over-reaction?

U can say the same thing to 2 different people
1 of whom will not care and the other of whom
will slug u in the mouth, causing major dental fractures.

For your happiness,
I hope that u are getting professional mental help. U 'd probably enjoy it.





David

Consider this - because I think a lot of your issues are driven by a lack of empathy - would you love to be referred to as stupid or brain-dead? I know I wouldn't. You were nasty to these people and you were reported for that. It's not an overreaction at all - they deserve to be able to go to work and not be abused by you.

What about what management did to me? I may lack some empathy, but I was just angry while saying these things lol.

If I were management, I wouldn't give a damn.

Sorry, but I would need for as many of my workers to be harrassment-free as possible. If one person is the cause of problems for several others, that one person is gonna get the brunt of things from me as a manager - and I would push that person to get anger management counseling. You are a worker and you are meant to be a professional. This means that "I got angry" isn't an excuse. You set things aside and do your job like everyone else, regardless of whether they like you.

No.

I heard of a sign mounted in the Pentagon: "Engage BRAIN before operating MOUTH."

DD22, before u speak to anyone, it will help u to figure out how
anything will change (for YOU) as a result of your saying that.
After the words have escaped from your mouth its too late
for u to control them; do so WHILE U STILL CAN.

One other point, DD22:
since u seem to CARE whether others like u or not,
u might consider actually doing things for them that will make them happy.

Good Luck





David

It seems like you get angry too easily. Even if you were rightfully provoked (and it doesn't look that way, the way you describe these situations or better yet, the way your thread has a lack of proper descriptions on these encounters), you need to learn to hold back these bitter verbal comebacks.

With this and your other threads, you describe how you burn almost every bridge you come across.

You need to learn patience and perhaps eat a slice of humble pie to boot.

If you must, keep in mind that your shift manager doesn't have you in his or her goodwill. If that's really so, then why would you give him or her the ammunition to make your life a living hell. Your building a case for them to fire you from this job. They don't have to do anything. You're self destructing here at this job as well as your past jobs mentioned in your previous threads.

When your coworker sold that breakfast burrito, did she really commit a crime? Hurt anybody? Go easy on her and after awhile karma might help you out.

The same can be said of the coworker that was TRYING TO HELP YOU. This to me makes the least sense of all the problems listed in this thread. Clearly you have issues with authority. Some people think that's a case of principled belief. If you understand the consequences of your actions against management, then continue at your own risk.

But to lash out at someone who's helping you clean the restrooms (and something tells me that this is an unwanted task at your work), regardless of whether she volunteered to help or was assigned to help you, couldn't you try to bond with this coworker, even temporarily while you were handling this gruesome task?

Clearly this coworker has a right to be bitter against you for this unnecessary attack against her. If she's slow cleaning the restroom, help her to finish. Wash your hands and move on. You just might earn someones respect for an incident free encounter.

So what you need to do now is have and hold your job for 6 months without incident. You need to build up a fair bit of healthy and incident free work history. If that means attending an anger management class or something to that effect in order to curb any volatile outbreaks so be it.

You need to find a job where the work appeals to you, the workplace holds a safe and welcoming atmosphere, and the people for whom you work for and with are a source of trust and friendship.

I hate to break it to you DD (and I know you know this simple fact of life). They are management and you are not. Simple fact of how are society works. They make the decisions in how and who to manage their workplace. They may be unfair. They might play favorites but they are in the position of authority while you are not.

If you must hold a confrontational belief that management and other authority figures are out to get you then don't give them any reason to write you up and/or fire you. Do you realize that your building an incredibly difficult job history that could haunt you the entire entire working life?

Put on the shoes of a potential employer and take a look at your recent employee history. Would you hire you knowing that you a difficult to manage and work with? Things need to change and you need to start by helping yourself out by ACTUALLY getting help regarding your anger problems.

DD, the Tsar 's posts r full of very GOOD ADVICE for u,
especially this point:


My best advice to u, DD, is that when u stand next to someone
to speak to him or her, ask yourself:
"what can I say to make this person HAPPY, so he'll like me???"

Instead of hurling insults, be generous in conviviality, praise and showing ADMIRATION.

I remain confident that u 'd be happy and content with the services of a psychiatrist,
because u show very strong signs of subconscious self-destructive intentions,
that u put into operation with insults.

I believe that some psychiatrists work for free (pro bono) on a charitable basis.
Maybe u can Google up some free ones.





David

Based on your history, I think you believe you are unlovable and you are continually trying to prove it.

You need some therapy, dude, for your own good. You don't want to spend the next 60 yrs sabotaging your life, do you?

I think DD is a dudette.

I was just pissed that Katy didn't like me from DAY 1. I'm just frustrated that I couldn't get her to like me, so it spills over. btw, I did try to beg her and pay her $$$ and it didn't work.

I'm 39 years old and clearly haven't heard of everything. I don't expect to know of everything either but for the sake of my poor memory, I have NEVER heard of such a thing outside of the movies where anyone in real life would try and pay someone money to be ... what friends?

DD, you need to move on and forget this Katy. Okay, you learned it didn't work. You shouldn't let this destroy the rest of your life and livelihood.

I'm not even sure if apologizing to Katy is a wise thing at this point. People are irrational. Maybe Katy doesn't like you for some kind of irrational reason and this bribe is only going to make things worse not better.

Maybe in the long run if you try and clean up your act. Try and get yourself help and sincerely follow through with whatever this help prescribes, then this Katy will find you worthy of friendship. You might find yourself with many new friends and/or a job that's spiritually, creatively, and/or financially rewarding as well.

You're a very patient person, Stephan. I hope she will listen to you.

Well, maybe it has something to do with how u handle it.
I agree with not putting it: "Hay, I 'll give u $50 to be my friend",
but dumping joy boms on people can have significant beneficial effects.

Like, suppose u say: "Hay, will u do me a favor?
Here, take this <hands over $1OO.oo bill> and see how much fun u can get from it"
and walk away, or just drop it in front of her or him
n say: "Hay, see if u can have any fun with this."

Sometimes, it can be fun.
If questioned, just explain that the creation of JOY is good
and the creation of misery is bad.





David

What was your goal, your intention, in expressing this??
Did u wish to change the availability of food at different times of the day ?
Y was this significant to u ?




For what reason did u ask her that question??

Was it better for u, if she worked faster,
or if she were more intelligent ?

What was your motivation ?





David

David, you may go through life dropping money on people and get sustenance out of it, but it is an ill advised thing to approve of for Dirrty Dozen.

U think?
Y don 't u try it and see how well it works?

BTW, what is it that u want me to get u from the bookstore in Portland, again ?





David

This Katy was at McD's. I was there from '09-'10. I was simply writing of this job in more details. And btw, my first 7 months was incident free bc I didn't even know Katy didn't like me. It's only when she told me so that I flipped out.