All the Christmas decorations are up
But those jingle-bells never shut up
On Donner ! and mmm Oxycontin
so many toys I've been wantin'
All the Christmas decorations are up
But those jingle-bells never shut up
On Donner ! and mmm Oxycontin
so many toys I've been wantin'
Beware the Grinch & his sled-pullin' pup.
++++++++++++++++++++++
The eggnog shakes from MickeyD's
Smell like paint and can make me sneeze.
The first sips are rough
Yet I can't get enough ...
The eggnog shakes from MickeyD's
Smell like paint and can make me sneeze.
The first sips are rough
Yet I can't get enough ...
And they're clogging my arteries.
+++++++++++++++++++++
There once was a girl from Bangkok
There once was a girl from Bangkok
Whose purpose was to avoid havoc
There once was a girl from Bangkok
Whose purpose was to avoid havoc.
Although known to tease,
She was eager to please
There once was a girl from Bangkok
Whose purpose was to avoid havoc.
Although known to tease,
She was eager to please
In no way she would mock
She was a good looking girl
As beautiful as a pearl
She was a good looking girl
As beautiful as a pearl.
She learned in charm school
To follow the rule
To smile and not be a churl.
++++++++++++++++++
Her sister, on the other hand,
Drank heavily and formed a girls' band
Her sister, on the other hand,
Drank heavily and formed a girls' band
They were a lot hilarious
They became quite famous
Her sister, on the other hand,
Drank heavily and formed a girls' band.
They were a lot hilarious
They became quite famous
With the youth of Laos and Thailand.
++++++++++++++++++
Their top songs were mainly loud noise
Which appealed to miscreant boys
Their top songs were mainly loud noise
Which appealed to miscreant boys.
But they paid off her bills
And cured her mom's ills
And bought her so many nice toys.
But once at a gig in Hanoi,
She slept with a communist boy.
When her period was late
She pondered her fate ...
No more gigs, but perhaps the Bolshoi.
She bought a maternity tutu;
It seemed like the right thing to do.
That spandex gave way
With her first plie ...
And three patrons went home black-and-blue.
<<Sorry. Tied to the computer today.>>
+++++++++++++++++++
She was blessed with a pair of twins
She was blessed with a pair of twins
When she foughts them she never wins
She was blessed with a pair of twins,
When she fights them she never wins.
But it must have hurted
When they all converted
And publicly lost their foreskins.
+++++++++++++++++
Once again the road tour begins
For the Kommunist Kosher Chins
Once again the road tour begins
For the Kommunist Kosher Chins.
But please be alerted
Again they've converted ...
The Chins have become Born-Agains.
+++++++++++++++++++++
On the road they don't misbehave
They're focused on souls they can save
On the road they don't misbehave
They're focused on souls they can save.
They shout "halleluya!"
And "How d'you do, ya
Sinful, besotted, foul knave!"
There once was an old folksinger,
Surely no surly gunslinger.
He had a guitar
There once was an old folksinger,
Surely no surly gunslinger.
He had a guitar
And a half-smoked cigar
There once was an old folksinger,
Surely no surly gunslinger,
He had a guitar
And a half-smoked cigar
His music smoked like a real humdinger (gad, that's bad! sorry)
There once was a weal wightous wabbit
There once was a weal wightous wabbit
who frightened nuns out of habit.
brimstone and fire,
no earthly desire.
There once was a weal wightous wabbit
who frightened nuns out of habit.
Brimstone and fire,
no earthly desire.
But the bunny had fun, dagnabbit!
A lion tamer named X
Once worked a terrible hex
On that bunny
A lion tamer named X
Once worked a terrible hex
On that bunny,
Madam Honey
Who worked on a film rated XXX
There once was a kid named Potter
Who always performed as he ought ter
There once was a kid named Potter
Who always performed as he ought ter
I know what you thought,
But he didn't make pots
<good to see you whooda!>
