Montana - don't wait a month. File a formal complaint the second he is three weeks behind.
You need to paper that file.
Beth
He has been paying, although never on time, he only owes me a week for the first week of August.
He hasn't been complying with the rest of the court order though.
June 30th - He was ordered to send me copies of his pay stubs every month. He hasn't.
July 29th - I expressed my concern to the mediator about the inconsistant child support payments and he was ordered to set up an automatic deposit with his bank from his account to mine on the same day every week (we have the same bank). He hasn't done this.
First week of Aug he didn't make a payment. I confronted him on this and he says he payed me a week in advance in July, but he's talking about an extra deposit he made for our sons birthday gift, so he's going to try to scam me out of a week.
Also, ever week he makes his deposits a day or two later than the last week in an attempt to try and scam me out of a week here and there.
When he goes back into court in a month, I'm going to take this all up with the mediator because there has to be some way to prevent this bastard from pulling one scam after another.
Montana - don't wait.
I work in a different area - but some similar issues come up. You've got to document your concerns as they come up - and then summarize them later. The file has got to be papered, or it's going to end up looking like this isn't crucial to you.
Beth
It's so much easier said than done, since we're talking about the Cambridge Family Court. Yesterday I asked to talk to who was in charge of my file, but they said my file wouldn't come back up from the court for another week and that there was nothing I could do. The clerks office superviser got pissed off at me because I wanted to take some action, so I figured it was better to just wait the month and talk things through with the mediator who is far more understanding and sympathetic to my situation. The clerks office over there doesn't know their ass from their elbows and the last time they pulled my file, they lost it for long enough to delay my court date. I can't count the screw ups they've made over the years with my file and I don't want to delay things any longer.
MOntana so sorry to hear that this is still not going well for you.
I went 2 weeks ago for my support thing. The lady told me I would have to get a job, and also may end up paying half of joe's insurance because he is covering my son right now! I have never heard of such a thing in my life. On a better note on my case though, I have an excellent lawyer, who is a judge, and he thinks I have a good case. So I am feeling a bit better about my stuff. I hope everything works out with you........
Thanks Zacksmom. I don't know who this lady is that told you that you would have to get a job, but that's bull and I wouldn't listen to her. You have a job and that's caring for your son which happens to be a 24 hour a day job. The courts never told me I needed to get a job and my son is 17. I think you have a great case as well, so you hang in there and fight the good fight ;-)
thanks so much! yeah my lawyer told me too not to get a job right now, because that's my whole case really, saying that I am home to care for zack, and joe isn't. so I am hoping that it goes the way I want to. Thanks again. I hope everything goes well for you too!!
Thanks Zacksmom and you'll be in my thoughts throughout your ordeal ;-)
Update
My ex went to court Thurday and once again I sat by the phone all day waiting for the court to call and nothing. I waited until 6pm before I called my ex. He tells me that the court tried to call me, but couldn't get an answer, so he went in front of the judge and was given a new order without my ok. I was not happy about this at all since I had obvious issuse that I needed to address before he went in front of the judge, because if I appeal the order, I have to travel all the way back there. My ex was drunk and rude, so I couldn't get any information from him Thursday. After brewing all day Thursday and Friday, I called his house to talk to him Friday. His crazy wife got on the phone and started screaming at me to stop calling her house. I told her that as long as the father of my son lived at her house and I had things to talk to him about, I would continue to call. She hung up on me 3 times and threatened to get a restraining order on me, lol, and then she finally put my ex on the phone. I was very calm and told him that we needed to discuss this like two mature adults or else I was going to appeal the order. He agreed (while I'm listening to his wife screaming in the back, lol) and he told me what the terms of the court order were. I felt much better after talking with him because it's like the court read my mind and I was very pleased with the way they arranged everything. When my ex was in court, I guess he admitted to them that he owed me 3 weeks in back support and also admitted that he was employed when he went into court last month and refused to wait and see the judge, so he was not only ordered to pay me the back support owed, but also the amount that generated from the date he was in court last month. My child support was also increased to the amount I asked for. I was also going to mention to the courts if they called that he's suppose to send me proof of his income every now and then and hasn't, but they covered that base as well. The only thing that the court order didn't cover is the problem I've had with inconsitant child support payments, but I talked with my ex about that and told him that he needed to be consistant with the support and if he wasn't, I was going to go back down there and drag him back into court and get the 12 years worth of child support, where he never paid me a dime, for the first 12 years of our sons life and file contempt charges while I was there. I told him that I will no longer put up with any nonsense and he needed take responsabilty in helping provide for our son. He agreed to comply with my request as he knows damn well that I'm very serious in what I said.
So, all in all, everything worked out for me in the end and now I can finally breath easy and know that justice was on my side.
Phew!!!! It's been a long ride!!!
Wow, that's wonderful Montana!
Have you heard anything from the court directly? Can you call someone?
It makes me a little nervous to think of the information coming from him and only him.
Sozobe
Thanks :-D ;-)
I will be getting a copy of the court order in the mail within a week or so, so I'll know exactly what is stated on the order. I do believe what he says because he knows I'm going to get a copy of it anyway. I could call the court, but I don't even know who I would talk to over there. If I don't recieve the court order in the mail within 2 weeks, you bet I'll be making some calls and ask to talk to whoever is in charge of my file. I also tend to believe what he said because it's all stuff that was covered in mediation in both June and July and are things that the mediators told me that he was going to be ordered to do. That court house is so unorganized that I never thought they'd get it right unless I reminded them. I was pleasantly surprised to say the least :-D
Thats so great. I'm glad you'll be getting confirmation.
Because the cynic in me wonders if he could be saying all the right things to get you off his back... and then it turns out that it was something else, and you had a week to appeal, or something.
Oooh, there has to be someone you can call. I mean the part about them trying to call you and you were right there by the phone... that's a little stinky. I'm sure it's fine but this seems like the kind of thing where you want to be 110% sure...
You're absolutely right Soz. I know it takes a week for the file to get back up to the clerks office from court, so I think I'll call Thursday and have them fax me a copy of the order, just to be on the safe side. Thanks for your advice ;-) When it comes to my ex, one can never take his word on anything.
Faxing is a great idea!!
Why not Monday, tho?
sozobe wrote:Faxing is a great idea!!
Why not Monday, tho?
Last time I called the court after he appeared, they told me it takes a week for the file to get back up to the clerks office, so Thurs will be a week. I'm not worried though. I know I'd have atlest a month to appeal, so all is good.
Thanks Littlek :-D
I'm a very happy camper today ;-)
Cool. (And you said that the first time, I missed it, sorry.)
I wish I could go pick you guys up and take you out to eat and drinks to show you all my appreciation for all your support :-D
