22
   

Friends from our Childhoods

 
 
2PacksAday
 
  1  
Reply Sun 7 Nov, 2010 05:32 pm
@OmSigDAVID,
Rational thought, I wish there were some way to teach that....maybe it's always been this way, but it seems that it's becoming rarer by the min.

I've always found my area to be fascinating in many aspects....psychologically, sociologically..etc, as this is a crossroads of sorts of the nation. Being from such a small closeknit community, I get to observe/study it with ease.

Clinical depression goes hand in hand with poverty....that friend in particular comes from a family that is often refered to as "dark clouds"....if one of them comes around they will most definitely rain on your parade.

I tend to avoid words such as jealous or inferior, I will say that with both friends there is some of that going on....but in knowing them as well as I do, it is understandable so I don't fault them for it...it is their disbelief, in what or who I've become that I have so much trouble dealing with.

If my friends and I would have crashed the party that night, chances are the cops would have looked the other way if not joined in....think storming the bastille. Truthfully though, the kids that were there that night were not the core group of evil ones....but I still would liked to have at least kicked the door in.

The smaller the town, the more visible you are. In just a few words I could shed a great deal of light on this, but I don't want to say much more about either of my friends on the www. I've left huge holes in all that I've written already, but I'll say that these two friends also represent the two halfs of my city, which is also divided geographically in a have/have not fashion....even though there is little difference between them on average. It's all in their heads, I wish I could scoop all the nonsense out, and replace the voids with rationality....I would grout their phyche with reason.
2PacksAday
 
  1  
Reply Sun 7 Nov, 2010 06:04 pm
@msolga,
I can say that political views have nothing to do with this in any way, at the lower levels of gov...."politics" does come into play at times, but in the grander sense of tit for tat.....party lines and such are not an issue....the world views the US as one big conserative party...with some being just less conserative {our liberals}....the same goes for small town usa....were all a bunch of righties. To see this visually....search for a county by county presidential election map.

In short, my two friends, have been so ingrained with the idea that no matter what they do, they will always be second or third class citizens....in their own right, they have both been successful, but they will never see it that way, nor see me in that way either.
msolga
 
  1  
Reply Sun 7 Nov, 2010 06:19 pm
@2PacksAday,
Thanks for your response, 2Packs.
I was thinking more of "political differences" at the local level (you & the mayoral position & possible differences with those old friends who might have different ideas or priorities) rather than your national politics. (Sorry for the confusion.) But I'm barking up the wrong tree here, by the sounds of it ...

Quote:
In short, my two friends, have been so ingrained with the idea that no matter what they do, they will always be second or third class citizens....in their own right, they have both been successful, but they will never see it that way, nor see me in that way either.

Ah. I see. Very limiting friendships. Very limiting for both them & for you.




JPB
 
  1  
Reply Sun 7 Nov, 2010 06:28 pm
@2PacksAday,
It's always a pleasure to read your thoughts, 2packs.

I think that classism exists to some extend everywhere. It's probably felt more by those who live in small towns because everyone knows everyone. Everyone feels judged by everyone else. Everyone takes on parts of that and rejects other parts based on their own sense of self worth.

I started out in a small town on the wrong side of tracks and was judged accordingly. I felt it pretty deeply and still jump down someone's throat if I hear them run down someone else. We moved to a larger community when I was 12 and, although we were still on the wrong side of the tracks, I didn't have the sense of not belonging nearly as much as I had before.

I've known "mad at the world" types and have found them very hard to be around except in small doses. I've also know social wannabes who try to fit in with those they think judge rather than be judged as somehow lacking. Fortunately, I know a few folks who are comfortable enough in their own skin to make a positive influence on those around them. I see you as one of those lucky few. I'm happy for you that you stayed and put down roots. I'm happy for your daughter that she was elected homecoming queen. I'm also glad you and your friends didn't break the door in at the party.

I imagine some of your towns folks will treat you a little differently if you become mayor. Some in ways you expect, some in ways you don't.
0 Replies
 
2PacksAday
 
  1  
Reply Sun 7 Nov, 2010 06:45 pm
@msolga,
Yeah, difference of opinions....that's fairly rare too.

The biggest debate that I've ever been involved with, was about setting up a standard code for rental property, we have a few "slum lords" in town, and their rentals tend to look a bit shabby. This dragged on for several months, was passed, recended, passed again, then finally became, as they say "stuck in commitee"....or tabled indefinitely.

Another biggie, was a pit-bull ban....I was the only one for this law, it was my bill so to speak, and the other 4 council members were against me....they made jokes about how a poodle can also be vicious, and all the usual things that are said in that argument.....so I lost that one, but a few months later, the mayor and the police chief went to check on a vicious dog repot, and both were nearly mauled...it was a pit....at the next meeting my old law was dusted off and put in effect. The mayor, who is 75, said he had never seen a dog act like that...it just went insane.
OmSigDAVID
 
  1  
Reply Sun 7 Nov, 2010 06:56 pm
@2PacksAday,
2PacksAday wrote:

Rational thought, I wish there were some way to teach that....maybe it's always been this way, but it seems that it's becoming rarer by the min.

I've always found my area to be fascinating in many aspects....psychologically, sociologically..etc, as this is a crossroads of sorts of the nation. Being from such a small closeknit community, I get to observe/study it with ease.

Clinical depression goes hand in hand with poverty....that friend in particular comes from a family that is often refered to as "dark clouds"....if one of them comes around they will most definitely rain on your parade.
Do u have an opinion of what 'd happen to them if thay hit big on the Mega MIllions ?????





David
msolga
 
  1  
Reply Sun 7 Nov, 2010 07:01 pm
@2PacksAday,
So when will the mayoral election be, 2Packs?
Soon, by the sounds of it.
Good luck.
It sounds like you'll be a very energetic & committed mayor!
OmSigDAVID
 
  0  
Reply Sun 7 Nov, 2010 07:02 pm
@2PacksAday,
2PacksAday wrote:
Yeah, difference of opinions....that's fairly rare too.

The biggest debate that I've ever been involved with, was about setting up a standard code for rental property, we have a few "slum lords" in town, and their rentals tend to look a bit shabby. This dragged on for several months, was passed, recended, passed again, then finally became, as they say "stuck in commitee"....or tabled indefinitely.

Another biggie, was a pit-bull ban....I was the only one for this law, it was my bill so to speak, and the other 4 council members were against me....they made jokes about how a poodle can also be vicious, and all the usual things that are said in that argument.....so I lost that one, but a few months later, the mayor and the police chief went to check on a vicious dog repot, and both were nearly mauled...it was a pit....at the next meeting my old law was dusted off and put in effect. The mayor, who is 75, said he had never seen a dog act like that...it just went insane.
If u r against Pit Bulls, will thay call u a racist ??





David
0 Replies
 
2PacksAday
 
  1  
Reply Sun 7 Nov, 2010 07:13 pm
@OmSigDAVID,
Hee....I actually had that written in a post but deleted it....if they were to somehow become filthy rich...I could see them moving back, building a huge castle in the center of town, and flinging dung at the rest of us from the parapets.
0 Replies
 
farmerman
 
  6  
Reply Mon 8 Nov, 2010 06:58 pm
Well, As I was suspecting, and only realized during the service, my childhood friend, Joel, had been using these kinds of stories as some kind of validation fo0r his own existence. I doctored up my story and, as per our priginal "pact" I was able to place the blame for the event upon him. A silly point really, since I added a postscript about how we to, as teeneagers , made this silly pact and now I was there to deliver on my half now that Joel was officially dead.

I added my postscript, said my adieus to his wife, who was part of Joels planning process, and left. It turned out that hed had asimilar stories offered up by other childhood friends. Most of those people also wanted to ask, "Whats the big deal with this ****?".
The big deal was that Joels life ws rather uneventful and these childhood tales were a way to swap "Army stories" in a formal venue. I felt a deep sorrow for Joel, especially to the fact that his own kids had nothing to add. (And one of the kids films documentaries).

I did speak a few moments with some of the other guests who were childhood friends and acquaintances. Hardly any of them rung an accord that wanted to make me rekindle an acquaintance.

QWe all had our lives going, some mor intereesting than others , but all important to our mates and kids (I WOULD hope).

I think Ive got some material for a short story. Im sure this has been done several times in the past but Ive just discovered a newish wrinkle trhat makesfor an interesting(at least to me) tale.

The hell of it was that I didnt make it to Joel's "Life Celebration" on Saturday. I left my notes with his one kid and said that"Hey, he was your dad. You should have something interesting to speak on to the assembly". Ya want to leave a fond memory in their minds"


Nope, I didnt make it to the life celebration. I celebrated life by driving all the way up to SPringfield MAss where my wife was in a Fibre show at the "Big E" in West SPringfield. We had a hell of a nice weekend and, while she was at her show, I got to visit the SMith College ARt Museum, a world class art collection. Its a small collection but a great one.

Get a good nights sleep Joel, Im sorry that I didnt give it my best. There was too much distance between us over the years.
edgarblythe
 
  2  
Reply Mon 8 Nov, 2010 07:11 pm
@farmerman,
Thanks, fm. That was a really good telling, with a great resolution.
George
 
  1  
Reply Mon 8 Nov, 2010 08:55 pm
@edgarblythe,
Echoing Edgar, helluva story.
Gave me a lot to think about.
farmerman
 
  1  
Reply Mon 8 Nov, 2010 08:58 pm
@George,
Not really. Joles life was kinda sad really. I gotta go ang hug my kids by e-mail (they will be having the last words over me, I hope Im worth a few)
0 Replies
 
2PacksAday
 
  1  
Reply Sat 20 Nov, 2010 02:30 am
@msolga,
Since FM has finished his journey....I probably would have shirked it myself....I'll answer your question.

April 5th , so I still have a bit over 4 months to go....but I will prob know by mid to late Jan.
0 Replies
 
 

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