Friendly Freaks Group (UK)

Dear Olga - sorry to hear about your loss over the holiday
I don't think you will read this any time soon - but I am thinking of you

must have been something in the air

hoping you're feeling

not good, not strong, not anything in particular

feeling

Hi ehBeth - good to see you

hope life is treating you well

endy

I love the photo you posted Endy...

thinking of you - be well and hope you are feeling....too

love to you (((((e))))) xxxx

(((((Endy)))))x

(((((Endy)))) - thinking of you, love.

Be well x

Hey Endy

I do hope you have been able to go out in the sunshine and maybe walk in the woods

Thinking of you this Spring

miss you ((e)) x

Hey ((e)) - hoping life is being gentle with you love



x

Once again, I am staggered by your brilliant photographic output Izzie.

Endy
If you are reading - My best thoughts are with you this day. I hope you are making progress as a writer.

Hey Endy - thinking of you today. Wondering if it is a cool afternoon in a forest. Wondering if the early harvest is good.

Hi ((e)) - thinking of you xxxx

Thinking a lot about you lately.

The changes in the weather - the seasonal root veggie harvest beginning - getting a camera out again regularly - attending outdoor concerts - happenings in the M.E. - how is Endymion doing

Well, this isn't going to be easy to say.


When my internet connect went kaput six months ago – so did I.

The sorry truth is that I've never stopped being suicidal. Not since I was a kid. It's a constant battle and one which I refuse to draw anybody else into.

I ended up in hospital and when I came back and my connection was fixed, I couldn't go on line. I didn't feel strong enough.

I thought about you all and wanted to make contact – but I just couldn't do it. I didn't have the words. And there was a part of me that said, 'Leave them alone.' Because at that point I didn't know if I was going to make it. That's the truth.

Whatever happens, I want you to know – everyone who has been here for me in the past, that I will always be grateful and respectful of you and care about how you're doing.

With my writing, my coming to terms with things, I haven' t given up. I haven't.

I'm getting stronger all the time.

I hope I get the chance to prove it to you.

I'm not asking for anyone to forgive, but I am determined to come back here and contribute as much as I am able. Don't feel there is any need to reply to me. I understand how frustrating it all must be. If I've hurt you, I am truly sorry.

I think closing down the death diary was one of the biggest mistakes I have ever made in my life. It was an outlet I wasn't ready to give up.

I've made a lot of mistakes. I shall try and rectify some of them.

Wishing you all well

Peace
endy

Endy, what you need is a wonderful piece of writing that glitters. You will be fine, dear man. I sense it.

Did you know that creative people have those problems?

write

write when you can

your words are beautiful and strong, even when they are difficult

I'm looking over some hills with early autumn colour changes. I hope there is something as lovely for you to see and walk through today.

gentle breezes, endy.

you are stronger than you realize.

No pressure from us, endy. Just welcoming and love.