Quote:A few posts back I mentioned to you that compassion was my reason for talking with you.
Compassion for whom? Do you think I find it at all "compassionate" to wake up to this type of diatribe Mathos?
Quote:Your an interesting bint to talk to at times. However not only are my accusations of you being a snake like character more than well appointed and my accusations of you being a traitor furthermore embellished.
What's a "bint"? See
I talk to
you because I find it interesting. I increase my vocabulary, (not that I would ever use a word like bint - unless you were referring to me as someone's daughter -which I am. I hope you didn't mean it in the other sense as in "one step above a prostitute- you have no basis to say anything like that to me Mathos), and I experience the type of dialogue that I can't experience anywhere else in my life because I don't inspire such anger and what you call "compassion" in anyone I interact with on a regular basis in my real life. It's made me so much tougher. I can't even tell you. And that was a concern of mine. When he first met me, a friend of my husband's said to me, "You've led a really sheltered life, haven't you? There's just something really soft about you." And he was right. I was always used to being treated in a certain way and was very easily hurt. Interacting with you and Spendius has helped me develop a much thicker skin. I think I needed that. And it's good for me to learn how to be able to let things that I know are not true just roll off my back. You're meanness toward me says more about you Mathos than it does about me.
(I also talk to you because I really do enjoy your descriptions of your work and day to day life- I think I'd have loved to have lived and worked on a farm-you have such a great eye for nature - I can't deny it - I do get into that stuff).
Quote:You quite blatantly expose yourself as one of such dubious traits it amazes me you are able to sleep nights at all. Conspiracy and collusion are additional appropriations you may wear around your neck with honours, Young Lady.
I sleep like a baby at night mostly because I know that all the things you accuse me of are total fabrications. I am so loyal it's ridiculous. That's why when you called me fickle your last post - I just laughed. I wish I
could be fickle. It'd be a lot easier I think. And I'm literally
unable to collude and conspire with anyone. Again, sometimes I wish I could, and then I could make excuses for my behavior - you know, say, "Well, it was his/her idea." Nope, I always have to take responsibility for my own behavior because I honestly can't make myself do something if I don't want to do it- no matter who is trying to influence me to do so.
Quote:So you have been relentlessly conspiring and colluding with that object of unwashed, soiled and degenerated excuse for a man of fair stature; Spendius. Private Mail obviously comes to mind, the details there-in being totally irrelevant, no doubt your highly valued 'Christian' upbringing supports treachery on this scale.
Haven't spoken to Spendius since his last post here (except for a pm or two I sent him that same day to wheedle and cajole and try to find out what the heck I did or said to make him so angry. I was worried I had hurt his feelings).
Pm's had nothing to do with it. I was suspicious from the beginning because it seemed odd that Spendius would talk to me again after so long. But I always liked talking to him, so I went with it. And it was okay at first, but then I noticed that there was still that underlying anger and I had to ask myself why someone who was so angry at me and didn't seem to particularly like me would spend time talking with me. Then, I got clued in when he said that you were holding a stalagmite in your hand. Look back a few weeks or even months - it's right here somewhere. Your extreme annoyance at the quote bit was a bit of a clue as well. That's why when you said I was contrary - I laughed at that as well. I feel that I've been more than cooperative with you Mathos.
Quote:The additional comments you again reiterate with regard to your excessive drinking habits and obvious denial, prior to the 'I'm having fun' bit exudes symptoms of symptomatic alcoholism.

Okay. If you call six glasses of wine on average maybe every two or three weeks - I guess
you can consider me an alcoholic, if it serves you some purpose and makes you feel better in any way- which pointing out my faults does seem to do for you- (another one of
your interesting characteristics the good doctor might find telling if he were ever to hear about it.)
But seriously - I don't think we should joke about this. I am sensitive to the fact that it might be a problem for others and is never a laughing matter.
Quote:You might consider exchanging the habit for ganja, it could create some sincerity in you.
I don't smoke - anything - it hurts my throat and dries out my contacts, thus hurting my eyes as well. So you can appreciate the fact that it's just an overall painful and unpleasant experience for me, although I do understand that others find it relaxing and beneficial.
But I don't need pot to make me sincere. If anything, I'm already too sincere without it. That's why I have to monitor what I say on here after I've had anything to drink. I don't tend to be inhibited in very many ways to begin with and add any bit of alcohol - the sincerity just comes pouring out. Which isn't a bad thing usually - except in a forum when people are just looking for it as a sign of weakness.
Quote:Not too many years back you would have been accused of 'witchcraft' for carrying on in such an underhanded format. I doubt I have to issue you quotes of the types of punishments witches would have received according to Kramer & Sprenger and their amazing book Malleus Maleficarum.
Yep - that's interesting. You know anyone (female especially) who was considered different in
any way might be suspected of and accused of witchcraft. I don't take that as an insult at all Mathos- because if you knew your facts you'd find it was exactly because they were often women who were
not practiced at behaving in an underhanded way, or in fact refused to. In fact, quite the opposite was more often true. What a wonderful analogy - I think it's very fitting actually - and I hadn't thought of it before. Good on you Mathos!
Quote:I feel amply satisfied that when I next discuss your case and applicable antics with Doc Benwright he will have no problem in categorising you in a more professional manner than I could possibly do.
I find it flattering that you find my psyche so fascinating - but please don't expect me to pay for this second-hand analysis. Any doctor worth his salt would refuse to comment without first-hand knowledge of the patient and his or her history (
as he or she presented it - an incredibly important piece of the puzzle).
Quote:Without the development of normal conscience, the totally unquestionable mind of any human being, being thoroughly unpure by nature, would be enthralled with the dark side of existence and its many rooms. It would become obsessive in its demands for evil, sexual deviations in the name of pleasure and mass homicide could never be ruled out, let alone the odd murder. There would be an open and clear road ahead to carry out the most heinous of crime.
You must be making reference to someone else here. My psychologicals have revealed if anything, an overactive superego - conscience- if you will. Probably as a result, in part, of my devout Christian upbringing. Obviously, I am unable to say to you the type of things you say to me - even though you consistently say them to me because I believe it might hurt your feelings. That's evidence of a conscience.
In terms of being enthralled with the dark side and evil sexual deviations - like Spendius once said- "It aint me babe."
As far as criminal activity goes - I've never even shoplifted or failed to return a library book. I'm telling you - it's that overactive superego thing.
Quote:He further mentioned that some years ago a group of psychiatrists made a thorough study of prominent politicians, militarists, financiers, newspaper owners, and media moguls of varied types, men of great wealth and the privileged.
Conclusions were made that several, (a majority) suffered from mental sickness, several (a majority) could very easily be certified insane.
You and any body else reading this could label those who fall into the categories.
Interesting, but what does that have to do with me? I'm none of those things. I do however find it interesting how you love to categorize. I on the other hand, try my hardest not to. That's why I think you find me to be a Janus type figure. (I did read up on him- and by the way - he wasn't all bad). You seem so hellbent on having people fit one category or another but most people personify many different facets of personality and other innate characteristics. What you call being a Janus might just be a particular person's ability to fully express all the different facets of their personality.
Quote:There are so many considerations to make when you realise just who's fingers are on the 'red button.'
Exactly - that's why I worry so much about my country's willingness to elect someone like George Bush.
Quote:Thankfully you don't have that power.
I'm thankful too - I would never want it.
I thought that picture of the cliffs and sea would have a nice calming effect. Apparently not. Oh well. Once again, though not particularly uplifting in any way - it
has been interesting Mathos.
And it's a gorgeous day. Hope it is for you too....