9
   

"Life Is Short, Have An Affair": What Do You Think?

 
 
firefly
 
Reply Sun 3 Apr, 2011 03:19 pm
I recently heard about the Ashley Madison Web site--a "discreet dating sevice" designed to match up married people (or others in long term relationships) for purposes of having an affair. Their motto is, Life is short, have an affair.
http://www.ashleymadison.com/app/public/media/index.p#pressreleases

They actively promote the idea of having an affair to deal with an unsatisfying marriage.


What do you think of this idea?

Is adultery a good solution to deal with an unsatisfying marriage?

Is there a difference between an affair that develops in a real life setting as opposed to one arranged by an online dating service?

Could this dating service even lead to a satisfying affair--beyond a simple sexual hook-up? What would make for a "good affair"?

Is adultery always wrong?

 
djjd62
 
  1  
Reply Sun 3 Apr, 2011 03:28 pm
they've been big advertisers for few years now on satellite radio, i at least applaud their honesty, i mean lets face it, craigslist and every other dating sight has been used for the same purpose, if the folks here are using the site for its appropriate purpose every one should know where they stand
BillRM
 
  0  
Reply Sun 3 Apr, 2011 03:37 pm
@firefly,
I seen an interview with the married CEO of that firm who when ask the normal question for such a CEO had reply that he is happily married and does not used his company services.
0 Replies
 
bob the brave
 
  3  
Reply Fri 13 Dec, 2013 08:37 am
@firefly,
If both parties want an open marriage then great, otherwise it is a breach of contract and trust. I work with a guy who lived by exactly that motto, even said those very words. Now he is divorced and making child support payments on minimum wage.
PUNKEY
 
  1  
Reply Fri 13 Dec, 2013 07:42 pm
Why is getting a divorce not an option?

(I know several gals who stay for the money. One guy stayed because of the kids - 25 miserable years)
ossobuco
 
  3  
Reply Fri 13 Dec, 2013 08:21 pm
@firefly,
Programmed affairs?



Give me a break.
0 Replies
 
gj98
 
  1  
Reply Mon 16 Dec, 2013 04:55 am
@bob the brave,
I disagree with the idea to have an affair because life is short. I think this is a stupid and dishonest idea. This is ruining marriages and families. I just feel this whole idea is completely wrong in all ways possible. It is encouraging people to become liars and to be untrustworthy to their wives and husbands. This is immoral and needs to be stopped immediately for the sake of innocent people who are having to put up with this nonsense. Can you imagine if it was your wife or husband who was taking part in this, how would you feel? Think how hurt you would be to know if this was be happening in your relationship. Also, think if you are the person doing it what pain and heartache you will eventually bring to the person you are married to. I think that if you don’t want to be in a relationship with someone then you should tell them instead of doing the wrong thing and having an affair. Also, if there are children involved in all of this think how they would feel knowing that one of their parents was having an affair behind their other parents back. It would cause great distress to the whole family and especially towards the children.
maxdancona
 
  2  
Reply Mon 16 Dec, 2013 09:17 am
@gj98,
Which do you think is more harmful to a family; a discreet affair, or a divorce?

chai2
 
  1  
Reply Mon 16 Dec, 2013 09:24 am
@PUNKEY,
I guess it would be up to the individual to decide if divorce is an option or not.
maxdancona
 
  0  
Reply Mon 16 Dec, 2013 09:27 am
@chai2,
I chose divorce, but particularly with children involved I can easily see why for some people an affair is a preferable option.
0 Replies
 
timur
 
  1  
Reply Mon 16 Dec, 2013 09:42 am
@maxdancona,
I don't think you are talking to a real person.

Posts this format appear to be rampant.

First time posters, 200 to 220 words, 850 to 1000 characters.
0 Replies
 
97watkinsj1
 
  2  
Reply Mon 31 Mar, 2014 05:19 am
@djjd62,
life is short so make it happy stay with the people you love and not hurt them if your not happy in a realtionship finish it you dont cheat you finish the relationship its hiyurtfull and meaningluss to cheat you just don do it
0 Replies
 
Linkat
 
  2  
Reply Mon 31 Mar, 2014 08:32 am
@firefly,
I guess my biggest question here are all spouses aware of this? Those that are trying to hook up on this affair website? If not, then no I definately think it is wrong. To me, it makes no difference how you start an affair -- especially when you are hiding it.

Now if the other spouse knows about it and doesn't care, I am on the fence. Not whether it is right or wrong-- I can't decide someoné else's morals, but I have a hard time believing that for most people, this still wouldn't hurt a marriage.

Their motto is, Life is short, have an affair - pretty much sucks. You could then say Life is short, kick a puppy, Life is short, do drugs-- you could pretty much replace it with whatever vice or illegal or immoral thing you want to replace it with.
maxdancona
 
  0  
Reply Mon 31 Mar, 2014 08:43 am
@Linkat,
An affair is at its core a romantic relationship. I don't see romance as anything like doing drugs or kicking puppies.
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Mon 31 Mar, 2014 08:47 am
@Linkat,
I saw an article yesterday or the day before about how people in marriages the partners feel are happy are having affairs now. I read a few sentences and didn't save a link - that may be a trend for all I know. Some kind of how to stay together for the long run concept. If I see it again in passing, I'll post a link.
Setanta
 
  1  
Reply Mon 31 Mar, 2014 08:54 am
Adultery is bad, but not as bad as infantry.

Whether or not such a relationship is contracted in person or online is meaningless. There's a trust relationship there that's being betrayed. It is often said "marry in haste, repent at leisure." Perhaps one could blame the pressure to marry for leading people into doomed relationships. However, i think divorce followed by "playing the field" would be a more honest way to proceed.
0 Replies
 
George
 
  6  
Reply Mon 31 Mar, 2014 08:59 am
For me, having an affair would definitely make my life short.
0 Replies
 
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Mon 31 Mar, 2014 09:06 am
@ossobuco,
I can understand the driving attraction of affairs and can understand and somewhat approve what I take is the european (and other lands') view of them or some parts of those populations' views - - they happen, society lives on, leave the applecarts standing. I'm more of the be together or get a divorce viewpoint personally, getting the divorce once you're sure the marriage is off its wheels, and doing that before an affair. I'm also increasingly over the years not for early marriage, while the lovers are still in the midst of growing up.
0 Replies
 
Linkat
 
  1  
Reply Mon 31 Mar, 2014 09:17 am
@maxdancona,
I disagree that an affair is romantic at its core especially in the way they are describing in this website - it is for sex. An affair is cheating on another person whom you are supposedly have an agreement not to do so via a vow. Not much romantic about that.

But if you prefer - you can replace it with:

Life is short, so to ahead and f***. Life is short, might as well cheat. Life is short, screw your vows.

Linkat
 
  2  
Reply Mon 31 Mar, 2014 09:20 am
@ossobuco,
I don't disagree that some can feel this way -- why I said most rather than all.

In this situation why don't you just be roommates rather than break a vow. I know many mentioned why don't you just get divorced. My assumption for these that are happy this way, they are married, but on paper only -- they are probably nothing more than glorified roomates. So in a sense to me, these couples are divorced -- just not on paper -- sorta like couples that do not want to get married, but are devoted to each other and simply say, I don't need a piece of paper to be married.
 

Related Topics

 
  1. Forums
  2. » "Life Is Short, Have An Affair": What Do You Think?
Copyright © 2018 MadLab, LLC :: Terms of Service :: Privacy Policy :: Page generated in 0.05 seconds on 10/16/2018 at 06:52:19