Bras

And a deep, seductive, throaty voice said, "hello there, Joe.........peel me a grape? Come up some time and see me......when women go wrong, men go right after them.............Goodness had nothing to do with it, dearie.....chemistry's a wonderful thing, but I know a couple of druggists that never made a dime 'til Prohibition............you wouldn't be of much USE to me dead.........I feel like a million tonight, but one at a time......................................

Apparently Joe was to be seduced by the famous Clique Kitty.

He turned to look at her. She had a face that would stop a clock, a body built like a brick shithouse and, in her right hand, a book of famous quotations.
"So you're not Clique Kitty." said Joe.
"How did you know?," purred the vixen leaning on the doorjamb.

Man, lookit all these doors, there must be hundreds off this one hallway. Risotto by BBB, another one about cats, oh - one I started about diarh - oh! Wait, that light - a door's open. Heeeyyyy, I think it's the bra thread. When ever I see this thread I want to take my bra off {slip slip stretch pull, voila!}..... ooooho!

What's this? Is that Lola, it must be, Those are the most recognizable legs in the whole building. And.... and.... who is that leaning into the door frame? ............. oh my, I errr..... I'm so embarrassed. Leave it to me to stumble into this. Maybe I can get...this...remaining under..... wire ... (ungh) out of my lopsided bra..... AH! And now, maybe I can pick this back entrance into the room...... {poke, wiggle, click}.

Littlek falls into the room, stands up and brushes herself off.... Hi Eva, Hi Suzette!

oh my I'm gunna have sweet dreams tonight

good night husker........

Mmmm, num num...whipped cream. Hold the bowl still, Joe.

(spying large blue kielbasa)...Slappy's been here?

In the cruel light after Beaujolais Nouveau release day, cav wonders how he woke up next to Slappy, and can't figure out when we stopped talking about bras....

Standing in the middle of the virtual room Joe sees that the walls are hung with row upon row of bras. Thousands of them, mostly beiges and whites, but also voyage blue, tea rose, black, whisper pink and nude (which looked a lot like, well, not any skin he had ever seen on a human woman.) The bras hang from the ceiling like stalagmites and are heaped in piles on the floor and tables like stalactites (Where is that Clique Kitty, now that I need her, Joe thought.) There's boxes and bales of brasseries everywhere. Even the ones Joe thought he had forgotten.

"Hi, Lillian Russell here to talk about the 'Cross your heart bra.' (Pointing to the half mannequin with the brassiere strapped across it.) See how it lifts and separates?" Joe looked. Yes, it looked like it did lift and separate. "Hey, buster!" Miss Russell growled ''Watch the robe! Or are you trying to say we are going to have six more weeks of winter??"

Joe turned away and ran right into a giant display of French push-up bras, or maybe they weren't, maybe they were maternity bras, he didn't know anymore. The room began to spin.
"This can't be happening" Joe moaned, "This is some kind of nightmare! This place, this place is full of underwires and no wires and racerbacks and pads and shaping demis, crossback, two strap one strap no strap and I'm an ass man!!"

Wow, Joe, you know a lot more about bras than I do.

(I do quality research)

Methinks he has been googling.

No, I've been oogling.

In the movie Cold Comfort Farm (a video I highly recommend) there's a character who collects corsets.......it's a great metaphor

Joe, did I mention I have a round 38" ass with firm, plump cheeks with legs that reach the floor... and I'm waiting for you... :wink:

Close your eyes, close the door,
You don't have to worry any more.
I'll be your baby tonight.

Shut the light, shut the shade,
You don't have to be afraid.
I'll be your baby tonight.

Well, that mockingbird's gonna sail away,
We're gonna forget it.
That big, fat moon is gonna shine like a spoon,
But we're gonna let it,
You won't regret it.

Kick your shoes off, do not fear,
Bring that bottle over here.
I'll be your baby tonight.



Cav, how could you wake up with SlappyDooHoo? Something about clowns sticking together?

So, Huskie, how were your dreams? Were they sweet? hmmmmm?

I am wearing my cross your balls jock today....it lifts 'em and separates them..

OMG!!!! My dreams lastnight!! PHEW!!!!! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Suzette and Lola!
Oh My Oh My Oh My! :wink: :wink:

I cannot talk about it here. But a song comes to mind:
Foreigner
Feels Like The First Time

I would climb any mountain, sail across the stormy sea
If that's what it takes me baby, to show how much you mean to me
And I guess that it's just the woman in you, that brings out the man in me
I know I can't help myself, you're all in the world to me

It feels like the first time, feels like the very first time
It feels like the first time, it feels like the very first time

Hmm...can't post the dirty poem again, but here is another piece from the lovely Maggie Estep without bad words:

I am THE SEX GODDESS OF THE WESTERN HEMISPHERE
so don't mess with me
I've got a big bag full of SEX TOYS
and you can't have any
'cause they're all mine
'cause I'm
the SEX GODDESS OF THE WESTERN HEMISPHERE.

"Hey," you may say to yourself,
"who the hell's she tryin' to kid,
she's no sex goddess,"
But trust me,
I am
if only for the fact that I have
the unabashed gall
to call
myself a SEX GODDESS,
I mean, after all,
it's what so many of us have at some point thought,
we've all had someone
who worshipped our filthy socks
and barked like a dog when we were near
giving us cause
to pause and think: You know, I may not look like much
but deep inside, I am a SEX GODDESS.

Only
we'd never come out and admit it publicly
well, you wouldn't admit it publicly
but I will
because I am
THE SEX GODDESS OF THE WESTERN HEMISPHERE.

I haven't always been
a SEX GODDESS
I used to be just a mere mortal woman
but I grew tired of sexuality being repressed
then manifest
in late night 900 number ads
where 3 bodacious bimbettes
heave cleavage into the camera's winking lens and sigh:

"Big Girls oooh, Bad Girls oooh, Blonde Girls oooh,
you know what to do, call 1-900-UNMITIGATED BIMBO ooooh."

Yeah
I got fed up with the oooh oooh oooh oooh oooh
I got fed up with it all
so I put on my combat boots
and hit the road with my bag full of SEX TOYS
that were a vital part of my SEX GODDESS image
even though I would never actually use
my SEX TOYS
'cause my being a SEX GODDESS
it isn't a SEXUAL thing
it's a POLITICAL thing
I don't actually have SEX, no
I'm too busy taking care of
important SEX GODDESS BUSINESS,
yeah,
I gotta go on The Charlie Rose Show
and MTV and become a parody
of myself and make
buckets full of money off my own inane brand
of self-righteous POP PSYCHOLOGY
because my pain is different
because I am a SEX GODDESS
and when I talk,
people listen
why ?
Because, you guessed it,
I AM THE SEX GODDESS OF THE WESTERN HEMISPHERE
and you're not.

A cross-your-balls jockstrap? Geez, BPB, that sounds painful!

why should you girls have all the fun?

Well, if you insist...we could always separate them for you...

Didn't realize you were into S&M, Bear. Hey Deb, Fearless Leader...we gotta volunteer for our training games...over here!!!