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Found texts from my boyfriend to another girl

 
 
Reply Mon 17 May, 2021 12:34 pm
So I checked my boyfriend’s texts last night while he was asleep. I found texts to a girl that he was talking about having sex with her. From the texts I gather he hasn’t had sex with her yet. She does know about me but I do not know her. He tells her goodnight and good morning most days. We are supposed to go on vacation next week when I’m supposed to meet his family. We have been together for 7 months. I don’t know if I should just tell him I know and leave him before meeting his family. I don’t know if I have a right to be upset because he hasn’t done anything but just the thought of the lack of respect and disloyalty bothers me.
 
izzythepush
 
  4  
Reply Mon 17 May, 2021 12:48 pm
@Nicki88887,
There’s no trust, he’s cheating on you emotionally and you’re going behind his back to check his phone.

And it’s only 7 months.

It really doesn’t sound like a healthy relationship.

You might be able to salvage something, but you need to talk to him honestly.
0 Replies
 
jespah
 
  3  
Reply Mon 17 May, 2021 12:49 pm
It's all over but the shouting.
0 Replies
 
Medusax
 
  1  
Reply Thu 27 May, 2021 09:25 pm
@Nicki88887,
He hasn't "done anything" yet, perhaps, but he will.....
Mame
 
  2  
Reply Thu 27 May, 2021 11:45 pm
@Medusax,
I'm with the others. Why would you be checking his phone? No trust. Why would he be engaging with someone else? I'd be running from that guy.
maxdancona
 
  0  
Reply Fri 28 May, 2021 11:04 am
@Nicki88887,
It's a rare case we all agree. You need to find someone with whom you don't feel the need to check up on (or at least someone who knows how to password protect his phone).

DTMFA

0 Replies
 
Linkat
 
  1  
Reply Fri 28 May, 2021 11:12 am
@Mame,
Mame wrote:

I'm with the others. Why would you be checking his phone? No trust. Why would he be engaging with someone else? I'd be running from that guy.


Agreed also.

On a side note, you must have had a reason or an inkling something was up to check his phone - thus the mistrust on your side? Unless you simply do lack trust in general.

And quite honestly 7 months is not that long - better to end now than to get deeper into this relationship.

I would be just upfront - say I did not trust you so I looked at your phone - yep I am wrong for invading your privacy (which you are wrong for doing this) - I see we do not have trust on either side so we should end this.

And why the heck would you want to go away with anyone if you know they are cheating even if it is emotionally and not physically?
maxdancona
 
  1  
Reply Fri 28 May, 2021 11:52 am
@Linkat,
Quote:
On a side note, you must have had a reason or an inkling something was up to check his phone


There is no excuse for spying on your girlfriend or boyfriend. This is unacceptable behavior in any adults relationship.
Linkat
 
  1  
Reply Fri 28 May, 2021 12:16 pm
@maxdancona,
maxdancona wrote:

Quote:
On a side note, you must have had a reason or an inkling something was up to check his phone


There is no excuse for spying on your girlfriend or boyfriend. This is unacceptable behavior in any adults relationship.


I agree - just pointing out that I am guessing she was already distrustful of him.
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