Granted-- you have been transformed into the building in which a cook lives.
I wish my boyfriend would propose.
Granted. Unfortunately his current wife comes along as part of the package, and you have to live in Utah.
I wish I could sleep in tomorrow.
Granted. You have just been bitten by a tsetse fly.
I wish all the contestants in the "Amazing Race" would be kidnapped by aliens.
Granted (hard to corrupt that one), but then the aliens return them.
I wish my car could fly backwards.
Granted. Unfortunately, you have no control over when it will fly backwards or where it will go. Your car insurance sky rockets.
I wish I had a fun job.
Fun by whose standards? I personally love the taste of glue on envelopes, so-- Granted. You are now one of the top Test Lickers for the envelope industry.
I wish I was in great shape without having to exercise.
Granted.
You now have a magnificent body. Unfortunately, you still have your same head, and it's now sitting on an opposite sex body.
I wish I had a great talent.
Granted-- it's the kind of talent that gets you a great career in porn flicks.
I wish I was already done writing my term paper for Archaeology class.
Granted. You get a D, sorry.
I wish we had more toothpaste in the house.
Granted. Every tube, jar, and box in your house is now full of toothpaste. But, hey--you'll never have to buy toothpaste again. Oh and poof! All your teeth have just fallen out.
I wish someone would go to the store and get groceries for me.
Granted.
Assuming you are a lady I wish I could perform tasks for you when my efficiency has resulted in you not being able to think of anything else mundane.
Granted
You will now wash all the floors and windows in my house, do all the laundry and ironing, shop and prepare all meals, do general cleaning, mow the lawn, do all exterior and interior painting and repairs, and empty out my attic, basement, and garage--in return for nothing more than a smile from me.
I wish I had a large screen plasma TV.
Granted. Unfortunately the evil genie got you a screen filled with blood plasma.
I wish I had my own private jet.
Granted. Unfortunately it was decorated by Tammy Faye Bakker.
I wish it would rain more.
Granted. Unfortunately, it's raining cat poo. More and more cat poo.
I wish I lived in Hawaii.
Granted. However you didn't stipulate which island and you have been transported to the only one that has no trees, no grass, no water, only crabs and is never visited by anyone.
I wish I had a personal servant.
Wish granted.. Unfortunately, your personal servant turns out to be an evil sea witch evertime the full moon appears..
i wish the sun would revolve around the earth... (for a change)
Wish granted. However, the colossal forces necessary to cause this to occur create huge tectonic plate shifts, relocation of the polar axis, and massive solar flares that obliterate all life on the planet except for cockroaches, which in 10 billion years become the dominant intelligent life form on Earth.
I wish I had an ice cream cone.
Granted. You like liver-flavored ice cream, right?
I wish gasoline was 2 cents a gallon.
Granted .... unfortunately this gasoline will only give you .05 miles per gallon.
I wish I was able to leap tall buildings in a single bound.
