granted. now you've won $5... whoo hoo... big deal.
I wish Chinese women had never had their feet bound.
Granted.
Chinese women have never had their feet bound. They all wear the same size shoe you do, though, so you will never find anything available in your size again.
I wish I could eat anything I want and never gain weight. (Like my husband.)
Granted. Your digestive track ceases to extract nutrients from the food, so all food goes unprocessed through your body. The result? You can eat all you want, and die from lack of nutrients by the end of the week.
But you wont have gained an ounce in the process.
I wish I could control the weather worldwide.
Granted. You can now control the weather world wide. But no one is really happy with their weather now, and they know exactly who to blame for it. Throngs of screaming people appear at your door and throw rocks through your windows, the media hounds you relentlessly, you never have a moment's peace, and you are driven into hiding and spend the rest of your life in miserable isolation.
I wish I could end world hunger.
Granted.And now you have to decide whether or not to do it.
I wish I was making a documentary about conditions in a harem.
HA, POOF! Your Wish has been granted, your are now filming a documentary about the conditions of a harem, but just your luck, the harem you've been assigned to is full of woman that don't bathe or shave, and all wiegh over 800lbs apiece!!!
I wish ...I wish....hum,...lol, I wish for there to be no more homeless on our streets!
Granted. Now they all live in your house.
I wish I could read some of the burned scrolls from the library of Alexandria (the old one!)
Granted. Unfortunately they are all recipes for preparing humming-bird tongues for export to Rome, Cleopatra's make-up routine or lists of outstanding scroll-borrowers.
I wish I could fly.
Granted, you can now fly into walls, roadsigns and mountains....
I wish my head didn't hurt!
Granted. Now, if you'll just stop walking into walls, roadsigns and mountains, it won't come back.
Wish I had more energy.
(Really hope your head does stop hurting.)
Granted. You now have so much energy you can't sit still or sleep, you are constantly pacing and restlessly moving around, you jog instead of walking (even in a supermarket, bank, store, or library), and you can't stop talking or doing something active (like rearranging whatever you see). You drive everyone around you crazy, you lose your job, you are unable to drive your car, you are banned from stores, and you are emaciated from loss of weight because of your extreme energy level and you look like hell. You are just miserable and your fondest wish is to become a couch potato.
I wish I could go on a fantastic world cruise.
Granted. You have been transported to an all-expense-paid world tour of Neptune. Enjoy the Methane atmosphere, high gravity and minus-200 degree Celsius temperatures. You did pack breathing apparatus didn't you? Uh-oh.
I wish there were something good to watch on television.
Granted, your wish is my command!
Now starring MakeMeShivers in her own Karoke Parade....first up is MakeMeShivers with her stirring rendition of Etta James, "At Last". Its been said that Shivers version will bring tears to your eyes....
Followed by her tone deaf friend screeching to the 80's classic, "We got the beat", by the Bangles.
Its an all star packed show of Star Wannabe's and their crazy karoke antics.....
24/7 non-stop...with no commercial breaks!
Aren't you so lucky?
My wish is.....I would like to find a hunk-a- hunk of burnin' love..... :wink:
Granted. Too bad he's too hot to handle.
I wish I could quit smoking.
Granted. To get over your tobacco craze, you are now an alchoholic.
I wish I became wrestling state champ.
haHA!
Granted - unfortunately it's in the jello-wrestling category and you become so humiliated at having to slither around in jello with gorgeous girls all day you disappear from the eyes of the world and sit on a mountain top contemplating your navel.
I wish I had a beautiful garden.
granted.
unfortunately, it is an "herb" garden and the cops arrest you the next day. In addition, they burn down the garden and mistakenly burn down your house.
I wish I was 3 inches taller
Granted.
Now you bang your head on the low beams in English country pubs that haven't been modernised yet.
I wish I was casting director for the latest blockbuster The Vixens Get Loose.
Granted. However, due to the ambitious plot, one casting director isn't enough to fill all the roles in time. Apart from gorgeous, nubile young vixens the plot calls for elderly hell and brimstone preachers, 20 fat belching redneck prison guards (from which the vixens must break free) and two ugly transvestites.
As one of two casting directors, take a gander which parts YOU get to decide to fill in.
I wish I owned an Alaskan oil field.
Granted. However, it is in Alaska. MWAHAHAHAHAHA!
I wish I found $100 on the street
