4
   

The Hot Stove League

 
 
Region Philbis
 
  1  
Reply Tue 24 Feb, 2004 01:18 pm
understandable. the creature does have a rather large proboscis-like appendage.
0 Replies
 
Dartagnan
 
  1  
Reply Tue 24 Feb, 2004 02:05 pm
Re the Phanatic: Interesting, in light of what I read in the NY Times today about the not-too-distant past, when players' cocaine use was the main drug concern: "After all, the Pittsburgh mascot, the Pirate Parrot, was found to be a cocaine conduit between a dealer and players."
0 Replies
 
Region Philbis
 
  1  
Reply Tue 24 Feb, 2004 02:59 pm
i had no idea Shocked Exclamation
no doubt gave new meaning to pirating paraphernalia...
0 Replies
 
BillW
 
  1  
Reply Tue 24 Feb, 2004 03:18 pm
So that's the reason he was always carrying around a straw Cool
0 Replies
 
BillW
 
  1  
Reply Tue 24 Feb, 2004 04:39 pm
Hot off the press:

Quote:
Steinbrenner Buys Fenway -
Homeless Red Sox Cry Foul

Andy Borowitz

WEB EXCLUSIVE
Newsweek
Updated: 4:53 p.m. ET Feb. 24, 2004

Feb. 24 - George Steinbrenner's buying spree continued unabated today as the New York Yankees owner purchased Fenway Park, the legendary home of the arch-rival Boston Red Sox.

In buying Fenway out from under the Sox, Steinbrenner has left his Eastern Division rivals without a stadium for the first time in their history, jeopardizing the Red Sox' bid for the American League pennant. "It is hard to win a championship without pitching or hitting," says David Hastings, a sports historian at the University of Minnesota. "But it is virtually impossible to win without a stadium."

Red Sox owner John Henry, who spent most of the day scrambling to find a high school sandlot where his team might play the 2004 season, held an emotional press conference in Boston to denounce the big-spending Yankee honcho. "Damn you, George Steinbrenner, damn you!" swore Henry, shaking his fist violently.

But Steinbrenner's shopping day had barely begun. After closing his Fenway deal, the Yankees owner went on to outbid the Walt Disney Company for the legendary puppet characters, the Muppets. While Steinbrenner did not indicate what role the Muppet characters might play in the Yankee organization, his aggressive purchase of Kermit, Miss Piggy et al reinforced the impression in baseball circles that the Yankee owner is willing to buy anything that is not nailed down.

Having assumed the $250 million contract of third baseman Alex Rodriguez, however, Mr. Steinbrenner acknowledged that he might have to economize by outsourcing second base to India.

In other baseball news, North Korea's Kim Jung-Il revealed that he attempted to acquire A-Rod until he was told that A-Rod was not a piece of nuclear fuel.


http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/4364191/
0 Replies
 
Region Philbis
 
  1  
Reply Tue 24 Feb, 2004 04:50 pm
good stuff, billw!
ever read bill scheft in SI? same onionish sense of humor.
0 Replies
 
BillW
 
  1  
Reply Tue 24 Feb, 2004 06:01 pm
It still may happen - especially if the Sox win this year Smile
0 Replies
 
Slappy Doo Hoo
 
  1  
Reply Wed 25 Feb, 2004 09:13 am
Even though I love Nomar as a player, he came off like a baby when they interviewed him at spring training yesterday. The guy goes all season barely talking to the media, and once he finds out he was about to get traded, he comes out saying how much it hurt and how he wants to play for the sox.
0 Replies
 
Dartagnan
 
  1  
Reply Wed 25 Feb, 2004 10:42 am
Sounds like Steinbrenner could've written Nomar's script. I just hope he gets over it by opening day!
0 Replies
 
Region Philbis
 
  1  
Reply Wed 25 Feb, 2004 11:27 am
opening day 2005 @ yankee stadium:
"... batting 2nd and playing 2nd base, noooooo-marrrrr garciaparraaaaaaaaaaaa..."
0 Replies
 
Dartagnan
 
  1  
Reply Wed 25 Feb, 2004 11:37 am
Don't even joke about such a thing, Region!

Besides, I suspect The Boss will pursue starting pitchers next winter. The current staff is likely to come apart by mid-summer...
0 Replies
 
Region Philbis
 
  1  
Reply Wed 25 Feb, 2004 11:43 am
you're right, what was i thinking?
jeter would obviously have to move to 2nd.
0 Replies
 
Dartagnan
 
  1  
Reply Wed 25 Feb, 2004 04:15 pm
A-Rod seems to think he may not be booed as much when he comes to Seattle now that he plays for NYY. He's wrong--there are now two reasons to boo him...
0 Replies
 
Region Philbis
 
  1  
Reply Thu 26 Feb, 2004 07:48 am
texas, bahstin and seattle'll be all over him!

being booed on the road is apparently perceived by the players as a reluctant show of respect.
0 Replies
 
Dartagnan
 
  1  
Reply Thu 26 Feb, 2004 10:21 am
The great ones say booing inspires them...
0 Replies
 
Region Philbis
 
  1  
Reply Thu 26 Feb, 2004 11:07 am
sheffield was on ESPNNEWS last night, vehement that the only business he did with balco was vitamins.

maybe "vitamins" is another way of saying steroids?
0 Replies
 
BillW
 
  1  
Reply Thu 26 Feb, 2004 11:39 am
Them fortified kind..... Smile
0 Replies
 
Slappy Doo Hoo
 
  1  
Reply Thu 26 Feb, 2004 11:48 am
Yes. Because you need to hire a professional assistant to buy Vitamin C from.
0 Replies
 
Dartagnan
 
  1  
Reply Thu 26 Feb, 2004 11:51 am
Really. To think all these years I've been gulping down a multi-vitamin without the advice of a professional trainer. No wonder my athletic career never took off...
0 Replies
 
Region Philbis
 
  1  
Reply Fri 27 Feb, 2004 11:31 am
cub fans destroy ball that killed playoff hopes
http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/news/story?id=1745382
http://espn-att.starwave.com/media/mlb/2004/0226/photo/cubsball_hi.jpg
The threadbare remains of the baseball deflected
by a fan in the Cubs' Game 6 loss to the Marlins
rest inside a case moments after being blown up
Thursday in Chicago.
0 Replies
 
 

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