jealous and possevive or justified?

You need a hobby.

When a partner is out with friends, unless you've got a damned good reason for wondering (and being jealous without foundation does not fit the bill), then they can go and have a good time and you should be able to let them go.

Do you feel the burning need to tell him all of the gory details when you and your friends go out for cocktails or a mani-pedi? Does he feel the need to know such things?

Do not assume the worst unless you have a really good reason to do so (e. g. prior cheating by this guy, not some guy who hurt you five years ago). Work with people on their own merits, flaws and weirdnesses.

WHAT are you jealous of?

He said he was going to the movies and he told you he was drinking with friends afterwards. What else do you need to know/

Yes, you do need a hobbie or something to do when he's not around.

Most of the cases problems with self esteem come from the family. If they couldn't show their love for you, or they were really harsh with you, made you feel not good enough, never was satisfied with you, or may be even you witnessed the behaviour of jelousy from your parents. I am not saying this to send some idea to become angry with your family. The other thing I could think of to make you feel so jelaous is if you don't feel secure in this relationship, may be not appreciated enough, don't feel your partner pays much attention to you. Jelousy is a relly painful feeling for both (the jealous person and the partner), puts you in a bad position in the relationship, but it is not thing that you can't overcome. Just take the time to really get to know yourself better (think why you feel you don't have to trust your partner, try to assume that you are wrong and see if you calm down or you continue thinking, your partner is doing something wrong), really think of different cases when your partner may be didn't gave you a reason to be jelaous, think of things your partner has done for you to show her/his love! Another book I love is for better comunication - Clean Slate Method By T.W. Jackson

First, I never messwith a guy who had to get drunk to have a good time. That led to stupidity among other things. Second, if I had to be insecure and wonder, then I wasnt going to spend my time that way. I come and go, and he comes and goes now and plenty of the time we dont give account for it, but I'm sure I wont find panties anyplace because I have an adult around me, not some unreliable child.