Getting to know a divorced woman/single mom for marriage

If her kids are another person's responsibility, then they won't be a burden on you, now, will they?

Methinks your friends don't know shinola about relationships after, say, age 30 or so.

Firstly, you’ve only talked together…not yet met in-person. A bit premature for long term considerations. See whether on not when you meet if you’re compatible. Decision such as whether or not she is suitable for marriage is far too early.

Don’t listen to other people’s opinions as they’re not the ones who will deal with repercussions.

Furthermore , her kids are her and her ex-hubbys responsibilities. Is he being a good parent now?

When you marry mom, you marry the kids. If you can't handle that, do that mom and those kids a big favor and shove off.

You don't give us enough context to go on, Jack. How old are you two? How long have you been "talking", and why? Where do the two of you live? How old are her children? Is she providing for them? Is the father involved, financially and emotionally? How long have they been divorced/separated? (Makes a difference - 3 yrs vs 3 months, for example). Are you working?

Why are you thinking marriage so soon in this 'relationship'? Have you ever met her or her kids?

Of course kids can be a 'burden' to someone who has never had them. The noise alone can drive a person nuts. They could be rebellious or stubborn. They could resent or hate you, even. They could be juvenile delinquents. It's also different if they're in their teens vs in their infancy. Infancy means you'll have the next 20 years helping raise and support them; teens mean they'll like want little to do with you but will soon be out of the house. Teens are more expensive, by the way.

Please provide more context.

My guess on his age, based on his nickname, is that he’s about 32 or 33 yrs of age. Waiting for OP.

Furthermore, if OP knew she had 4 kids when he started this relationship, what did he have in mind?

Yes, what did he have in mind indeed. So the youngest has to be at least 5 or 6 if they've been separated for 6 years. Cute age, but does a 30-something want to take that on, much less the older ones?