The University that I am going to attend

Hi everyone, below is my personal statement to HKU. Please help me to check, are my grammar and the use of words correct ? Any comments or feedback are welcome!

My name is Jeffry and I am an Indonesian. I have always been interested in the business world. I choose Hong Kong to further my study because my family has a business here. Since young, I always love to help my parents manage the workers on our company and help them do their business. I wish to study business and management to degree level as I feel the skills and knowledge I will gain will prepare me for a wide range of careers. Taking a business degree at university will give me an opportunity to develop further my knowledge either it is in business studies, maths and economics which I have enjoyed studying since high school.

When I was in Junior High School, I have been following my parents when they are doing business with customers. I learned a lot of stuff from my parents such as the communication skills and how they are selling the products. Which is good for me because from there, I have known the basic of communications, business and marketing in practical way. And when I was in Senior High School, my parents opened up a cafe. From there, I have learnt how to manage employees from the manager whom my parents hired to manage the cafe, so that they can still concentrate on their business.

After I finished my Senior High School, I chose to go to Malaysia to further my study. I chose to go for the "Diploma in Illustration with Entertainment Art" major because it was my passion and hobby since I was young. I have been living in Malaysia for around 2 years, studying at The One Academy of Communication Design, which is Malaysia well known art's college. In here, there are a lot of foreigners, and english is our main language. It has been our daily basis to speak english either in the classroom or outside. This year which is my second year in my college, I learnt about how to advertise a product and known a basic of advertising strategy which will be very useful for my future careers.

In addition to my studies, I have organized my time so that I can have a part-time job. I worked on a sushi restaurant knows as "Sushi Zanmai" as a waiter, since my parents taught me these words "If you want to be a leader, you have to start from the bottom. So that you can understand, what is the feeling to be an employee. And you will know how to manage employees better from your personal experience." From here, I have developed my communication skills through serving the guests directly and learned more hospitality skills. Now I know how to be hospitable with the guest.

I feel the 2 most important points I have learned so far from my current studies. First, it is the will to never give up. In art college, almost all of the students are very competitive and it has been my goal to always give my best for my works. Second, being able to finish my work ahead of the deadlines and handle pressures of the assignments that we had in art college is a lot, and the lecturers never decrease the amount of the assignments.

Time moves fast, and now it is almost the time that I think about what is best for my own and my family's future. Now, my parents are encouraging me to further my study in business. Although, I did mention Illustration art is my hobby and passion since I was young. I really had a lot of fun since the first day I joined The One Academy. But I could not neglect that business is also one of the most important thing in my life. That could help me to expand my family's current business. And it is almost time that my parents need my hands to help them manage their business. Therefore, I chose to withdraw from The One Academy and start looking for a competent University in Hong Kong.

I am a perfectionist and am very determined to learn new things. My hobbies are playing futsal and swimming. I also like to watch movies and read inspirational books. In additional, I have a bass vocal which I found it earlier when I joined the choir of my church in Malaysia. And the conductor said to me that my sounds are very good and I should join the choirs if I was to go to Hong Kong.

I am now looking for an opportunity to further my knowledge in business programs and career progression by enrolling with a reputable university on a business management degree course. I am willing to know more about the business techniques and strategies either it is practical or theory. After viewing many different universities I have come to a conclusion that "Hong Kong University" is the best option for me. What's more IBGM course in Hong Kong University is very unique compares to other courses that is offered in other universities. With all these skills that I have gained from my parents, school, personal experiences, family and friends, I am now ready to compete with other participants who are taking this course. I aim to put all the best into the course, and I really hope that you will look favorably upon my application.