20 years

Congrats!

And what if anything do you plan for Valentine's Day?

Thanks, Duce, good to see you, btw. How've you been?

We'll keep V-Day low key, as usual. He mentioned something about champagne. Next Monday, however, we're planning on going to a 'Fat Monday' celebration at a local club that includes a jambalaya cookoff and one of the New Orleans bands that we enjoy. We've adopted NO as our home away from home and visit as often as we can. This gives us a taste of NO in the snowy north.

Speaking of adopting New Orleans as a home away from home... For many years we've talked about relocating to the mid-Atlantic coast once the kids were out and on their own. We've recently been talking about spending a year or two in New Orleans to see if we'd like to make it a permanent move. I doubt we'll stay in Chicago longterm, and we're probably 5 years from going anywhere for more than an extended visit.

Mr B has been talking about returning to school for his PhD and I'm a modem connection (or wifi) away from work anywhere. He's either going to have to do it soon (before we have two kids in college) or later, once we get to where we're going. Louisiana has a few great schools -- maybe we'll end up there in graduate student housing for a couple years. I can think of worse things!

JPB--

Twenty year anniversaries and new beginnings.

Very good.

Hold your dominion.

Thanks, noddy. It's certainly been a journey, and the ride isn't over yet.


The concept of being just the two of us is foreign. I became pregnant only a few months after we married so, although we had a couple years together between my move to Chicago and becoming parents, it does seem like a beginning. As does a return to school for Mr B.

I thought of discussing the empty-nester concept on the Parenting board, but it's more about the two of us than the fact that the kids will be out of the house. I'm interested to hear stories from others as they transitioned to this stage in their relationships.

Congratulations to Mr. and Mrs. B!

Nice memories to think about right before Valentine's Day, JPB.

Time passes too quickly. It is great to have a successful relationship to sentimentalize.

Thanks, JW. Time seems to be passing more quickly each year. Even the girls are commenting on how fast the school year is going by. K is starting to get nervous and excited at the same time about leaving for college -- even though she still has another year of high school. M is spending more and more time with her friends, giving Mr B and I a chance to do more things together. M begins driver's ed next month. Watch out! They'll both be on the roads soon.

The girls know that we don't plan on living here longterm. The only reason we've stayed here this long is to not uproot them from their school and their roots. This is where they're from -- they consider it home. I don't and would love to be back on the east coast (although not back in New England). The idea of spending a bit of time in the delta is also intriguing.

There's still plenty of time to change my mind over and over, but I wouldn't be surprised to see us hanging our hats in NO or Lafayette at one point or another.

J_B, the years behind you have sounded good and the years in front of you look good. I guess one can't ask for much more than that.

Good luck and godspeed.

Here are a few flowers

Congratulations on working at keeping a marriage together this long.
Congratulations on staying happy
And even a bit more congrats' for the new begining.

Yep, you're right, gus, thanks. I've no complaints and I'm looking ahead with enthusiasm. I've never been one to look back to lament a decision once made. I can think of a few times when I questioned my sanity on a move I was about to make, but it's all been good -- even when it wasn't.

Maybe I'll be more successful in getting you to visit our new digs (wherever they turn out to be) than I've been in getting you back to Chicago. You still owe me a beer!

Shewolf -- ah, shucks! I love sunflowers! Thanks. And thanks for the warm thoughts. Something tells me you'll be doing a trip down memory lane some day yourself.

That's a nice idea JPB

Sweet. Happy anniversaries.

In my case the last chick to leave the nest was a very nasty stepson and my emotions were unalloyed joy.

Thanks, stuh and jes.

noddy -- heh! Yeah, I think that's the way is was with my parents too. Wait! I was the last one to leave home, what am I saying? After I left, however, there was a revolving door of first one, then another, child returning home to live with my folks. I could tell the difference in how well my parents got along when there was (or wasn't) a child living in the house. My father was much more attentive to my mother when there were no offspring competing for her attentions.

At this point, I'm looking forward to changes and new beginnings. Not that I don't love my kids, just that I'm looking forward to all of us moving on to the next stage. I've recently heard that 35% of college graduates in the US are returning home to live with their parents after finishing school. I think my next house might be a small cottage, the perfect size for two, in the middle of a swamp. I don't want to make it too appealing for long-term guests.

35%?! Wow!

Congratulations on 20 years!

Thanks, soz.

I didn't have any references for that figure -- just party convo. I did a quick search and found THIS which is even higher than 35%.




I'll never say never, but we're not encouraging the idea.

Congratulations JPB. You deserve every bit of your happiness. Good luck with the empty nest, too.

I like the energy you are approaching this with, jpb; I like hearing about the concourse of your family.

Thanks, Bill. You know I wish you the same on your new endeavors.

Osso, thanks. We've spent years planning for retirement but little time planning for the days when it will be the two of us before retirement. I know lots of folks our age are starting new midlife careers and I'm happy to cut back on lifestyle if Mr B wants to hit the books again. I'm fortunate to have a successful business that can relocate almost anywhere. I get to move somewhere warmer, keep my work contacts, and find new pursuits to throw myself into ~~ it's win, win.

As to the idea of kids returning home after college -- we have a number of friends whose kids are returning home during college after deciding that the rigors of being responsible for their own success are too much for them. They're coming back home, living with mom & dad, taking a class or two at community colleges and partying like mad - all on their parent's checkbook. Again, I'll never say never, but lifelong rescuing is not part of my master plan.

Mr. Noddy was afraid of Rebound Kids and insisted that we build a very small house: Kitchen, Living Room, Bath, One Bedroom. I wasn't happy about this and over the years have become more and more discontented.

His kids are local. Mine have migrated and the pleasure of their visits is somewhat diluted because the futon in the Living Room (not terribly comfortable seating) is the Guest bed.

I recommend a Guest Bedroom/Study/Place for Perpetual Jigsaw Puzzle. If the room has many uses, the Rebound Kids aren't going to settle in for an indefinite stay.