I don't wanna go but feel like I gotta—

Damn. Now there's a visitation on Friday and it's my understanding that 'the family' present is expected to be there aaaall day. This really threw a crimp into things because I was hoping that Saturday would be it. But of course not!

I really don't want to do this all day visitation thing. And I'm not keen on riding in the family limo either. That feels somewhat disingenuous to me.

Is there any way for this madness NOT to have consequences and repercussions???

Get back to me quick. I'm out of here tomorrow. Thanks A2K.

a red dress?

I think you can excuse yourself from the visitation early. Think about how much time would work, e. g. for your remaning brother, add maybe an hour to that and consider it to be your upper limit. I think all-day is insane for such things as it is too much for people emotionally.

As for the limo, there are space constraints, yes? You can beg off if it looks like there isn't enough room.

I figured, 2 hours tops on the visitation. Because you know how that's going to go. People will be trooping in offering up condolences and just how long can you accept "I'm so sorry" with a straight face? If brother wants to stay, I can have someone else come pick me up. Or get on a bus.

But thanks jespah for the limo rationale. I can beg off whether there's enough room or not. My choice, right? I've never been big on all of that showy stuff anyway. My sister-in-law lives for it.

It was everything I hoped for and nothing I feared. The funeral was very, very showy but I was completely chilled out and even promised my sister-in-law that I would call her. We still have things to hash over and she owes me an apology for the things she said about me to other family members. It's the only way we can move forward.

My nephew promised he would call me.

Then I hung out with my girlfriend, the picnic was loads of fun and the next night we went to a festival in the park and used the free tickets I lucked up on to see Les McCann and Chaka Kahn. I'm still hoarse from partying way too much.

Drewdad, I guess I danced on his grave after all!

All good...

Congratulations!