My "boyfriend" is rubbish. Should I dump him?

@Dorothy Parker,

DP, Nice to see you around here again. I agree with having a talk first. Maybe he doesn't see things the same way you do. If the talk doesn't go well then it's best to move on.

1 Reply

@Dorothy Parker,

Does your fella know that you're bored, that you feel lonely, that you feel that you're there for his convenience.

As I read your initial post, it seems that you know what's reasonable to expect from a relationship and that your fella either doesn't know, doesn't care, or has forgotten. It doesn't sound like he's even following the common courtesies he'd give a stranger.

Is he worth talking to about your unhappiness? if so, talk to him. If not, don't bother - other than to get your key from him.

2 Replies

@ehBeth,

Then what?

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Dorothy - you said you "dread" doing what you have to do.

Are you afraid of being alone?
Are you dreading going out "there" again to look for a new love?

It all sounds like an energy thing. You may be depressed. That's why you stay in a depressing situation. (the old familiar shoe, and all that)

Get a physical and start exercising. Before you take on this "mission" to free yourself from this dead weight, you'd better be stronger than you seem.

Good luck and don't wait too long.

Life is short.

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@sullyfish6,

Hi sullyfish. An unfortunate choice of username I would have said. Hardly magnetic or spellbinding like, say, The Pentacle Queen.

But you have a good angle on the difficulty we are herein engaged with.

1 Reply

@spendius,

Facking A, Spendy. You should go in for counselling work, pro bono.

1 Reply

@McTag,

The trouble with counselling work professionally is the temptation to counsel in order to cause a need for more counselling. It's irresistable I believe.

I'm not in any need to stoop to such mean behaviour but let it be said that I might if I was in such a need.

1 Reply

@martybarker,

Hi martybarker. Good to hear from you too and I hope you are well.

I know talking would help but I find it very very difficult and I know he does too. But I am going to try to be more honest and open (in a nice way).

Thank you.

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@ehBeth,

ehBeth, no I don't think he is aware of how I feel. I am thinking that maybe I am the problem expecting him to know how I want him to behave.

He doesn't have a key :-) thank God.

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@sullyfish6,

sullyfish, that sounds like really good advice. Yes I'm afraid of being alone and starting all over again with somebody new. Thank you for your reply.

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@spendius,

spendius you are so consistently strange and I like it. Even when you are being mean. Still don't know what you're getting at but thanks anyway.

1 Reply

@Dorothy Parker,

What I'm getting at DP is that your positive factors are the determinant of any stable niche you get yourself into. As we don't know what they are other than the basic component, or even if you have any, we are unable to advise you in this matter apart from explaining the broad principle on which "bagging off" works leaving aside short term activities.

1 Reply

@spendius,

Oh! That applies to men as well only with more severity due to their lack of the basic component.

I will add that the ladies on here who have advised you should steer well clear of relationship counselling. They are more interested in writing their own CVs.

1 Reply

@spendius,

Are you saying that all men lack the basic component?

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@Dorothy Parker,

Well-yes actually.

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@spendius,

I can see now why you didn't understand my previous posts.

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@spendius,

If we men had the basic component I think we might never get out of bed.

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@spendius,

Just say FANNY.

1 Reply

@Dorothy Parker,

I'm a profession man DP. We use technical terms.

1 Reply

@spendius,

Americans don't know what fannies are. Although they think they do.

1 Reply

My "boyfriend" is rubbish. Should I dump him?

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