Why do we bear children and rear them?

Im not knocking people who want to have kids, but I do find it strange that some people have kids when they are very young, its almost like a continuous cycle.
The parents havnt found out why they are on the planet yet and they are already reproducing.
Surely it makes sense to have your own life before you create a new life.

I hear ya, but that "finding myself" thing can become a lifetime endeavor for some folks who never want to grow up.

fair enough, Im not saying commit your life to finding yourself but there is no harm in doing your own thing then having kids later in life when you are financially and emotional better equipt to handle it.

It seems in the UK that kids are bringing up kids.Not the best way to do things IMO.

Or at least to have some idea of who they are and what they can contribute to a child's upbringing. We don't have to accomplish everything before we have children -- it's not like it's retirement. But I agree that some introspection and growth is preferable to thoughtless and instinctual procreation.

Given the last few posts, which I really echo by the way, I thought I'd post a link to a news story that appeared a couple of weeks back. Did anyone catch this? It shocked me on so many levels...

11 year old pregnant...

*shakes head*

Nature does nudge us towards offspring,but as the techs of contraception are so effective now that we are free to make our choice to have kids or not.as Littlek wrote in his post that a portion of the population don't have that drive to breed,some still do,some never do.so the problem now is not about nature's drive but mainly our own free choice.

I realize this thread is dealing primarily with the reasons for having children, but I feel compelled to add something that is perhaps off-topic:



Because personally, I don't see having free choice in this instance as detrimental. Yes, biology propels us to further the species. Yes, doing so can greatly enhance your life. This is most certainly true. However, the choice to abstain from child-rearing can be just as satisfying.

I am a woman who has no intention of having children. This is not out of dislike towards children or a disregard for the future of humanity. I personally don't feel the desire to have children. I also don't see a necessity for it on a global scale.

I am neither 'elite' nor 'wasting my potential.' I am happy to be living a child-free life.

I don't mean to insinuate that there is anything wrong with being a mother, stay-at-home or otherwise. If it makes you happy, rock on.

Because people all over the world have so many kids, it allows some of us the choice to not.

If we are free to make choice, we may choose the wrong one.for we human beings are not intelligent enough to make every desicion perfectly in our interest.So in most cases we just obey what nature tells us to do,for instance,we don't know when and how much water we need for our body,it is nature tells us when and how much to drink by letting us feel thirst.in such cases we'll never be wrong to obey nature's instruction.
In the case of reproduction,I don't know why we won't be wrong if we totally ignore nature's instruction.

What is nature's instruction, though?

Clearly, there are people who don't want to have kids. They don't feel that drive. Couldn't the very lack of drive to have children be nature's instruction, too?

Too many children can tax the resources of a group, and harm the chances of each child reaching maturity.

Nature allows us to have our say. For instance, we don't just piss in our pants when our bladders are full. Nature also gives us insanity -- a not-so-infrequent side effect of bearing and raising children. As a society and as individuals, we have some control over how much insanity we embrace in our lives. Even animals have this control, though it's not as neatly exercised as it is in humans.

FreeDuck- I really love the way you put this. It illustrates precisely how I feel.

If you encounter a person who choose to end up his(her) life, I really don't know what you could say reasonablly to prevent him(her).

How is choosing not to have kids a problem?

While suicide is ultimately the individual's choice, there are a multitude of preventative measures you could attempt.

However, I fail to see a correlation between suicide and the topic at hand.

Choosing not to have kids is a problem with personal consequences,I can give no reason for that except you can give the reason why you,or any other one, exist in this world.

Suicide is the intentional cessation of your life. Some view this as strictly perjorative while others hold the view that it is the ultimate act of autonomy.

Choosing not to bear children is not suicide. To suggest this is to promote the concept that child rearing is the only purpose for living. I don't believe this to be true. I feel confident in this regard for the simple fact that there is no convention where parents kill themselves once their children reach sexual maturity.

Death is unavoidable, regardless of the number of children you do or do not bear. Genetics is not my field, but I think I remember that, if you have full siblings, most of your DNA will be passed on through their offspring. This would be the case in my family. However, I don't worry about things like that because they will not really impact me. While the future of the human race does concern me, I don't presume that my specific genetic makeup is of significant importance on its own. And if it is, what will it matter? I will be dead either way.

I believe this snapshot of world history is the most important because this is when I am living. This is when I can effect social, political, and cultural change. This is when I am my most influential. I feel that having children is certainly one method of influence. But it isn't the only one. I would even say that it is one of the least reliable methods. Because just as I do not remember my great-great-great grandparents, I would not expect any theoretical progeny to remember me in the centuries to come.

I don't feel you should have children because you fear death, or due to an archaic concept of muliebrity, or to appease your ego. I don't think you should have kids because you think they are cute. I believe you should have children if you feel the desire to love a child for the rest of its life. No matter who he or she grows up to be. Any benefits that occur should be born out of this love.

Really well said. Excellent post.

Choosing not to bear children is not suicide,but both of them have nearly the similar consequences, they are both disaffirmation of life,both are intentional cessation of life,the difference is one immediately,another chronically in order to enjoy the little rest of life without the disturbance of kids.
Rearing children is not the whole part of any parent's life,it is only a part of life itself, although this part of life is so important that they'll never abandon in any case.
Nature allows us to have our say is intend to make us more effective,more confidential in life,never intend to make us to take nigative actions against life,such as suicide,abstain from procreation,homosexuality,etc.
Rearing one's own children is the affirmation of one's own life,it certainly deserves our sacrifice of our time and energy and it is a part of life itself.