Regarding Kitkat_bar

Does this subject actually warrant a special thread? (BTW, I'm not familiar with this poster's threads, but ......)

there are so many threads from Kitkat. People have flamed her too on this thread. So I did not know which one to go and add my two cents to. I thought of creating a new one so everyone would see it.

Well, why not ignore her many threads instead of starting a new one just to be critical? Lots of folk here are repetitive. Some are plain offensive ... I just switch off those threads/comments & read something else if they grate on me.

Yes, I ignored since the time I read all of her threads. Many members have ignored too. But many have not.

People come here for advice. The tone in those threads(the flaming) may well be interpretated as unfriendly. That can drive away some posters and also this kind of tone does not set the standards of a good forum. I am not a moderator. It is not my call to ask others how they should behave either. I was just voicing my opinion. If they still wish to flame.. I can't stop it.

If I wanted I could have gone to each of this thread and wrote the exact same piece of information in all of these. But did not do that because 1. many of these threads are ignored anyway. 2. I would be just repeating myself. 3. I wanted to centralize. Hence a new thread.

I really enjoy this forum and visit here for many valuable information and advice. I have been greatly helped by this forum and I only wish the best for it. Hence I chose to voice my opinion instead of staying quiet.

I agree with msolga. I am not familiar with the threads of which you have mentioned. But I AM very familiar with the scroll button on my mouse, and use it often!

Dam, I thought you were gona talk about chocolate.

MG.. HA HA sorry to dissapoint you.

Phoenix, look at the first page. So many threads from Kitkat have been bumped from the past. That does not bother your scrolling.. but this one thread does?

Where did I say that this thread is bothersome? There are a number of people on A2K with whom I would never interact. The point that I am making, that IMO, if a thread or a member is annoying to another member, the best thing to do, IMO, is to pass it by.

Phoenix I am trying to say the same point as you are. "Better ignore if it is offensive."


You mentioned something about the scroll bar along with your agreement with msolga. msolga is in disagreement with starting a new thread. Taking these 2 together I thought you meant that one more post is irrelevant because you have to scroll down for other relevant posts. I might have misinterpretated. If so, my apologies.

LoveMyFamily, trying to control the posting behaviors of people on the internet simply isn't going to happen. When someone brings an issue to an internet forum they have to expect all sorts of responses. If they want individual, specific advice then they should be talking to a professional. There are many people who spend significant time here trying to give the best advice they can. Sometimes the advice is accepted, sometimes it's ignored. There are other people who think a humorous response is the best approach and others who are somewhere in between.

None of us are therapists, but when twenty people give the same advice and it's ignored over and over by the same poster then the tone of the advice starts to change.

I recall a different individual who shows up every so often with the same story line - I have a new boyfriend, I got drunk and slept with him, he hasn't called me in twenty minutes, I've sent him 42 text messages and he's ignoring me, what should I do? The story never changes but over time the advice has become more cynical. She keeps coming back and ignores anything we say.

None of us can make KKB see the writing on the wall. She has to live her own life and walk her own path. We can only give advice and, like the individual above, she can take what she wants and leave the rest.

I don't see KK as being flamed as much as pointing out her immaturity by trying to get down to her level of communication.

for instance, the "argument" between blacksmith and myself? Might be seen as a joke, as flaming, or as I meant it, showing her how her own arguments with her spouse would sound if she was listening to herself.

BTW, when I directly asked her what it was that was so "heavy" that she and her spouse "went through" together, her first response was the usual pathetic "oh you wouldn't understand", then asking me my opinion on whether to do it there, or start a new thread. I told her that was her call, and that's the last I've heard. I'm hoping (hope springs eternal) that when she's actually writing it down, she might see that whatever it was is certainly not worth what she has now....

btw, on one of her other threads (there's so many), I recently posted a more serious message, you're welcome to read.

If this young woman was expecting people to perpetually hold her hand and say "there, there" she isn't much in touch with reality.

Sometimes it gets to the point where you need to point out how foolish they are, and make them look at themselves.

Hey, a few times in my life, I've had good friends and complete strangers say something to me, that stopped me in my tracks and really made me look at MY part in the problem. They were painful wake up calls, but in the end, put things back in prespective.

If kitt_katt felt so insulted, she wouldn't keep coming back. It's all part of the drama of her life.

Excellent post, J_B.

I agree with chai tea. Our little "argument" was illustrative-- at least as I imagined it-- in a humorous way of the kind of circular, nonsensical arguing that she routinely seems to post about. KitKat obviously can't or won't take the sage advice which is offered time and again and it was my hope that humor would help to open her eyes to this destructive pattern she's involved in.

Give me a break
Give me a break
Break me off a piece
Of that KitKat bar ! ! !

MAGNIFICENT!

Whatever happened to diana78?

It's been a few months, Syn. We're do for a sighting any time now.

Re: Regarding Kitkat_bar



It is easy for you to say with no skin in the game. You haven't made any investment in your time trying to help her only to be ignored and then having to listen to her continue to play the victim.

J_B, I agree with most part of your post. It is not possible to control the posting behavior of people on the internet.

But some of it I don't. Don't you agree as members of a forum it is also our responsibility to keep the environment as cordial as we can. Again, it is only my opinion and was one of the reasons why I was enjoying this place for a long time - cordial environment. A2K has a bunch of mature posters who give sound advice to people, including you J_B. When we take so much from a place for free, we are also responsible to give something back in return, IMO. There will be immature posters but most of us on this forum are quite matured with respect to age and with respect to judgement and advices and are capable of shrugging it off without getting into incordialities.

Chai and blacksmithn, I was not picking on anyone in particular. I was not picking on anyone actually. I might have missed your argument. But one of them sure turned fun, so much that kitkat also had a laugh

Chai I did read the post you are talking about. One good piece you had there.