ehBeth wrote:Chai wrote:ehBeth wrote:Doowop wrote:Oi, have you got kids? I bet not!
Chai doesn't have kids. Wanna make something of it?
doowop was addressing that to nimh....
that was my point
that doowop was throwing the 'got kids' thing into the equation. it's irrelevant.
Quite a statement there.
Do you honestly think that an adult with no children could really, fully identify with the gut churning fear and panic that a parent has when a child of theirs "goes missing" for a short while, for instance? No way, unless it involved a child that they knew very well, like a nephew or niece etc, but then they would be, in effect, playing the role of a "parent" at the time.
Both of mine, on a few occasions during their early years, went awol for periods of time (just like most kids do) and I've never experienced such dread.
One was due back at 4pm on a Sunday from a friend's house about four doors away and a short walk of about 30 yards (no road crossing involved). Up until then (she was nine or so) she was as good as gold and totally punctual.
4pm came and went and my wife went up to get her about ten minutes later. She was back in an instant, saying that our daughter wasn't there and that she'd already left for home at 4pm.
I was out on the streets in an instant, in almost a blind panic. I went to two other addresses of her nearby friends, with no luck. She was by then twenty five minutes overdue and the police were called. I have never, ever felt such a feeling of blind panic, and hope to god that I'll never feel that again.
As I saw the police car coming down the road, my smiling daughter came round the corner on the back of another friend's new bike. She'd met her on the walk back at 4pm and had gone for a little test drive without telling us.
The police took it all in good part and were pleased that all had come to nowt, but I will never forget that feeling.
I say now that although a childless adult would feel horror and dread in such a situation, until it's happened to their own child, they don't know the meaning of those two words.
Further to this, I feel that a parent (especially one who has been through an awol situation) can
really and utterly identify with the feelings of a couple that actually has their child go missing, more than most childless adults. Most parents reading this will know exactly what I'm trying to say.
A childless adult is someone who is usually responsible and will show concern in such a "bus" situation. n adult who is a parent would show similar concern, I feel, as a childless adult if such a thing happened to someone else's lad.
But the actual parent of the child, at that precise moment in time, shows a whole different level of protection when it comes to a sudden, unexpected and wholly weird incident which could even remotely pose a threat.
So to me (and obviously Chai) there is
very much the Lion/ess cub thing going on. It's all very well to sit down here at the PC, calmly read this thread like responsible adults and stroke our chins while we think up a very reasonable adult version of how we'd respond. This "incident" happened like
bang, there and in your face. Now, you have a maximum of one second to react.
I still say now, if it happened to me and I didn't have time to stroke my chin over a Latte, I'd have proverbially punched his lights out.
By the way, I love in a small city, where I would imagine that the likelihood of having your car wheels stolen or someone shaking you by the hand and saying good morning runs at about 50/50.
I'm not mentally thinking quiet rural scenario here, where everyone knows everyone, as some of you may be.