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Wed 2 May, 2007 03:07 am
Something just popped up in my head (reading all the threads on privacy)...
Recently I was a bit annoyed, when a friend told me, she got my easter parcel, but her son opened it while she was at work, and by the time she got home, all the chocolate had been eaten out of it!
The parcel was clearly addressed to HER, and obviously the contents were for her, too.
She might chose to share them with the rest of the family, but that should be her decision (I think!).
I am not getting involved, since obviously she does not seem to have a problem with it (it's not the first time this has happened either, at some point she asked me, to send her some of my self-made beef jerky, but her son opened the parcel and ate the jerky before she came home from work).
But I wondered what YOUR opinion is on this.
By the way, there are two sons involved and they are 16 and 19.
I'd say the beef isn't the only thing that's jerky.
My guess is that until she actually gets some respect from her family you will have to send her packages to her work address.
Joe(my guess is that will be until forever and a day)Nation
I'm thinking it's federal jurisdiction.
Your local Postal Inspector should have the proper forms.
Heh-heh....
I'd love to see their faces when they open the subpoena before Mom gets home.
(I thought about the rat poison too, or Ex-Lax in the Twinkies, but I think they're a little young for that.)
Dang... You're in Germany.
Do they have postal laws over there?
Registered mail with "Signature Required".
She'll have to go to the post office to pick it up, but when she
complains, tell her that's HER problem.
Maybe she'll get the message.
(Personally, I think her family is outrageous, but so is much of life
and there are bigger things to actually worry about).
Because it's her messed up household, and the consequences are not very important so far,
I think the issue is only worth entertainment value.
If it's amusing, do something.
And if you should mail something important to her, be grateful that you now know to be careful.
(Using a work address, or registered mail).
I've lost a few items, mailing internationally, and though it's disappointing
when my intentions don't work out, it's just a little thing.
I guess I'd ask if this is a one time thing or if it happens all the time.
Seems to me that the package was addressed to her so, IMO, no one should open it without her permission. But it also sounds like she may have been allowing this sort of thing all along in which case the only person responsible is herself.
One of the things you do as a parent is set limits for your children. It sounds like opening mail that isn't addressed to them is a limit that was never set.
It's just difficult for me to understand that somebody would not mind that sort of thing.
My sister-in-law is such a person, too.
While my brother was at work, I emailed him and her some photographs.
Both mails were opened before my brother got home from work.
That annoyed me, even though it should not really be my problem.
As long as they are happy with it, what is it to me?
Bohne--
Your friend is raising lousy husband material.
I don't think you can do anything about her sticky-fingered offspring. Instead prepare yourself for the idea that any treat you mail your friend is going to be intercepted--with her tacit approval.
Bohne wrote:It's just difficult for me to understand that somebody would not mind that sort of thing.
My sister-in-law is such a person, too.
While my brother was at work, I emailed him and her some photographs.
Both mails were opened before my brother got home from work.
That annoyed me, even though it should not really be my problem.
As long as they are happy with it, what is it to me?
Not your problem? At what point does it become not your problem. I mean, these kids stole from you a gift that you were attempting to give to someone else. Although it's legally hers after it goes to her mailbox, she didn't get the gift yet, so it was really you they were stealing from.
I think that's awful and disrespectful.
But maybe that's how it swings at their house. Does she open their stuff?
She might actually be quite upset about it but didn't want to "make a big deal" about it in front of you (via the phone, or email) and so she minimizes it.
I think it's clearly not OK but also something that's not really your jurisdiction. You can maybe bring it up sideways, see what she says. Like, "This message board I frequent has all of these people who think ____ is OK...", see how she responds. Might lead to talking about it and maybe you can help her with some limits.
But if you want it to get to her and not the ravenous kids, I like the idea of sending it to her workplace.
Bohne wrote:Well, do you think there is any action necessary?
She obviously doesn't mind them opening/eating her presents!
I already told her that I might send her a vibrator one of these days.
Would LOVE to see their faces when they open that!
You know, I had exactly the same idea.
However, I think I would send something A LOT worse than a vibrator.
Also, I agree with Stuh. You sent the candy to the woman, the sons stole it from you.
I would be pissed, too, if a gift I had bought for her had been eaten by her sons. That, however, is her problem, not yours.
The only thing I would do is say that I'm not sending any more stuff because it never gets to her and it wasn't meant for her kids. Just don't send any more parcels.
If she allows it - then there is no issue for their family situation.
However, for you, if you want her to receive it and enjoy then either send it to her at work, or stop sending things. I might even be bold enough if she were to ask to send some jerky - that you would prefer not to as she doesn't get to enjoy it herself.
As far as emails - I will open up my husband's emails - usually though if it is from family or some one we both know - equal friends sort of thing. For one thing the emails come to the same inbox so we don't necessarily know who it is directed and also because I love looking and reading about friends and family. I once apologized for opening a work related email in error and he said I don't care.
When my kids get mail, I never open it - part of the thrill of getting your own mail when you are little is opening the package.
Linkat wrote:
When my kids get mail, I never open it - part of the thrill of getting your own mail when you are little is opening the package.
When you're little? It's still part of the thrill!!
Unless it's a bill....then he can have it.
Bella Dea wrote:Linkat wrote:
When my kids get mail, I never open it - part of the thrill of getting your own mail when you are little is opening the package.
When you're little? It's still part of the thrill!!
Unless it's a bill....then he can have it.
Well that explains it - I only get bills and junk mail - the kids get the fun stuff.
Awww... well, send me your address and I'll send you something exciting, but ONLY if your kids won't open it and eat it!
Hey, that gives me an idea for Bohne... send your friend something disgustingly smelly wrapped very, very tightly so they don't smell it till it's open ... whaddya think?
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