My daughter the loud talker or how to quiet her?

Obvious question first -- have you had her hearing tested lately?

I'm now a too-soft talker because I remain self-conscious about being a too-loud talker when I was losing my hearing.

We haven't actually - it has been about 6 months since she has been to the doctors. I thought of that, but it doesn't seem at least on the surface she has any problem hearing - especially hearing things you don't want her too.

Talk to her really softly.

Works with Yaya when she gets excited and starts to yell.

I think every parent runs into this at some point. The whole "inside voice vs. outside voice" thing. I did the same sort of thing as Drewdad suggested. The louder she talked the quieter I responded. It helps if you explain to them the whole concept of inside vs. outside. After a bit all you have to do it look at them calmly and quietly say "inside voice...". They catch on.

(I do have a sister that is 50 years old and still hasn't caught on though! )

That's what I'm afraid of.

Useful term--said in dripping, sweet tones:

Ooooh! Little Miss Leatherlungs.

(These days you might say "Ms".

Does she drone on constantly on inane subjects just to be the center of attention? If so, then maybe it's more than a hearing problem, and she could be very insecure.

Duct tape . . .

No - just whatever she is talking about. MOM MAY I HAVE SOME WATER PLEASE? When you are directly in front of her. It isn't anything she says - she just talks LOUD.

PAY ATTENTION TO ME MOMMY

This is out of my realm. I was shy violet at least into a few years after I started to go to work, at sixteen after school, so, let's say I just really started to think and talk in any discernible way, around twenty. I had read a lot, but not talked all that much with others. (A lively workplace did wonders.)

But I've no experience with loud children. I immediately sympathize, but have no answers. Although, I do pick up another thing, Linkat, and I don't mean to offend ---

but always being polite is not one's main recourse. I've wrestled with this, and at my age now I am way over nice. Perhaps too over, I'm working on it.

One needs not to be polite when faced with rape or other violent maneuver. Major politeness in that circumstance is not good, at least usually. Not that you think so, but if politeness is the main deal...

But also in some ordinary conversations, dealing with nice is dealing with vapor wrapped thickets.
Well, you know all that, I think, that a child needs to learn to stand up. You stand up just fine and I presume you can teach your children to.

The one child I had any real guidance towards was avid for straight talk, and I gave it to her in every instance, though not with all I knew, tempered it re her questions.

Constant reminders, "Use your inside voice." and refusal to hear bellowed comments or requests will work eventually.

Gentle teasing is no bad idea, either.

We love the gentle teasing - it goes along with calling her stinky when she dumps perfume over her head.

She is really a sweet heart to be honest with you. She just forgets to stop talking so loud. To top it off she has a deep voice especially for such a little girl. Probably why the teacher finds it so amusing she talks so loud rather than annoying - cute sweet little girl with a loud deep voice.

Partly it could be when she gets so excited - can't keep the excitement out so it is loud. She will be playing a pretend game with her sister - house or something - her sister will be right next to her and she will yell loudly while playing - but for most people whatever she is saying is used in normal conversation levels.

I'm with soz... get her hearing tested at an Audiology clinic. My daughter had the same problem and it turned out that she had water in her ears since she'd caught a mild form of pneumonia when she was 3 months old. They put tubes in and she was fine, gradually reducing her volume.

If that turns out not to be the problem, maybe you could tape record or videotape her so she can see what she sounds like. Nothing like a little reality to point out the not-so-obvious.

has she perhaps noticed that speaking loudly will get someone's attention quickly ?
does anyone in the family , any friend , neighbour speak loudly ?
perhaps you might ask her if she feels that she has to speak loudly to get anyone's attention .
you might then explain that speaking softly will get her the same attention ... and prove it to her .
to some extent our behaviour adjusts to the people we are with and how they react to us .
btw i have noticed that TV ads are usually played at a higher volume than the show that's being shown - those advertising whizkids seem to think that they can get our attention by cranking up the volume - i hit the mute button :wink: .
hbg

Hi Linkat

I know your last post was last year, but I am having the same problem with my 5 year old daughter, in that she talks VERY LOUDLY and I was wondering if you ended up having your daughter's hearing tested and what the outcome was. Her teacher is always commenting on how she is the loudest kid in school and she YELLS when she is sitting right beside me and we are the only people in the room. She was always a shy kid until she started school this year, but has always been loud. It's really getting annoying since her older sister is the complete opposite and I am forever telling her to speak up. Any advice????

Hi Linkat

I know your last post was last year, but I am having the same problem with my 5 year old daughter, in that she talks VERY LOUDLY and I was wondering if you ended up having your daughter's hearing tested and what the outcome was. Her teacher is always commenting on how she is the loudest kid in school and she YELLS when she is sitting right beside me and we are the only people in the room. She was always a shy kid until she started school this year, but has always been loud. It's really getting annoying since her older sister is the complete opposite and I am forever telling her to speak up. Any advice????

No we didn't get her hearing testing - I don't remember if they did this in school with all the kids. But it never appears as if she has a hearing issue - she is just loud. We are learning to live with it, but do remind her when it is not appropriate to talk so loud. Her older sister too is the opposite too quiet. The one positive is her teacher tells us she loves my daughter's voice. She said her daughter as a child was loud too. Her teacher does not mind in that my daughter is quiet (does not talk) in class when she is not supposed to.

my 5 year old son is the same he is known as the pre school clown as he is full on he is so loud and never takes a breath talking i have tried for the last year with inside and outside voice and it doesnt seem 2 work on the plus side i have a 7 week old son who will be a deep sleeper as he has to get use to his brothers voice