Soulmate?

Hmmm....

Maybe a soulmate is someone who you can still stand when all your plans for the future go haywire.....

Not only that boomerang, a soulmate also understands
you without having to explain your thoughts in detail,
he/she can sometimes finish your sentences, because you're so in sync.

It is really not boring to have a soulmate, I see it as something
comfortable, soothing and reassuring.

in love


i loved what you said about relationships.
the "relationships without any passion are pointless because then it is glorified friendship."
im so love with that, i saved it as a quote.
thnx :wink:

yes, but it is important to realize that you along with that, you also cannot build a healthy relationship on only passion. There is a balance.

soulmate
MY HUGE QUESTION IS "are all soulmates your spouses (if you are married?)"

Boomerang's quote (below) is so true. boomerang wrote:
Maybe a soulmate is someone who you can still stand when all your plans for the future go haywire.....

a previous writer wrote a soulemate is "someone to fill in your gaps" and i am saving that also.

i am just wondering b/c i love my spouse and also have many friends! it just seems to me that certain people know your heart before it is opened and your thoughts before they are spoken. that is a soulmate to me!

speak your ideas, people, and let me know what you think. good night!

daniellejean and tahiti.... i both agree with both of ur definitions of love! so true!

Re: soulmate


Yes, my "soulmate" is my husband. I knew we were going to be married very early on in the relationship and after meeting me he went home to tell his mom he'd met the girl he was going to marry.

A soulmate can be summed up best in the book (or movie) The Notebook. There is a part in the movie (I don't have the book in front of me so the internet movie search will have to suffice!) where Noah and Alli have this conversation:


Young Noah: It's not about following your heart and it's not about keeping your promises. It's about security.

Young Allie: What's that supposed to mean?

Young Noah: [yelling] Money. He?s got a lot of money!

Young Allie: You smug bastard. I hate you for saying that.

Young Noah: You're bored Allie. You're bored and you know it. You wouldn't be here if you weren't.

Young Allie: You arrogant son of a bitch.

Young Noah: Would you just stay with me?

Young Allie: Stay with you? What for? Look at us, we're already fightin'

Young Noah: Well that's what we do, we fight... You tell me when I am being an arrogant son of a bitch and I tell you when you are a pain in the ass. Which you are, 99% of the time. I'm not afraid to hurt your feelings. You have like a 2 second rebound rate, then you're back doing the next pain-in-the-ass thing.

Young Allie: So what?

Young Noah: So it's not gonna be easy. It's gonna be really hard. We're gonna have to work at this every day, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, for ever, you and me, every day. Will you do something for me, please? Just picture your life for me? 30 years from now, 40 years from now? What's it look like? If it's with him, go. Go! I lost you once, I think I can do it again. If I though that's what you really wanted. But don't you take the easy way out.

A soulmate is someone who sees all your warts but still thinks you look like a princess or a prince.

Re: soulmate


I love you Bella!! Omg- that movie- the Notebook, when i saw it.. it's just like all my problems suddenly got solved.
It's sad that I broke up with my boyfriend before I saw it though, and it was because of the little arguements we had...
I guess I just didnt understand it all then..
But now.. I've learned and..

No matter how much he wants me back now, I beleive that if we broke up, then we werent meant to be, so now I'll just move on to whoever God planned for me next

But that movie... whoever hasnt seen it yet- SEE IT!!
It'll open your eyes to a whole new world.. where love ISNT a happily ever after fairytale..
love has its flaws.. nothing is perfect, and no relationship can be perfect.
And the movie explans that.
Thanks for sharing that with everyone else Bella Dea!

Soul mates... Hmmm... This is an interesting topic. I always believed there was umm... ahem... "the one". I believed "the one" was someone who would see me for what I am on the inside. Who wouldn't judge me because of my past. Someone I could connect with intellectually. Someone who shared all my hopes and dreams. Who wanted the same things out of life as I do. I had always thought it was up to me to find him. I went to great lengths to search out this person. Only to be frustrated and disappointed time and time again.

I was desperate and lonely for many years. I felt incomplete because I hadn't found "the one". I would give up for awhile then try again going through this unending cycle of disappointment. Then through a series of events about a year and a half ago when three out of four hurricanes hit where I was living I hit rock bottom. The hurricanes had stolen everything that was dear to me. Everything I felt I needed to get by in this world. Over the next few months I became more and more angry but I couldn't find a source for the anger. It got so bad that I was on the verge of losing my job because I was quickly becoming inconsolable.

For the first time in my life I went to a phsychiatrist of my own free will because I was scared to death of how I was feeling. During the first session he said something that I still don't remember, but it triggered something in my brain. The tide began to turn. The second session I shared with him the things I was beginning to realize and he was like, "Uh huh." By the third session I had found the source of the problem which was I had an enormous need to feel needed. Everything I did in my life was based out of this need. If I didn't feel I was going to be needed in a situation I wouldn't get involved, because I had nothing to gain. When the hurricanes came and took all the things that were dear to me I was no longer surrounded by things that needed me, which left me feeling completely empty inside.

So I shared all this when I went in for my last session. He sat back in his chair and gazed at me thoughtfully for the longest time. He was quiet and as most of us know... silence kills me. I started thinking, "Rut ro... does he think I'm nuts? Am I going to be sent to the funny farm now?" Then in a very soft voice he said to me, "You know, I can honestly say you are the first person I've ever met that has had such a deep connection with who they are. I have never had someone come in here and tell ME what their problem was. Instead it has usually taken months of therapy for them to allow me to help them see the source of their problem. I am amazed. I can see a difference in you from the first day you walked in here and can tell that that discovering this has helped you. We can continue on with the sessions if you like, but I really don't think you need them."

In the weeks that followed I began to realize that the reason I was so desperate to find "the one" was because deep inside I had always felt that was the only way I would ever truly feel needed and complete. Had I gotten married before I saw all this about myself it would have been a catastrophe. I would have never been pleased with my husband because I would have been expecting him to fill my need to feel needed. Those are some pretty big shoes to fill... For the first time in my life I stopped feeling like I "needed" to find "the one". I had a really nice guy from work ask me out and everything was going great. We had a good time no matter what we did, but I just wasn't connecting with him. I felt like I should be but it just wasn't there, so we went on our separate ways.

Then a few months later I met my husband. He is everything I hoped for and more. Had we met any sooner though I don't think I would have been able to see that. Don't get me wrong... we're not skippin through any fields of flowers hand in hand. Our relationship has brought with it a lot of work. ACK. He makes me so friggin mad sometimes! (as I'm sure I do him) LOL But I know that he loves me. This is a first for me. I had never felt secure in the love of any person before. Not even my parents. To allow someone this close to me has been a trying experience. It's feels really scary sometimes. But it's changing me somehow, and I believe it's changing him too. We've had our share of differences. Some pretty major ones actually. But through open communication, so far, we've been able to get past those things and move on. So yeah, I do believe he is my soul-mate and that we were destined to be together.

It's very tempting for me to believe in a lot of this "idealistic" stuff because it's just so nice but the idea of a unique soul mate just doesn't seem quite right to me. Life seems too diverse and there appear to be too many people out there that I could make unique, amazing connections with given the right circumstance (which is clearly vital). There are undoubtedly a group of people who we're each capable of clicking with more than others, I just don't feel as though there is one person for everyone.

I feel like I'd be setting myself up for a world of pain if I didn't try to move with the ebb and flow of life, being grateful for each interesting person I meet and being aware that life isn't perfect so relationships, love and marriage are unlikely to be either. You just can't build this picture up in your mind of a partner who personifies perfection and absolute union. Whether that person exists or not is almost irrelevant, you need to live in the moment and do away with any pre conceived ideas, how do you feel inside, now, as you're in their presence, that's all that matters. (The danger here is losing a sense of perspective, love is blind anyone?)

Also, ideal partners should form a great double act, balance is everything. Given how we can all better ourselves in certain areas and how we're all lacking in others, husbands/wives should be people with who we are best suited to attaining a kinder, more loving, balanced nature. So again, given the diverse nature of, for example, myself and the people I come across, I feel one person might subtly channel me in one direction while another person with differing qualities might another etc. There isn't necessarily a better or worse path if they're both essentially "good".

Just a few thoughts anyway, not sure how well they flow with what's been said above now.

If only coach put me in fourth quarter, we would have won state, I just know it. Things would have been different. I would have gone pro, and I'd be living in a big ol' house, soakin it up in the hot tub with my soulmate.

I betcha I can throw a football over those mountains.

I always thought opposites attract. A couple complements each other i.e. Your negatives are filled by your partner filled with his/her positives.

I used to believe "soulmate". But recently I gradually objected that idea: I found my "soulmate" whom I kept writing letters to and whom I felt overwhelming feelings like heart-pounding and breath-shortening, was actually, my lover. And so all my theories about "soulmate" or "communication partner" were merely frabricated out of my pro-asceticism nature, the inclination to live out of restricts, also, a speck of concern about the public.