Tue 19 May, 2009 12:21 am
My husband and I got married about 4 months ago. He and I live in differnt countries. We are of different nationality. He has been in touch with his friend, female friend, since before we knew each other. Our situation is complicated because I have to work in my country for a while because I got a schlarship from my government. And he's not ready to move and live with me yet. He was badly abused by his mother so physical touch and presence are so significant to him. Our long distance makes him frustrated sometimes.
Recently he said that he developed a profound connection with this female friend and he admitted she's attractive to him. And he told me that she's attracted to him and has strong feelings for him. He said she said she felt bad because she didn't want to mess his life up. But he said that he's going through tough times (he lost his job 10 months ago and still can't find a job). His friends said that he should move to live with me and said I was very patient with him. He told me that he wanted to be honest with me by telling about how they felt for each other. He said he wanted to have some kind of relationship with her, closer relationship, like seeing each other, holding her or maybe intimate relationship. But he's not leaving me and will move to live with me. She's not trying to take him from me. Her family was broken, too. And he said he wanted to show her love she never felt. I really hate what he want to do and I am hurt badly. What do you suggest?
It sounds like you want to save him. You can't. Unless this guy has a lot of money saved he is a deadbeat, and he is hurting you, and he is not even with you. Throw him back, find a better class of guy.
I rather like that expression. Yeah, throw him back.
A husband isn't supposed to be sexually intimate with any women other than his wife. You need to talk to your husband and let him know it isn't all about him, that your needs are just as important.
As Liz Lemon might say... "That's a dealbreaker!"
Shut it down...