Meeting him tomorrow, but doubting everything...

I broke up with him in a very crude manner because he did something I didnt like. I think he lied to me but because I was so furious and used a bit of foul language during the breakup, I didnt really listen to his explanations. I regret having talked to him in that way.

One week later I sent him a text saying that i don’t want to fight anymore and that I want to speak like friends (I chickened out.. couldn’t write I want him to be my bf again) to which he agreed.

But apparently he was so upset about my behaviour that he spontaneously booked a trip to his home country where he wants to be alone by the sea. I suggested I come to him for my birthday when he is back and he agreed and even suggested to pick me up (he lives an hour away from my town, so basically he was willing to drive a long way to only pick me up and then drive all the way back).

But still he seemed distant and it was always me to initiate contact. I guess he was still hurt. So I called him a couple of days later and apologised for my tone and way of speaking. He said he is not mad and understands my behaviour. Then he suggested to discuss this face to face when he is back. I agreed but he never made exact plans so once again it was me who set a plan to which he just replied ‘sure’. I then asked him where he wants to talk and he left my text on read. It has been 3 days now without a reply.

My birthday was yesterday and he didnt wish me happy birthday. Nothing. The meeting is supposed to be tomorrow. Also he will arrive back from his home country tomorrow and is or was still willing to come all the way to me to talk which I thought was a good sign.

But now I just dont know what to do or think anymore…. shall I send him another text tomorrow to ask if the meeting will still take place?