Things that you only feel comfortable telling a stranger...

So at this point you were obviously fighting an erection.

Actually, you probably weren't fighting it.

PART II:

The old man continues telling me about his nephew's idea. "He told me that they pay older gentlemen to have sex with young asian men..."

My jaw drops. He goes on...

"So I did it. It's a fairly new, hot niche in gay porn. They pay $25,000 per movie, and all you have to do is service the young man, and you know, it's not really that hard..."

I am laughing nervously, eyes wide open, shocked at this seemingly sweet old man as he goes into even more detail...

"...you just have to get used to giving head and having a penis in your mouth--and you know, I don't really think about it--you just give head to a young asian guy, and then sometimes they want to shoot it all over your face, but really, that isn't even all that bad..."

More nervous laughter from me. "Wait a second," I said. "Are you gay?"

"Well, I guess I am now, since I'm doing this, but I was straight all during my life, I was married, and now it's just something I do. It simply keeps life interesting."

"But when you're alone, do you think of men or women?"

"When I'm alone...I don't think about either one," he says, shrugging. "I've done five or six of these pictures, and made a good chunk of money. I prefer to give head to the manly muscular guys and not the real girly fag-types...and you know, it isn't that hard servicing a man...there is a certain technique..."

He starts to make a gesture as he speaks, raising his hand up to his mouth in a pantomime of oral sex, and it is at this point that I finally interrupt him and tell him that I don't want to hear the details please, because, although I am open-minded, the details kind of repulse me.

He laughs, and thankfully, he stops. A few minutes later, after the subject turns back to more mundane things like the symptoms of his old age and my mid-life conundrum, the conversation peters out and he walks off, leaving me stunned and bewildered and wondering what kind of wisdom can be gleaned from this, the single weirdest conversation I've ever had with a stranger.

What little piece of wisdom do you think I can take from this chance encounter?

Have you ever had a similar encounter with a stranger? I guess the anonymity of a stranger is perfect for disclosures of this kind.

A new career opportunity just dropped in your lap and you let it walk away.
Shame on you.

Do you think he was trying to recruit you Kicky?

GW, I have thought about that, and I guess I will never know. I don't think so. I think he just wanted to tell someone. I'm not sure about that though.

One of the things I got from this is that you can never, ever, really know what's going on in another person's head. Everyone has secrets, but I wonder how many people have completely secret lives, like this guy. If you would have seen this guy, you would NEVER expect him to be involved with anything like that. Bizarre.

This could become a true confessions thread:

I once had a woman tell me she kept her dead cat in the freezer. He had been there for 8 years because she didn't know where to bury him in Manhattan.

Welcome to the ethnographic experience, that's what fieldwork is like. Except it occurred in your own culture on a mundane afternoon in the middle of nowhere in particular.

The only pearl of wisdom I can offer, and it isn't much, is that this culture is changing in ways and at speeds we cannot imagine, and we are all becoming strangers in our own home.

Wait...so you're serious?

I was waiting for the "my name is Gus" punchline or something.

I don't know...if you're for real, I bet he was hitting on you. You're very young to an 84 year old.

$25,000 a pop? That sounds pretty far-fetched, but what the hell do I know. Apparently I now know young asians have a thing for old guys blowing them.

I think Kicky is turning into Gus.....

I'm not kidding. I was blown away (pun intended). I thought he might be hitting on me too, but for god's sake, the guy was 84 years old! How do you still have the sex drive to go up and try to hit on some stranger at that age! I just got this feeling that he was just a bored old guy who wanted to talk. I agree with Slappy though, that $25k does seem like a lot of money to pay for this service. I guess it would be hard to find people for stuff like that though.

I think he was either hitting on you or getting his jollies. That whole wide-eyed thing. Could be a) shock the square jollies (little did HE know that you're so not square) or b) flasher-type jollies, just verbally-based.

$25,000 sounds way suspicious to me, too.

Damn, I'd really like to believe that he was actually doing something like that, just because that would give the story the highest rating on the f*cked-up and bizarre scale. If it wasn't true, then I really hope he was just getting his jollies by making up this crazy story. That would be something I could really respect.

Just hitting on me? God I hope not. That would be so ordinary, comparatively speaking, even though he was an 84-year-old man. So I choose to believe that he wasn't.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to have to go google "salaries for old man/young asian gay porn" to check out that $25,000 figure now.

What a conversation...I wasn't there to hear it, but It sounds to me as if he was pulling your leg.

Did this old guy, by any chance, have a white beard, wear overalls and carry a pitchfork? Did he ever use the words "capybara" or "swamp" in your conversation?

Fitty bucks says it was Gus.

I dunno.

Well, what don't I know.. I don't know that people of 84 are are any different than the rest of us. They are just more crinckled and tend to be crabby when you try to order them around.

Once you're 64, 84 isn't impossible.

Once you're 44, 56 isn't,

and so forth.

.....But when you're 79, 69 becomes quite difficult. Creaky limbs and all that.

That is a very sobering thought. Damn you, Ellpus.

I think at 84 you dont have the hang ups you have when you are 24,34.
When your younger I suppose we all try to do whats expected of us, fit in, impress people, get an education, get a job, get a house, get married have kids etc but at 84, and a widower he probably thought, well Ive done everything,Im on my own, I dont have to fit in and certainly at 84 I doubt he is bothered by what people think of him so he gave it a go.
If he did earn $24,000 a blow...er I mean a go, then good on him, beats being left in a puddle of your own urine in an old people home for the rest of your life.

I hope he was telling the truth, and Im sure he was trying to recruit you, or at least get you to buy one of his movies.
Did you get his autograph?

Plus, you guys are all strangers to me, I tell you things Id never tell my friends.