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THE UNCLE ELLPUS PROBLEM PAGE.

 
 
dadpad
 
  1  
Reply Fri 10 Nov, 2006 10:53 pm
my friends all drive porches
I must make amends
0 Replies
 
shewolfnm
 
  1  
Reply Fri 10 Nov, 2006 11:23 pm
Dialing for dollars is trying to find me
0 Replies
 
Eva
 
  1  
Reply Fri 10 Nov, 2006 11:23 pm
<ROTFLMAO at Osso!>
0 Replies
 
shewolfnm
 
  1  
Reply Fri 10 Nov, 2006 11:23 pm
oh wait

you want that in order huh..


(ahem)

Worked hard all my liiife time


no help from my friends
0 Replies
 
Chai
 
  1  
Reply Sat 11 Nov, 2006 11:14 am
Dear Uncle Ellpus

Could you please explain to me what an organism feels like? My husband says it should feel like "something is inside of you", but unfortunately he couldn't be much clearer than that.

I tried to ask him to explain further, but by that time I was unable to speak clearly.
0 Replies
 
Lord Ellpus
 
  1  
Reply Mon 13 Nov, 2006 02:03 am
Chai Tea wrote:
Dear Uncle Ellpus

Could you please explain to me what an organism feels like? My husband says it should feel like "something is inside of you", but unfortunately he couldn't be much clearer than that.

I tried to ask him to explain further, but by that time I was unable to speak clearly.


Dear Chai, please don't worry your pretty little head about what an organism feels like, as this sensation is purely for the enjoyment of us males.
Ladies may have experienced what comes close to what they consider to be an organism, whilst inadvertantly leaning against their washing machines during the spin cycle as they chat endlessly to their friends on the phone about flower arranging, or some other very worthwhile female activity.
This, however, is just a natural reaction to the joys of being able to wash your partner's undergarments, and should not be confused with a genuine organism which causes the male to grunt louder than usual, whilst his eyes disappear into the back of his head, and his hands go blue from excessive tugging against the restraints of the furry handcuffs.
A proper organism is followed by a strong urge for the male to either, a) roll over and go to sleep straight away, or b) stroll into the garden wearing only a quilted smoking jacket and one sock, in order to light up a Havana.
To see whether your man is a snooze or Havana type of guy, just give him the best organism of his life, then see what he does whilst you prepare a nice meal for him to eat, once he has fully recovered.
0 Replies
 
vinsan
 
  1  
Reply Mon 13 Nov, 2006 02:49 am
My Dear Agony Uncle,

If sex is a subject of humor, why dont we laugh when we have sex?
0 Replies
 
Francis
 
  1  
Reply Mon 13 Nov, 2006 03:00 am
vinsan wrote:
My Dear Agony Uncle,

If sex is a subject of humor, why dont we laugh when we have sex?


Who is we here?
0 Replies
 
vinsan
 
  1  
Reply Mon 13 Nov, 2006 03:19 am
Quote:
Who is we here?


We The People! Razz
0 Replies
 
Chai
 
  1  
Reply Mon 13 Nov, 2006 06:24 am
I laugh....I sob.....afterwards I stumble into walls.

(see Francis, you didn't think USA'ers knew how to have good sex :wink: )
0 Replies
 
BumbleBeeBoogie
 
  1  
Reply Mon 13 Nov, 2006 09:29 am
Ellpus
Do I have an unusual form of orgaism? I go into deep sobs for a few moments. Is that an oral orgaism?

Needless to say, my lovers are startled by my sobs and, at first, think I'm complaining about their performance.

BBB
0 Replies
 
Bella Dea
 
  1  
Reply Mon 13 Nov, 2006 09:35 am
Chai Tea wrote:
I laugh....I sob.....afterwards I stumble into walls.

(see Francis, you didn't think USA'ers knew how to have good sex :wink: )


When you get old, that's what happens when you over exert yourself. Jello legs.

:wink:
0 Replies
 
 

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