How To Meet Women

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I have figured out a foolproof plan to meet women. I am going to go to the park wearing a fireman's uniform, with a puppy, and a baby. I'll just walk around and the women should be all over me. It can't miss, right? I just don't know what breed of puppy is the biggest babe magnet. Also, I think maybe a cute little red-haired baby, under six months old would probably be best. Any thoughts?

What are your thoughts on the best way to meet women?

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Be your exact self. Whoever likes you is worth knowing.

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The baby shouldn't have red hair.
But the uniform and puppy...brilliance!

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A long time ago an old friend of mine would go to the bar deliberately with his arm in a sling and a band-aid above his eyebrow. He would make up some kind of sob story describing how he got his injuries. He claimed it attracted all kinds of women, however, I never saw him do this first hand.

A lot of women are attracted to men in uniform. The puppy is a good idea too. The baby should be older than six months old if you want to be thought of as a single father.

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colorbook wrote:

The baby should be older than six months old if you want to be thought of as a single father.

Good point. But maybe I could tell women that my wife passed away during childbirth. You know, get that sympathety thing going . . . a widower fireman . . . Oh my god, that has got to be pretty much irresistable!

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Yeah, that would get you sympathy alright...your wife's not even cold in her grave and your trying to pick up women.

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ix nay on the freshly dead ife way.

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But they don't know I'm trying to pick up women. I'm not going to make it obvious! LOL

They just see this recently widowed hero with his beautiful baby and the cutest puppy ever. Now I just have to figure out where I can go to borrow a baby and a puppy . . .

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Okay, try it out and let us know if you got the babes or not. By the way, will you get in trouble for impersonating a fireman?

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I like your use of sincerity. Youve gotta think all this through better. If your just hookin up, ok, but otherwise, youre gonna be stuck with a kid , a dog, and a firemans outfit.

The dogs good. An alternative Have a load of wash with Drs scrub whites, lose the kid keep a stethoscope visible, and have the puppy be a Border Collie puppy.

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It will not work, trust me..... But if you must, you can borrow mine. It is not doing much for me.

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hey firemanbud, how about carrying a stethoscope on your firemans outfit?

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I'm a woman... so here's what I think... wait a minute, I need to stop laughing first.....

Ok... oriental babies are the cutest, native American babies are next. Chocolate lab puppies are cutest, boxer pups are next. Fireman's uniform is good... tee hee, my husband fought forest fires, was in the army, has a mechanic's uniform... I love them all. Smile

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A friend of mine borrowed the little blonde dog in my avatar. Took him for a walk down on the boardwalk. Worked like a charm. Met some women playing volleyball and a female cop. Dated the cop for some months, and then used the numbers he got from 2 of the volleyball players. I was joking when I suggested he take Bailey for a walk - but it worked!

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The dog must be a dalmation, and the child must have curly hair.
You should also only be wearing suspenders, no shirt - to show off your ripped abs.

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You *do* have ripped abs....?

(A prerequisite for the fireman outfit...)

I think the Dalmation is negotiable, but the curly hair on the kid is also a must.

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...gotta be a lab puppy, all other breeds will fail..

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Walk around with no shirt, and a boa constrictor (Preferably 9 feet long or more) twined around your chest.
That tactic will weed out the clingy girls!

Or, if you LIKE clingy girls, try walking around with a cockatoo perched on your shoulder. It should preferably be one that knows a few words, like "hiya sweetie"!

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How about the fireman's uniform and the puppy; but instead of the baby, have a few hundred-dollar bills stapled to your back?

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OR, walk around with a sandwich board, "Will Work for Sex"!

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