my 1st relationship, do all relationships go through this?

Ist relationship usually means 1st relationship but rarely does it mean your last or only relationship.
It sounds like it's time for you two to move on.

You are way too young for a long distance relationship like this, especially when it's your first. You will learn that love isn't always enough to hold someone together.

I agree with Bella because I am 21 years old and my b/f is going away next year. I don't know if I should stay with him or stop seeing him.

It doesn't sound like a long distance relationship. It sounds like they live together from the way she worded her post, could be the ambiguous pronoun references.

Are you living together or are you just living in the city or is it neither?

If you are living together, maybe that's the problem. I dont have first hand experience, but I know a lot of otherwise healthy relationships flop because of premature cohabiting. If you aren't living together, but see eachother often, and live in the same city, maybe it really is the relationship that isn't working. If it is long distance, then that is a problem unto itself that most of the time cannot be worked out. And I do have first hand experience with this one. Living far away from somebody makes you wonder if you are even in a relationship at all because of the lack of physical touch.

Let us know how it goes.

Yeah, you'll have to provide some more info.

Do you live together? Did he move with you to a new city just so that the two of you could stay together? Is it long distance?

21 and already in a serious relationship for over a year and a half. Sheesh. You need to date other people! Okay, that's just my opinion.

sorry for the bad wording...
sorry, i didn't make my situation clearer. my boyfriend moved here with me because he had nothing else going on, and some part of him probably wanted to be with me. we stayed together while we traveled for 5 months before school and now he doesn't have a place to stay and i share a room, so we still sleep in his car because we want to be together. romantic, huh? i guess my biggest question is if other relationships that work out for exteneded periods of time (im thinking marriage) go through a stage where youre not really sure if you're right for each other and think about seeing other people. if not, then i guess its time to move on and not waste any more time with each other....right?

I think, perhaps, you know the answer.

echoed

Another echo.

perhaps i do. just trying to convince myself otherwise....

That m'dear is the problem of cohabiting too soon. The idea is to work out most of the "bugs" in a relationship first, decide that you want to be together, and then move in together. IMO, you did it bass ackwards, and now you are realizing that there is not much to this relationship. I think that you realize that you both need to move on.

you know Phoenix, when I was 25 I was sure you had to live together first.Then get married. But what happened was that we never dealt with the important and nasty issues...because we didn't have to. Either one of us could walk away...
But after the marriage all the things we had avoided burst out and it was overwhelming. I wish it had been different.

I suspect that ardor will have an inverse relationship with the mercury in the thermometer.

Your nomadic boyfriend isn't one to compromise with The Establishment, is he?

You poor thing.
I too have a failing relationship. But unlike you, I could never imagine seeing other people, that thought is just painfull, and my bf feels the same way, so we have decided to stay together and see how it goes.

To be honest, if you feel like you want to see other people, then it may be time to split.

If you do decide to end the relationship, your going to look back on it a laugh. It may not seem like it at the time but you will. You learn from your mistakes, so just count this one as a mistake. That's where it seems to be going anyway.

*puts an obstruction to stop echoes*

You guys don't seem all that attached to each other, and he doesn't seem all that attached to the city you're in. If you really are having such frequent doubts about the relationship, it would be best to decide to end it before he settles down in the area, I think. I, though, am a big fan of talking through specific problems with the other person when in a relationship. And I think that the issue of place, which you even brought up in your first post, is something perhaps you two haven't spent much time discussing. See what his plans, hopes, etc. are, tell him honestly how you feel about his being there, and go from there. Don't spend too much time on the "are we right for each other" stuff, because it's not really the most productive conversation to have most of the time.

No, not a mistake, just a learning process. If you had a nice time then be greatfull, dont regret it.

Re: sorry for the bad wording...


Dump this loser. Fast!