overutilizing u'r excretionary perogative?
could i recommend a little milk of magnetia here; before it's time 4 preparation 'h'!
milk of magnetia - what you get when you squeeze oppositely charged metal objects really hard
they have 2b spinning; but then everything is spinning.........or is it just me?
The Washington Post's Style Invitational once again asked readers to take
any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing
one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are this year's winners:
1. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you
realize it was your money to start with.
2. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
3. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright
ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign
of breaking own in the near future.
4. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting
laid.
5. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject
financially impotent for an indefinite period.
6. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
7. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit
and the person who doesn't get it.
8. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
9. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.
10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease.
(This one got extra credit.)
11. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really
bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a
serious bummer.
12. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming
only things that are good for you.
13. Glibido: All talk and no action.
14. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they
come at you rapidly.
15. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've
accidentally walked through a spider web.
16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets int your
bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
17. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a grub in the
fruit you're eating.
18. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.
Thanks for the laugh, Andrew.
monosybling--a brother or sister whose vocabulary is limited, or one who has contracted the kissing disease.
Glad you enjoyed it, Letty. I thought monosybling (alternate sp.: monosibling) had something to do with that old chestnut of a phrase "Did your mother hve any children that lived?"
(And, if your name is Rodney Dangerfield, you'd probably answer, "No, my brother was an only child.")
Or a funny thing happened to me on my way to the grave, Andrew.
cryptomologist--one you got his degree in grave digging.
A is driving, b is navigating. A says "I will turn left here?" b replies "right" Is b agreeing or contridicting? Besides correct right and rite have several other meanings. Can we call at least one of the meanings nalz or fhef or some other unused sound? Neil
neil, right.
Leftist- one who is a self made south paw.
Gotta be careful about that phonetic (fonetic?) spelling, though, Neil. 'Rite' and 'right' are two entirely different words.
Hey, Andrew.
Rite on. A Roman catholic jazz musician who is on time for his kid's christening
Panophobia - A unique afflection, er, affliction, attrib. to Ben Affleck meaning "fear of waiting for the reviews of Gigli to come out."
<cav does a segueway into the double pun> After Gigli and J-Lo, Ben should be afraid of everything.
Fellowship of the Ring - Your backup when playing naval battles in your filthy bathtub.
my bathtub is immaculate;
(at least that is my 'conception'!
Cornucopia -- painful growths on one's toes.
New York magazine sponsors a contest each year in which contestants take
a well-known expression in a foreign language, change a single letter,
and provide a definition for the new expression. Here are some winners:
HARLEZ-VOUS FRANCAIS
Can you drive a French motorcycle?
EX POST FUCTO
Lost in the mail
VENI, VIPI, VICI
I came, I'm a very important person, I conquered
COGITO EGGO SUM
I think; therefore I waffle
RIGOR MORRIS
The cat is dead
RESPONDEZ S'IL VOUS PLAID
Honk if you're Scottish
QUE SERA SERF
Life is feudal
LE ROI EST MORT. JIVE LE ROI
The king is dead. No kidding
PRO BOZO PUBLICO
Support your local clown
MONAGE A TROIS
I am three years old
FELIX NAVIDAD
Our cat has a boat
HASTE CUISINE
Fast French food
VENI, VIDI, VICE
I came, I saw, I partied
QUIP PRO QUO
Fast retort
ALOHA OY
Love; greetings; farewell; from such a pain you would never know
VISA LA FRANCE
Don't leave your chateau without it
AMICUS PURIAE
Platonic friend
L'ETAT, C'EST MOO
I'm bossy around here
COGITO, ERGO SPUD
I think, therefore I yam
(OK, more than one letter)
VENI, VIDI, VELCRO
I came, I saw, I stuck around
(OK, another exception)
ICH BIT EIN BERLINER
He deserved it.
ZITGEIST
The Clearasil doesn't quite cover it up.
E PLURIBUS ANUM
Out of any group, there's always one asshole.
"thus spake Zarathustrina"
[Zath; it's your wife, on the phone]
