@hawkeye10,
hawkeye10 wrote:
the answer is than none of us know this girl, so none of us can say. At 12 some girls have BF's and are having sex a lot and basically doing everything adult women do, some are still playing Barbies. THe question you should be asking is what signs should you be looking for that she is ready, and I dont have an answer for you.
For now hang out with her, have fun, watch and learn. I get worried when kids are in a hurry to grow up.
and in the next breath Hawkeye says
hawkeye10 wrote:
If 5% of 12 year olds are active, and a boys likes a certain 12 YO, I could not in good conscience tell him to resist trying for her if he wants her. The odds are high enough to make the effort worthwhile.
But use a condom.
This idea that most 12 year olds are still playing Barbies and no way interested in boys I have to think is 99% wishful thinking.
(you just couldn't resist the opportunity, could you HawkEye)
And then further quotes from a near 50 year old man on how to get condoms for kids.
Hawkeye – good conscience – you would need to have a conscience! Why would you encourage telling a young man who has asked this question
marilyn manson wrote:
i love a girl that is turning 12 anyway she’s not looking for that kind of relationship yet (and is still grossed out by the thought of it) when will she be interestd in that when shoud i tell her
to go for it but just makes sure he uses a condom. You tell him you don’t have an answer but then start peddling statistics that actually, 5% of 12 year olds want to have sex.
You are quite unbelievable.
Are you trying to rack this girl up to the rape thread you so enjoy, where of course you and your pathetic excuse with your brother-in-arms, will then make this 11 year old one of the rape statistics.
Clearly this 11 year old girl, about to turn 12 has told this boy that she is too young at the moment for a boyfriend, that it grosses her out and that she enjoys just friendship with him. Do NOT peddle your despicable “blessings” for sexual abuse and rape telling him he should not resist trying for her
if he wants her. "
The odds are high enough to make the effort worthwhile. "
His efforts would NOT be worthwhile. It is not about if he WANTS her. The girl is
11 years old, she has made it clear she does not want to be in relationships, she has said she is too young and she’s still playing with her Barbie dolls.
SHE HAS SAID NO ALREADY! His efforts and wants, if he took your deplorable advice, could mean she may become a rape or abuse victim. That is the world YOU live in Hawkeye - your BDSM world - that is not the world that most people live in. Are you trying to create another victim and then blame her at 11 years old? That this this young man ought to try coz the odds are in his favour that she may just want it, just make sure he uses a condom. <insert vomit emoticon>
The odds are too high for ruining two lives.
You are a disgusting excuse for a man Hawkeye.
......................................................................................................................................................
Marilyn Manson
Please read again what GreenWitch has said.
Green Witch wrote:
I understand you like this girl very much, but I think there is a big maturity difference in a 14 year old boy and a 12 year old girl. Most important, she has expressed that she is not interested. If you try to push her she will probably start to avoid you. You never want to make a girl feel pressured to do something she does not want to do, it makes them dislike and distrust you. Sometimes you just have to accept the fact that what you want is not what another person wants. You need to respect her feelings and look around for another possible candidate for your affections. Maybe in a few years she will change her mind, but for now you need to act maturely and move on.
You sound as tho you are really trying to think this through because you have feelings for this girl – so please don’t pressure her. Be her friend and let her grow up in her own time. She’s
11 right now and as she gets older and matures, her feelings about having a boyfriend will probably change. For now tho, just be her friend. 2-3 years is quite a big age difference in maturity levels and physically also. Good on you for asking advice and considering how best to deal with your feelings.
Please be wary of the internet tho. Some advice could get you into serious trouble and some people peddle their own agendas which, if taken on board and acted upon, could ruin yours, and others, futures. I have a 13.5 year old boy and, tho all young men mature on different timescales, he is more into playing rugby and messing about in the river with surf boards, but I know that before much longer his interest in girls is gonna take on a new level – he’s starting to ask lots of questions but he’s still at a the giggling stage of “those words”! He has very strong relationships/friendships with girls at and out of school, who are mostly older than him, but as yet is not expressing any interest in dating girls.
I reckon that you should keep your friend just as your friend until such time, if that happens, you are both at a similar maturity level to know whether or not you wanna go out together as boyfriend and girlfriend. Meantime, maybe see if there is someone a little closer to your age to date if the girl is saying she is interested at this point. Let her grow up in her own time and maybe find a girl who is interested in hanging out with you in the places that you both like to go and enjoys similar interests to you.
