@snood,
Part of the problem to me is that many think as I used to, that marriage is a religious institution. It is, can be, but it is also a separate civil institution. Religions are welcome (to me) to guard their own houses - but not everyone's.
I don't know how it is now in Italy, but when I was first there in the eighties, many people were married twice, once at the chiesa, and once at the state (or was it city?) office. Thus two excuses to wear bridal gowns and have great food.