How do I get this guy out of my head??

martybarker - It sounds like you have "vulnerable" tattooed across your forehead. Sleazy men can spot it a mile off.

Right now you are feeling unloved and unwanted, so that the attention from this man seems desirable. But, in your heart of hearts, you already KNOW that he is not for you.

Don't settle for his crumbs. Just go about your life, doing things that make you happy, and if someone right comes along, go for it. But please don't waste any more emotional energy on this guy.

Thanks friends! The emotions I've been experiencing for the past couple of years are driving me crazy! My self esteem really took a hit when my ex left and I know I have to get back on track. I should never have gotten involved with this man in the first place. I was having another weak moment last night as it was Friday, the kids were at their dad's and I was home alone. Work was really stressful this past week.
I guess I thought I could be a big girl and just appreciate him as a friend. Which he was before we got involved.

Marty--

What are your plans for tonight? For next Friday night?

Get busy planning.

Good point. I'm on-call for work so I have to stay within 30 minutes. This makes it hard to go to see a movie as I have been paged during a movie before.

Marty--

If you don't find something more exciting, I sentence you to the gym for both Friday and Saturday nights.

I should run my butt off on the treadmill and come home too tired to think about it.

Marty--

When your fleeing temptation, you might as well burn calories.

Hold your dominion.

Thanks, you know I just want to feel free and happy. I hate falling into ruts and feeling sorry for myself.

Marty--

A lot of life is self-inflected Rut Aversion Therapy.

Off on a bike ride now. Thanks for the words...again!

Hi there, I have just read your post and as you gave me so much support I just anted to give you some too.
It seems like we both attract creeps!

Believe me, you will get over him especially if you keep yourself busy. That is the knack. If I am alone, with nothing to do, I start going over the details of the relationship and what I could have done or said differently.
But then I realise that I am beating myself up and for what? For a cheat who just wants sex on his terms and who can just switch himself off if HIS needs aren't being met.
So you keep your schedule full and eventually (remembering all the crap he gave you too), he will fade from your memory. Even if you just go to a coffee shop or a mall that's fine, because you can distract yourself.
I don't recommend hanging around the Relationship section of the local book store though!

Remember there are other decent men out there, so don't act as if he is your only and last choice. He isn't and you will find someone who will cherish you in time.

Thinking of you

BUT... I LIKE THIS GUY... AND HE MOVED TO HAWAII FOR A YEAR AND WHENEVER I TALK ABOUT SCHOOL IT REMINDS ME OF HIM... CAUSE WE HAD ALOT OF GOOD THINGS WE DID.... SO WHAT DO I DO?? AND HE LIKE ME TOO... AND I DONT HAVE ANYTHING TO CONTACT HIM.. LETTER NO ADRESS PHONE DONT KNOW THE NUMBER AND ANYTHING ELSE I DONT HAVE....

But... i like this guy and he likes me.... and whenever i think of school it reminds me of him cause we have had alot of good times in the school year.. and i have nothing to contact him with. he moved to hawaii cause his dad is in the military or something... so ya.. but anyways.. Letter: no adress. phone: no number.. and anything else i dont have what do i do to get him out of my mind... it is SO hard... please if u have anything.... please reply to me ASAP...
Thanx Tara

thats just like me.. he just cant get out of my head but i like the guy.. but now i got some things in the mail from HIM!! I was so shocked but then i replyed to ONE ONLY ONE of the letters and he started to flip out so i stopped liking him.. but do u like the guy that keeps sending u the emails??

marty - you are in love with a fantasy.

He is not there for you. Face that.
He is there for anyone who will put out. Face that.
(He's already let you know he's out for casual sex with anyone) Face that.

Visualize yourself in a relationship with him and he cheats on you all the time.
Because you know he will.

That reality ought to set you straight.

Now . . . stop diverting your energy away from your real quest to find a nice guy.

Why are you replying to Marty's post of a few years ago?

You also seem to make leaps of conjecture and villification of a person Marty was dealing with in her last post.

Yeah a little but I little another guy what should I do?

Well the guy that dumped me he called me names and flirted with other girls and one time he dumped me because he was dating someone different well he was dating me.

In these sort of situations I always recommend people read 'The Art of Seduction' by Robert Greene. If you look it up on Amazon, you will find a lot over positive and a lot of very negative reviews on...and virtually they are all wrong (as a lot of people first read it to attempt to learn seduction). The book is a catalog of human weakness - explaining why people are sometimes/often attracted to other people who are bad for them.

Within the book, most people will find a weakness /weaknesses that ring a bell with them, and because of this books value as an eye openner that I've recommended it to a number of people.

Other than that, it's just a plain disturbing book