Depressed Wife/Affected Kids

Forums: Marriage, Relationships, Kids, Depression
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My wife of narly 5 years is not the same woman that I married. We had a daughter right after marriage and now have a son. She works part time evenings and I work during the day. She is annoyed by everything, especially the kids. She lays in the bed all day with the kids at home and then watches Soaps on TV the rest of the day. She has no desire to do anything. Sex has become a thing of the past and she has completely let herself go. My advise goes in one ear and out the other. She has been to numerous counselors and has taken numerous medications for depression. She is only getting worse. I am seriously thinking about getting a divorce, however I am worried about the kids. I strongly believe that I will get the kids based her mental status with depression and I will fight tooth and nail for them. They love being around Daddy, but hate the yelling from Mommy all the time. I am nearing the end of the road on our marriage....I just can't help someone all the time that doesn't want to be helped. I grew up in this life and I be damned if I am going to continue to live it. I am asking for your advice and life experiences here to better provide me with direction.

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H-M-M-M
Two kids in 5 years and works part time outside the house?

She may have delayed post partum depression.

She needs a complete physical.

Go with her to the Dr. and explain what is going on.

Get some help in the house. Hire someone if needed. You need another set of eyes in the house. Living with a depressed parent DOES affect the kids. Get them in a safe and secure environment, even if that means the marriage breaks up.

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@blach11,

The kids will grow to hate you if you live with them all of the time because you will be the only parent to dicipline them

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@Proxima,

Proxima - that's a load of bull. Discipline does not lead to hatred. In fact, boundaries are important and when reasonable and well-played more often lead to respect.

blach11 - Have you expressed to your wife how unhappy YOU are in the marriage. If she's not too far gone she might budge if she knows you're thinking about leaving and taking the kids. On the other hand, maybe she is that far gone. I like to lean of Glasser's Reality Therapy questions:

What do you want?
What are you doing to get it?
What is working? What is not?
Based on the above, what's your plan?

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@blach11,

She must be in depression, you have to understand her and talk with her. If possible get some medication. Actually she is taking to much effort for your family. please chk out environment of her office , might it is one of the reason of her depression, who knows?

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Depressed Wife/Affected Kids

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