2
   

Friendly Freaks Group (UK)

 
 
msolga
 
  1  
Reply Wed 24 Mar, 2010 05:05 pm
@edgarblythe,
Hello, Endy

Like edgar, I miss you here.

I miss talking to you, too.

I miss catching each new poem you've written.

I'm hoping this spring will be a gentle, peaceful & fruitful time for you.

You take good care,

Love,
Olga
0 Replies
 
Izzie
 
  1  
Reply Thu 25 Mar, 2010 06:32 pm
@Endymion,



((((e))))
0 Replies
 
Endymion
 
  4  
Reply Tue 20 Apr, 2010 03:37 am

I can't get into my e-mail yet - as i've been off line so long i've forgotten my password. So if you've e-mailed me - sorry, i am trying to catch up.

Just want to tell you i'm still here. I've been away - getting my head sorted out

I thought about people here a lot while i was gone.

I missed talking to you - but I have been in no fit state to be a part of anything. Today I'm just saying hello, hope you are doing ok

hope to speak to you soon

regards

endy
Tai Chi
 
  1  
Reply Tue 20 Apr, 2010 12:57 pm
@Endymion,
Glad you dropped in, endy, and hope to see you back soon.
0 Replies
 
Joeblow
 
  1  
Reply Tue 20 Apr, 2010 04:52 pm
@Endymion,
Hi Endy!

We've missed you.

I have no news.

Well actually I have lots of news, but it's pretty mundane, so never mind for now.

Freak, out.
0 Replies
 
Izzie
 
  1  
Reply Tue 20 Apr, 2010 05:07 pm
@Endymion,
we've missed you too Endy

Peace

x
0 Replies
 
ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Tue 20 Apr, 2010 05:13 pm
@Endymion,
Oh my.

So good to see your avatar again.

Weird how people we only know here become part of what goes on in our lives. I can't find a new vegetable source or a new root vegetable recipe without thinking, "Endy'd think this was sooooo good".

I hope you are well, and feel at peace.
0 Replies
 
Endymion
 
  2  
Reply Thu 22 Apr, 2010 05:11 am

I was out all day yesterday, visiting my neighbours.
It felt good to be able to do that again" I haven't for quite some time.
It was a very peaceful day.
Walking home I thought about this thread.
Your posts mean a great deal to me. These and the ones posted while I was gone.
I do regret that I didn't get a chance to say goodbye before I left. It just didn't happen like that. And i'm sorry that I haven't been around. I missed Olga's birthday (happy VERY belated birthday, Olga, all the best) " and I didn't get to say Happy New Year to any of you. So... Happy 2010!

Here's to you all "

Peace
Endy
edgarblythe
 
  3  
Reply Thu 22 Apr, 2010 05:51 am
endy
I've often thought of you but repressed urges to email my concern. I felt you would return when and if the time was right. I hope you pursue your writing and make progress. I hope your life is on track. I want you to realize how special we here consider that you are.
0 Replies
 
msolga
 
  1  
Reply Fri 23 Apr, 2010 04:17 am
@Endymion,
Endorsing edgar's words to to you, Endy.
You are indeed very special to us.
Not to worry about not having the chance to say your farewells before. It's OK. I know you would have had your reasons. Enough said.
Anyway, it is just lovely that you're back!!! Very Happy


(ps Don't worry about my birthday. When's yours? That's what I want to know! Smile )
0 Replies
 
Izzie
 
  1  
Reply Fri 23 Apr, 2010 05:36 pm
@Endymion,
Honoured to have you here ((e)) Very Happy

Love and peace to you. x
Endymion
 
  2  
Reply Wed 28 Apr, 2010 07:55 am
@Izzie,
Blimey Izzie - I got a bit carried away writing to you. (Let me apologise in advance if this is inappropriate, but something tells me i should post it)





Izzie

I know things are pretty tough for you right now and i don't have any way of offering you support, other than to share a personal observation with you. (If i can find the words - and judging by the way my writing has been going lately, i wouldn't bank on it. )

I accept that i don't really have the right to advise anyone, but on the other hand, saying nothing feels wrong, so I'm going to risk it.

It's about creativity. (And really, NOT advice, but my own pondering - something i've been looking at for a while now).

(And I'm only going to share this with you, because i know you understand my odd ways of seeing things - it's what helps you be a photographer, right?)


Well, to start with, I have spent many hours recently, typing, deleting, cursing, but I am stuck like a tree in mud with regards my political thread. I have so much i feel should be said - but I don't have the brain, or the skill to verbalise it in such a way as to be acceptable. (Nor the heart to try).

Remember when we briefly spoke of losing faith?

Most of what i decide is instinctive. What i feel about right and wrong, for example - most of it is instinctive. And that's not good enough when it comes to politics, apparently.

So I'm stuck, bogged down with too much information and not enough brain-power/skill/wit to engage with it.

I think that when anyone feels very strongly about something they can't change, and all the many aspects of the problem lie in layers stacked up inside them, it can leave them completely, utterly choked with frustration, hopelessness and anger (at themselves, for not finding the solution and seeing it through.)

But i think that when you've run out of ideas - that is the time to stop searching for the answer.

I believe it was a Chinese fellow who first said, 'when you don't know what to do, do nothing.'

Maybe, when you can't get to the mountain, you have to wait for the summer. Sometimes, trying to change a situation is like trying to change the laws of gravity. A person can soldier on, but personally, i just keep falling off the side of the mountain over and over again, because I'm too suborn to accept that climbing to the top and hoisting the flag isn't my responsibility - or even a possibility. (Yet).

I don't know the ins and outs of your situation, Izzie and if i'm honest, i don't feel it's my business, but I do care and so i need to say - I believe that sometimes it pays to walk away from an unmoveable object and focus on something else entirely. Something inside your own personal world, even for a short time.

For me, it has been writing a short story about a horse. I'm serious.

Thinking about the collection of photographs you have, photography has always seemed to me to be about detail. Which makes me think of 'meditation.'

I've learned something about British soldiers during WWI, who used creativity (in the trenches) as a way of coping with their surroundings. And it really helped. (maybe you already know all this, but in case you don't) They made postcards, toys, knitted garments, jewellery, they painted, wrote poetry, made sculptures and so on.

They focused in on the small details (a kind of meditation) and were able to function more calmly as a result, during the difficult times. As well as the practical, mental health (and monetary) benefits - spiritually, by expressing their creativity, they were able to push back a bit of the exhaustion of their surroundings.

You know, the last photograph you posted here struck me right away. (For me) it seemed to sum up both the beauty and cruelty of winter

(/nature/life.)


http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC09879.jpg



I know that when life feels cruel, people often tell me to look at the beauty in it. and I think, 'Hey, wait - i feel the beauty, as painfully as i feel the cruelty'
The two things are almost the same, aren't they? If i stand looking out at a beautiful landscape, I do sometimes feel pain. I don't know why exactly - I have my ideas about that, but they're not for now.

I just want to explain, I'm not saying the 'beauty' of nature can miraculously help a person feel better about an agonising situation ( i leave that for others to say)- The soldiers in WWI proved that you don't need beautiful surroundings to be inspired - I'm talking about expression, using nature (photography) or anything else, as a representation. (sorry, if that isn't clear).

Your photography expresses (to me) much more than you probably realise.
It's important work and not only that -its a way of documenting how you feel (If you look at it that way).

Maybe one day you might show these photographs to someone you can not express your feelings to right now (for whatever reason) and say, ' hey look - this is what i was feeling then.'



That's all I'm going to say -just passing on what i've discovered myself, through writing.
Even if the thought of turning your mind onto something artistic/creative seems absurd right now -- I just want you to know, it's a huge part of what you're about - your creativity. I mean- at the end of the day. You wouldn't do it, otherwise. That's what i believe, anyway. That individually, we are drawn to channel our feelings into creative ways of expressing our (verbally) inexpressible pain, and our frustration at being 'powerless' in so many ways. And by 'we' I mean the human race.

That's the thing to really remember, Izzie - You are not alone


Good Luck
I hope i haven't offended you by saying too much, here. I just want to offer help in any way i can


PS - have you seen the moon, Izzie? I watched it for a long time last night. Wow

peace
e
Endymion
 
  4  
Reply Thu 29 Apr, 2010 06:04 am
.
Dandelion Invasion


I see you've crept closer while I was away
I see you've slipped quietly inside the gate
The house is surrounded
You've all grown so tall
And so very pretty
I bow to you all



Endymion 2010





a really freakish poem that
.
djjd62
 
  1  
Reply Thu 29 Apr, 2010 06:06 am
@Endymion,
nice, love dandelions, get a good crop every spring & summer
Endymion
 
  1  
Reply Thu 29 Apr, 2010 06:10 am

Great new signatures Edgar and Olga - I'm impressed!

I'm going over to the R thread now to drop off a couple of angry anti-war poems i wrote a while ago now. I have to post them. I can't not do so.

Oh well...
0 Replies
 
Endymion
 
  1  
Reply Thu 29 Apr, 2010 06:16 am
@djjd62,


i only eat their leaves - they don't seem to mind
And no delivery charge

djjd62
 
  1  
Reply Thu 29 Apr, 2010 06:21 am
@Endymion,
we drive our neighbours nuts, we don't use any lawn care treatment, and the folks on either side spend a fortune on fertilizer and weed control, all the time our dandelions are blowing all over their lawns Twisted Evil
Endymion
 
  1  
Reply Thu 29 Apr, 2010 06:56 am
@djjd62,

Thanks dj
i haven't laughed like that for a while
0 Replies
 
Izzie
 
  4  
Reply Thu 29 Apr, 2010 05:07 pm
@Endymion,
http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02522.jpg

not able to verbalise

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02526.jpg


http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02549.jpg

layers stacked up inside

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02550.jpg

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC01544.jpg

choked with frustration

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02554.jpg

hopelessness and anger (at themselves, for not finding the solution and seeing it through.)


http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02555.jpg

time to stop searching for the answer.

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02543.jpg


trying to change a situation is like trying to change the laws of gravity.


walk away from an unmoveable object and focus on something else entirely. Something inside your own personal world, even for a short time.

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC01534.jpg

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC01536.jpg

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC01538.jpg

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC01541.jpg

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC01550.jpg

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC01551.jpg

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC01556.jpg


http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02556.jpg
http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02561.jpg

exhaustion of their surroundings.

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02538.jpg

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02540.jpg

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02546.jpg

i feel the beauty, as painfully as i feel the cruelty'

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02569.jpg

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02575.jpg

The two things are almost the same, aren't they? Yes…yes

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02625.jpg

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02610.jpg

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02613.jpg

If i stand looking out at a beautiful landscape, I do sometimes feel pain. I don't know why exactly - I have my ideas about that, but they're not for now.


documenting how you feel (If you look at it that way).

inexpressible pain

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02531.jpg

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02637.jpg

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02639.jpg

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02641.jpg

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02642.jpg

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02647.jpg

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02650.jpg

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02660.jpg

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02656.jpg


http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02640.jpg

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02656.jpg

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02677.jpg


You are not alone

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/DSC02535.jpg

Thanku.

PS - have you seen the moon, Izzie? I watched it for a long time last night. Wow

I saw it with you ((e)) " it was beautiful. Moving.


<I dunno how you did that... but thanku>



msolga
 
  1  
Reply Thu 29 Apr, 2010 05:17 pm
@Endymion,
I loved this, Endy.

So light & whimsical & spring-like!

Lovely.

(Now I'm looking for dandelion salad recipes to post here!)

Quote:
Dandelion Invasion


I see you've crept closer while I was away
I see you've slipped quietly inside the gate
The house is surrounded
You've all grown so tall
And so very pretty
I bow to you all



Endymion 2010


`
 

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