetahs or the antelopes. Consequently human also work no harder than what is necessary to fulfill their desires. Desires are often a product of imaginations.

Imagination is what makes the difference. Some humans imagine that they need considerably more resources to survive comfortably than others do.(a subject of frequent discussion when my daughters were teenagers ) Some humans imagine that they need more knowledge or power or things to survive than others do. But no one works any harder than he feels he "has to". But people some do do productive things for entertainment.

No person seeks out facts when his brain is satiated (satisfied) with theories. If he is happy with dogma then to attempt to seek out knowledge would be counterproductive for him. (A waste of energy)

So I submit that "laziness" is an evolutionally beneficial trait. We should not be surprised or disgusted when we encounter it, sometimes to extremes.

But I do concede that intellectual laziness is the best reason for "homophobia". Kudos

I agree with akaM.

New learning is hard for humans, at least over a certain age. We get by in daily life to some extent by hanging new info on the outlines already in our brains.

I've gone on about this before here on a2k, how I actually cried conceptualizing all the information in my grading and drainage class. Years later, figuring out the lay of the land and how to deal with various problems related to that is one of the most fun aspects of my job. That crying was sheer frustration. And most of us have trouble learning different types of languages as we age...

Lazy is at worst sloth, etc. But it works to trigger efficient answers sometimes. We've all got the laze.

You know, I hardly ever notice anyone saying, you're right, I'll change my mind. But sometimes an argument someone makes to you sets up a basis for hearing new data another time. Puts down road base, as it were.

Ok, my 2 cents... ( If anyone wants to give me change back that is cool! )
Marriage , the last I remember was a religious based union...between two people. Hmm.... Forgive me , but doesnt america supposedly stand for and support seperation of church and state? Of course we all know that is crap. But for my comment lets just assume the seperation exists.
Marriage = religious union. Marriage shouldnt even fall into a legal catagory at this point. Remember the seperation? Marriage has nothing to do with our physical being and is not manditory for our survival. Just the sex that is only supposed to happen AFTER marriage what ever. So if I choose to ..... in "my" own private religion ... to unite with someone.. why is it anyone elses business? Im not in anyone elses bedroom but "my" own. "My" religion says what "I" can and cant do to enhance "my" own morality as "I" see it. "My" religion dictates how "my" life should be lead to achieve "enlightmnent" , heaven, reincarnation etc. Even if "I" am not religious, it is still "my" choice what "I" feel "I" should do in "my"life to make "me" happy. Religious or not , "my" decisions are mine alone. Where in all of this are "YOU" ? I dont see any reason why anyone else should be able to tell someone who they can and cant marry. There is never a "you" in "my" life... if everyone realized that and lived by it maybe america would be the country it claims to be. Make any sence ?

The only thing I can tell you, as a Dutchman, is that you actually don't notice anything about gays having the right to get married. It did not lead to any breakdown of marriage. The magic's still there! :wink:

I think people have a gut feeling about things that is more powerful than what they can logically articulate.

And literally a marriage...that is able to "bear fruit"...depends on the union of opposing genders.

As a philsophical symbol...I think all the real Power in this life is when opposite things are reconciled...

We split the atom and make a bomb, but the Sun fuses atoms to make One New Atom (two Hydrogens make one Helium Atom the Noble gas...)

And it is fusion energy that is so Wonderful...

(yes I just noticed the sun uses two hydrogen atoms, adam and steve, ok you win, lol...)

But it's a spiritual principle also...the "publicans"...love those who love them, their own kind, so to speak...and the publican is the lowest of the low, working for the enemy but taking an extra cut for himself also...

But Perfection...Divinity...is a matter of union with your opposite, "loving your enemy"...and *something* makes it EASY for us, about puberty time, all of a sudden our "enemy" is just PLAIN DELIGHTFUL, "vive la differnce"...

But then when you are hooked you find out just how painful all those differences are, to hang in there for the long haul...

It was bad when society let down its guard and said ok if you don't have the hots for each other anymore you must not be in love, quit and try again if you like...

Union or disunion between people...it doesn't matter much...so we say...

Maybe not...I don't know...maybe people will connect deeply on internet boards, just talking, mind to mind...and marriage and such things will be less important, in binding us together...we are so weak individually, but so powerful when we are united heart to heart...

I'm completely evading the issue about people who actually have physical desire for their own gender...I couldn't punish anyone for it...but I don't like to give the grade A government stamp of approval to it either...it's not exactly 'catching"....but in a way it is...people who can't take the heat of sleeping with the enemy, so much easier loving your own kind...

One thing is sure, when you take your finger out of the dyke (oops didn't mean to make a pun, lol...) all the kings horses and all the kings men can't put it up again...we will never go back to social disapproval of divorce...or sexual license...the structures that helped keep human society orderly, they are gone with the Wind...that blows where it listeth, I hope we are grown up enough to respect each other 'just because"...but I doubt it...

The world keeps changing and we can't stop it, is one of your many points?

Yes I suppose so...but I think we ought to strive for all we are worth to try to understand the changes...what went before, what came after...why...

Understanding is power, that's another "Matrix" idea, courtesy of the Merovingian...

But it's biblical also...with all thy getting get understanding Prov 4:7.

I apologize for bringing up so many scattered points...they all seemed relevant to me...hard to follow, though...

Communication...the magic thing...so elusive...but you can't quit trying.

I still agree with Susan.

It's none of the states business how I live, with whom or where as long as I don't interfere with others right to do the same.

But intellectual laziness, which has reached an epitome of sorts in the bureaucracies and clergy probably has something to do with it also :wink:

There are numerous reasons why someone might oppose same sex marriages, and they are not all some variation of intolerance, or hatred.

Some people are simply opposed to same sex marriages being allowed by judicial fiat and not the will of the people as expressed through the votes of their elected representatives.

Some people are concerned that something so fundamental to the well being of society is being dramatically altered.

Some people believe it is in direct violation of the teachings of their religion.

I'm sure there are others.

It is narrow minded to assume that all opposition to same sex marriages has a sinister motive.

Exactly. Why, slavery supporters often run into this same sort of prejudice. Slavery is not just a source of cheap labor, its an altruistic setup which provides work, food, shelter, and religion for people too primitive to survive on their own.

Still, everybody makes it out to be so evil....

Sarcasm, I presume?

Everyone has a right to believe what they will.But I do not believe that anyone has a right to impose thier personal beliefs on anyone else.
If gay marriage is against someones personal religion... then that person shouldnt do it. Your religion and lifestyle choices are your own. But to say that the act of 'marriage' is fundamental to our society I don't agree with. todays "ethical" definition of marriage is strictly a religious practise. A ceremony between two people outlined by the rules of thier religion. Marriage it self does not bring about children or any other form of reproduction. Marriage.. by definition..is a union. Since it is strictly that....a union... it can not be desecrated in anyway. Our society would have you believe that a marriage is the only thing that SHOULD bring about procreation... heheh.... but we all know that isn't true.
So still.... why is gay marriage such a bad thing? technically , gay people "marry" all the time. -coming together of / uniting - is what marriage means. So what is the difference ? Marriage to people today has been made to mean many more things then it should I think. And I do not believe that people should be legally married to be able to stay together if they so choose. Laws do not govern my bedroom, why should they govern anyone elses?

Sarcasm and negative emotionally-laden straw men terms like "slavery" seem to indicate an uncertainty about the power of one's pure logic...

If there is such a thing coming from any human mind.

I so agree that no one ought to impose his own vision on anyone else, but that is exactly what human "life" is all about, the strong preying on the weak... Ideal human life to me would be people sharing their visions with one another...a lot of mutual growth and appreciation going on, I run into it sometimes...

We cannot exist as individual entities, we are too weak and vulnerable, we MUST organize into groups...and it is the group opinion that decides whether a particular practice is "everyone's business"...or not...

It is the "world system" that is dog eat dog...or master/slave....that is better than dog eat dog after all...that's why we have to HAVE "masters"...and slaves...because we aren't compassionate enough to forsee all the needs and act accordingly...

The Ideal vision is Love...Love can view the "other" with understanding and appreciation and an impulse to preserve/augment rather than destroy/diminish. Love GIVES before the "needy" tries to extort to get needs met...heads him off at the pass so to speak...

But it takes a long time to learn to love. Really you have to marry and have a child I think...that is the normal way you learn...to foresee needs and meet them, and love your enemy also...the child makes the parents "enemies" somewhat...differing ideas about how to achieve the Good, the child is divisive...

The great divide in humanity, male and female. Two opposed Goods...who must learn to appreciate one another...

I do not see appreciating your own kind as a "marriage", but just self-love.

I know every individual is different and of course any union between any two people is a marriage, in a sense.

I'm not sure what I would vote on this issue, for society...I think probably against gay marriage...I just think it weakens the meaning of Marriage even further...and a lot depends on people make unbreakable commitments to one another...we have so many loose cannons floating about, the people who hang in there for the long haul....well I just think it is important...and there is a natural indication of what is and is not a marriage, once again, able to "bear fruit"...

If only we could all live like that. Love instead of hate. Accept instead of change. <sigh> But you are right, dog eat dog is the biggest way we have learned to evolve. There will always be predator and prey. And they will never shake hands. hehe