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Has anyone dealt with biting or something similar during sex?

 
 
Salfet8
 
Reply Sun 6 Nov, 2022 03:36 pm
Bf and I have been dating around 9 months. Before him I have never even heard of guys doing this and don’t really know what to think. He is 25, I’m 21.

Early in our relationship he started biting me during sex when he was really into it, which was fine because it wasn’t that hard. Couple of times it was really hard. The last time he did it when we were first dating it was bruised bad and looked horrible. I showed it up him and told him he can’t do it that hard, he apologized and said he wouldn’t and didn’t for a long time.

He has been getting back into it more lately. Couple days ago he did it the hardest he ever has. I have this horrible mark on the back of my neck around shoulder. I had to resist the urge to hit him when he was doing it. It is really bad and hurts. I looked at it the next day and got mad. Told him angrily that he just can’t do it that hard. If someone sees it idk what they would think.

He apologized. Said he doesn’t realize when he is really into it and compared it to a hickey. So I have been kind of annoyed with him and he has been sulking, says I embarrassed him and could have just talked to him without being angry. I have never dealt with anything like this so I’m not sure where to go from here. I like semi rough sex as much as the next person but imo it’s just too far. I know everyone has their certain kinks, whatever. He is annoying me saying we will just have vanilla sex from now on. He can do whatever he wants but when I’m in pain for a week after and have to hides bruises/injuries, I don’t like it. I don’t think I’m being unreasonable. I want us to make up but also don’t want him to do it so hard. Has anyone dealt with something like this?
 
Mame
 
  2  
Reply Sun 6 Nov, 2022 04:07 pm
@Salfet8,
I don't know why you didn't hit him when he was doing it. I sure would have, especially if he already knew you didn't like it. May be time for you to let someone else suffer. Maybe he needs a cloth stuffed in his mouth before you get started?
Salfet8
 
  0  
Reply Sun 6 Nov, 2022 04:38 pm
@Mame,
I have never hit anything in my life
Mame
 
  3  
Reply Sun 6 Nov, 2022 04:42 pm
@Salfet8,
Well, shove him off... I didn't mean violence, per se. Shove him off, try to get away, scream.
0 Replies
 
jespah
 
  3  
Reply Sun 6 Nov, 2022 05:03 pm
@Salfet8,
Er, why can he do whatever he wants? Is this a dom/sub relationship? And even if it is, usually those don't result in serious physical injury if the parties have made it clear what their boundaries are/have a safe word and abide by it.

This just sounds like a dude who doesn't seem to give a damn about consequences.
Salfet8
 
  -2  
Reply Sun 6 Nov, 2022 06:30 pm
@jespah,
No, nothing like that just my boyfriend. It’s been 6 or 7 times and has become an issue again. Yeah I don’t understand it at all. I get upset after for sure
0 Replies
 
neptuneblue
 
  3  
Reply Sun 6 Nov, 2022 08:10 pm
@Salfet8,
Oh I see. He's making YOU feel guilty because he hurt you. Then piles on even more manipulation. See through this ploy as it really is - he's taking advantage of you and has borderline abusive tendencies.

You are NOT being unreasonable asking your partner not to hurt you. Yet he continues the same pattern.

The purpose of dating is for compatibility. To me, this is not compatible behavior. I'd drop him and fast. Before he thinks other abusive practices are ok.
0 Replies
 
izzythepush
 
  3  
Reply Mon 7 Nov, 2022 10:16 am
@Salfet8,
Next time bite his cock really hard, not a John Wayne Bobbitt, but enough to require medical attention.

See how he feels about "vanilla" sex after that.
roger
 
  2  
Reply Mon 7 Nov, 2022 10:55 am
@izzythepush,
Now, why didn't I think of that?
izzythepush
 
  2  
Reply Mon 7 Nov, 2022 11:44 am
@roger,
Next time it happens you know what to do.
Mame
 
  2  
Reply Mon 7 Nov, 2022 11:46 am
@izzythepush,
LMAO

Yeah, Roger... bite it really hard!
0 Replies
 
Below viewing threshold (view)
bobsal u1553115
 
  1  
Reply Tue 8 Nov, 2022 09:36 pm
Yes. But if I can remember the 'safe' word, I seldom get arrested.
0 Replies
 
bobsal u1553115
 
  1  
Reply Tue 8 Nov, 2022 09:39 pm
@Salfet8,
Quote:
I have never hit anything in my life


Never, ever in your life? Yeah, right.
Below viewing threshold (view)
bobsal u1553115
 
  2  
Reply Sat 12 Nov, 2022 05:58 pm
@wbg1,
If you find that to be true in your life, you are not paying attention to other people. Cut it out before you find yourself in communication with the local constabulary.
0 Replies
 
Lash
 
  1  
Reply Sun 13 Nov, 2022 07:37 am
I once absent-mindedly bit a small hole in the shoulder of a lover. Right or wrong, I took it as a sign I was extraordinary in the sack that he didn’t mention it until we were done.
0 Replies
 
 

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