Weird Stuff on Cable

Ive spent a LOT of time watching cable for the last month and a half. Im amazed at how channels , like the HISTORY CHANNEL, have NO History at all.
Or how Discovery celebrates the dysfunctional Tuttle family of bike builders to a point that the shows are unwatcheable.
CAKES< CAKES CAKES, who really gives a **** . Nobody can eat fondant..
I had to stay away from anything titillating (doctors orders) so I tried watching some of the softer core porn like "REal wives of NJ" or "WHO THE **** GIVES A **** ABOUT ANYBODY NAMED KARDASHIAN?"
Those shows celebrate narcissism and the function that there are no intelligent hot chicks.

I watched the show about hillbilly fishing for catfish . In this show, they get some hotties and stick em in water up to their necks and then they have to stick their hands into underwater crevasses and grab a big flathead catfish by the lip.

Then theres the show where these guys buy old storage lockers at auction and then the "unwrap" them and see what they get for the contents. If you see one of those shows, youve seen em all.


I think network tv has given up without a fight and we are left with all this crap.

Now that Im conscious I can enjoy DEXTER or BREAKING BAD. HOMELAND aint too bad, I think it may get wings.

Update

There are now four shows that I know of about ghosts! Ghost hunting. Hauntings. Possessions. Four shows, and not once has anybody seen a ghost!

Highlight: On one show, the ghost hunters were at an old fort that at one time housed Spanish soldiers. Also French. The ghost hunters were talking to the ghosts in English. Did the dead learn English in their spare time? Then one of the ghost hunters got a Spanish dictionary. Como esta?

There are also shows about finding Big Foot--sea serpents, and other creatures that some folks think exist.

If we're gonna have reality tv, shouldn't it be based in reality?

New show on Animal Planet: Call of the Wildman. I haven't watched this all the way through. I've seen a man jump into murky water to find turtles. Big ones.

I saw one episode of some ghost hunt show this week. I was in a motel with really shitty cable and all they had was Jesus stations, Home shopping , ESPN and SyFy. So I watched a SyFy ghost "reality" show which seemed to be shot entirely using night vision goggles, and, like Michael Jackson wearing one glove, they didnt explain why the night vision goggles were even needed.
Funny you should mention that they dont find any ghosts. After about 20 minutes I bailed and watched a old Lafayette basketball game. I FUCKIN WATCHED A BASKETBALL GAME!!! SOBER!!!

Sober?! What's the woild coming to?

Update

So I was watching a show called The Worst Cooks in America. I'm now wondering whether being a truly lousy, horrendous cook may have something to do with intelligence. Why?

Comment from a woman whose husband was hospitalized with food poisoning. "Nobody told me you couldn't leave food out all day." Hey, lady. People didn't invent refrigerators just for the hell of it.

The challenge: Cook something with the flavor of different countries. Countries were assigned.

"I would be able to cook something from Lebanon if I knew where Lebanon was. I could use my intellectual abilities to figure it out." (Thud)

"I know all about Sweden. It's cold. It's got lots of mountains. And it's in Switzerland." (THUD)

Finally, a comment from a man. This made me laugh.

"Tofu? TOFU? I eat meat. I eat things that had parents."

Love it! Thanks for giving me a laugh.

I just reread this whole thread. Thanks to some recommendations from posters, I now watch Pawn Stars all the time. (I wish they would fire Chumlee.)

I also occasionally watch American Pickers. I like seeing the characters the pickers buy from more than I like what they're picking.

I have found Mike Rowe and Dirty Jobs. Last night he was working at a reptile place. A python took a dump on him.

There's another show about pawn shops. Hardcore Pawn. Not interesting or educational. Just three members of a dysfunctional family running a pawn shop in a poor area in Detroit.

And I now watch Storage Wars. Abandoned storage units are auctioned off. There's a show from California and a show from Texas. The regular characters vary from ooky to kind of interesting.

Now I'm gonna go watch some TV. Who knows what I might be missing.

You covered the ones I watch now semi-regularly. Pickers and Storage Wars are pretty good and fun. Deadliest Catch and Ice Road Truckers have both caught my attention last year, but I lost interest again. Perhaps because with those first 2 professionsm, it's sort of a hobby; however, with these last 2 these professions, they're fighting for their lives and danger is around every corner.

Worst one as far as a concept is Repo Games - Car Repossession Game Show. I watched 10 mins. Too sad and too close to someone's sad reality.

I love Pawn Stars too - grandpa is really funny! I even like the Detroit pawn shop! They had a spin off from the Detroit pawn shop where the guy who did all their metal restoration work showed how they restored old coke machines or antique hot dog stands - that man did incredible work!

"A hundred ways to die" is another entertaining show...

theyve changed it to "A Thousand Ways to Die". Theyve discovered that humans have an almost infinite repertoire of stupid.

We've mentioned all the ghost shows. So far, ghosts have spoken but not appeared.

One of the shows has a psychic. She sees dead people. Speaks with them and who knows what all. When she's doing this, she makes funny faces. When she's not doing this, she doesn't make funny faces.

This is TV. I'm skeptical. Even if it weren't TV I'd be skeptical. But my skepicism is more pronounced because it's on TV.

Earlier this evening, I was flipping channels. What do I find? A pet psychic on Animal Planet. An elegant looking and sounding English woman who calls everyone darling communicates with animals. I don't know what language they communicate in. Instead of training or dog psychology (the dog whisperer), this woman solves pet behavior issues by communicating directly with the pet to find out what the problem is.

BTW, this woman also communicates with dead pets if they happen to be hanging around. And an occasional dead human may chime in.

Whatta woild.

I saw a promo for a new reality show on cable. Five Amish young adults decide to leave the sheltered Amish life and go out on their own. Where do they go. Noo Yawk City. Seems like a helluva leap to me. I wonder if the producers were involved in this decision.

Hey, young Amish people. I got a bridge you'd love to own. It's downtown--near Brooklyn.

I may watch this show if I can find it.

Probably find it on either TLC or the History Channel (misnomers both). They should rename them WeirdStuff1 and WeirdStuff2.

It will be on TLC.
http://www.realitytvworld.com/news/tlc-premiere-new-breaking-amish-reality-series-on-september-9-13770.php

Thanks, Irish and firefly. I'll probably watch the first episode just to see if I like it.

For the last several days, ALL prime time viewing on Animal Planet has been about Finding Bigfoot, Looking for Bigfoot, Maybe Seeing Bigfoot, Finding a Bigfoot Footprint, Maybe Hearing Bigfoot, Where's Bigfoot?

Day after day after day. Night after night after night.

Hey, Animal Planet. The Loch Ness monster is feeling left out. And I'd like to see an actual animal program--or a program about an actual animal.

if they catch bigfoot, and you're not watching, you'll feel really left out, B...

I watched that too. I laugh because the investigating crew that is featured in it is so biased about that Sasquatch exists that it's comical.

Hey, RH, If they find one, it will be in the news before it shows up on a filmed TV show.

Ragman, You actually watched one of these shows? I just see the promos and the titles. Don't need to see the whole show to know there's some bias involved.

Meanwhile, Animal Planet is bigfooting us up the ass, so to speak.

There are more shows than I can count about ghosts. Biased crews? These people are nuts. And so far, ain't seen a damned ghost.

Just had a thought. I'm gonna e-mail Animal Planet immediately. GHOST OF BIGFOOT. It can't lose.

Here's my lame excuse for watching it: I couldn't find the remote and I woke up and it was on the TV. I was too snoozy to get up to change the station or find the remote.

Those 30 mins I'll never get back again.

Now, where's that 24-hr election coverage station?

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I've been watching Pawn Stars TV show on History Channel (Gold and Silver Pawn Shop in Las Vegas). Love it when those people who try to get money from the pawn-brokers for fake stuff. Or even better, when people come in and have no idea they have a huge treasure and get far more money when they sell than they're originally expecting.

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Roberta: somehow you've scared off those ghosts. Such a shame, too, - after all, aren't they all supposed to be as good-natured as Casper?