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Perpetual Limerick (:3=

Forums: Limericks, Original Writing, Otf, Perpetual Limerick
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dlowan
 
  1  
Reply Mon 28 Aug, 2006 03:15 am
But it has not cured me
I'm taking another to tea
And if she isn't sweet
No retreat shall I beat,
But go searching for numero three!


A recalcitrant clerk from Manila
0 Replies
 
smorgs
 
  1  
Reply Mon 28 Aug, 2006 03:31 am
A recalcitrant clerk from Manila
Would not follow rules whilst at dinner
Used a fork for a knife
Until punched by his wife
So he choked her with a mantilla

(sorry - Walter de la Mer would be turning in his grave)

A bandy legged policeman from Kew
said I really don't know what to do
I can stop without fuss
A lorry or bus
But bubble cars simply go through

There was a young man from Brunei
0 Replies
 
Francis
 
  1  
Reply Mon 28 Aug, 2006 03:48 am
((sorry - Walter de la Mer would be turning in his grave) - it was a very small mer, maybe a little mare...)


There was a young man from Brunei
Who was looking for a good lay
0 Replies
 
smorgs
 
  1  
Reply Mon 28 Aug, 2006 05:37 am
It's always nice when fellow members/friends correct your spelling for you...

Sometimes my dyslexia can cause me problems, when words are not recognised by spellcheck.
0 Replies
 
Merry Andrew
 
  1  
Reply Mon 28 Aug, 2006 06:54 am
There was a young man from Brunei
Who was looking for a good lay.
So he went to a house,
The lecherous louse
0 Replies
 
spendius
 
  1  
Reply Mon 28 Aug, 2006 07:53 am
There was a young man from Brunei
Who was looking for a good lay.
So he went to a house,
The lecherous louse
And a louse should be made to pay.

Only poets can get it free
They can charm the birds from the tree.
0 Replies
 
Merry Andrew
 
  1  
Reply Mon 28 Aug, 2006 07:56 am
Only poets can get it free
They can charm the birds from the tree.
Tho' sometimes they, too
0 Replies
 
smorgs
 
  1  
Reply Mon 28 Aug, 2006 08:21 am
Thought it was pronounced Bruneye?

...well it IS where I come from?

x
0 Replies
 
Mame
 
  1  
Reply Mon 28 Aug, 2006 08:54 am
smorgs wrote:
Thought it was pronounced Bruneye?

...well it IS where I come from?

x


Me, too Smile

Only poets can get it free
They can charm the birds from the tree.
Tho' sometimes they, too
Have nothing to do
So they spend their time with me.

A lady I knew called Mabelle
For a hobby would ring a bell
She'd walk up and down
All over the town
0 Replies
 
spendius
 
  1  
Reply Mon 28 Aug, 2006 11:39 am
A lady I knew called Mabelle
For a hobby would ring a bell
She'd walk up and down
All over the town
Shouting, "I've got something to sell."

Three young lads emerged from a bar
0 Replies
 
Mame
 
  1  
Reply Mon 28 Aug, 2006 11:41 am
Three young lads emerged from a bar
The Youngest was covered in tar
His tie was askew
He'd only one shoe
0 Replies
 
Merry Andrew
 
  1  
Reply Mon 28 Aug, 2006 11:58 am
Three young lads emerged from a bar
The Youngest was covered in tar
His tie was askew
He'd only one shoe
But he swore he'd drunk only one jar.

Well, the judge didn't buy it,
Read him the riot
Act so that
0 Replies
 
spendius
 
  1  
Reply Mon 28 Aug, 2006 12:45 pm
Our Andy is obviously pissed
Or else there's some fingers he's missed
But I feel quite sure
That a lady that's pure
Will see that he don't go unkissed.

His two pals could not claim the same
So they made a dart at the dame
Who put down her bell
With a piercing yell
0 Replies
 
Mame
 
  1  
Reply Mon 28 Aug, 2006 01:47 pm
His two pals could not claim the same
So they made a dart at the dame
Who put down her bell
With a piercing yell
Screeched out, What the hell is my name?


The Scottish lassie by a loch
wears two shoes but only one sock
She has longish hair
Which covers her bare
0 Replies
 
McTag
 
  1  
Reply Mon 28 Aug, 2006 02:23 pm
The Scottish lassie by a loch
wears two shoes but only one soch
She has longish hair
Which covers her bare
Essentials, so don't go amoch

A mermaid flipped onto a rock
0 Replies
 
spendius
 
  1  
Reply Mon 28 Aug, 2006 02:29 pm
The Scottish lassie by a loch
wears two shoes but only one sock
She has longish hair
Which covers her bare
Bum from the eyes of the peeping jocks.

She knelt on the bank of a brook
For a drink, it seems, she had took
0 Replies
 
Mame
 
  1  
Reply Mon 28 Aug, 2006 03:05 pm
A mermaid flipped onto a rock
And carefully pulled off her sock
She combed out her hair
And laid her chest bare
And slowly began to take stock.

Two fishes were in the pool
With one looking like Joe Cool
His shades were hot stuff
0 Replies
 
spendius
 
  1  
Reply Mon 28 Aug, 2006 03:22 pm
Two fishes were in the pool
With one looking like Joe Cool
His shades were hot stuff
And he called her bluff
And went round the back like a fool.

Her eyelashes batted like fans,
These mermaids don't operate bans,
0 Replies
 
Mame
 
  1  
Reply Mon 28 Aug, 2006 04:16 pm
Her eyelashes batted like fans,
These mermaids don't "operate bans"
I haven't a clue
what that means, do you?
Never mind, I'll just get a tan.

My legs are long and silky
0 Replies
 
spendius
 
  1  
Reply Mon 28 Aug, 2006 05:41 pm
My legs are long and silky
The tea I'm drinking is milky
My fag's half way down
The maid's got a gown
0 Replies
 
 

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