Wed 25 Nov, 2020 05:32 pm
The last few weeks have been a nightmare. A few members of my immediate family have contracted the Covid virus and one of them has been hospitalized. In addition, my cat of 17 years almost died the other night from congestive heart failure. First, the vet told me that he has cardiomyopathy and a very damaged heart so he may not survive long and now they called tonight to tell me the x-rays also reveal what they believe to be lung cancer. I don’t know how he could have both since the cardio that was positive that the heart failure was to only due to the heart and there is nothing else to be concerned about. Either way it’s extremely upsetting especially because I lost my husband of 30 years to lung cancer almost 9 years ago. Ironically, our cat gave him comfort towards the end and gave me and my children a lot of comfort since losing my husband (their father) and one of my grown children said when something happens to the cat he doesn’t know how he’s going to go on since he has been biggest source of comfort for him besides myself. Needless to say, I’m very concerned about my son who also has autism. It’s also very disturbing that my boyfriend of over a year has consistently said I should put the cat down even before this prior episode. He’s not particularly a cat lover but he is generally gentle to my cat. He always feels that the cat is more trouble than it’s worth because of his age but particularly now and and telling me that unless I want the cat to suffer I should put him down now. While this may or may not be true what’s troubling me is that he can’t be more supportive but would rather be dictatorial. I haven’t seen my boyfriend in a few weeks because he also is Covid positive but I’m concerned that after this weekend he’s going to want to see me and to be truthful I just don’t want to see him right now I just can’t deal with him telling me what to do or strongly suggesting what to do especially with the cat I just don’t need that kind of pressure right now. I know it doesn’t sound nice but I really don’t miss him at this point and I really don’t want to see him. I got my hands full worrying about my family and now my cat and all the bad memories of when my husband was dying Thanksgiving 9 years ago. He passed less than two months after that. Should I tell my boyfriend that I just need time by myself for a while and not worry about if his feelings are hurt? It’s a shame that I can’t find comfort with him and it’s making me feel that he’s just not the right person for me at least not now. I don't want to throw my bf under the bus but can't he at least say once "I'm sorry to hear about the cat"; he does ask about my family members who are sick at least.
Your boyfriend has Covid. He should be isolating at home. Period, end of story.
As for how insensitive he's been, is he the only man in the county?
This will sound insensitive, but it is truly sad that a dying animal can mean more to us than anyone or anything else in the world.
No shame in it. A lot of us have been there. It sucks.