Is this behavior normal for your immigrant culture? I’m only asking because I cannot for the life of me understand why you would accept this behavior as it is now - or even think that he could possibly ever get better in the future.
There are some deep down flaws in this guy that are so disturbing , so if you try to pursue this, your life will be miserable.
Don’t give him credit for being a “ good dad.” You don’t know the quality of the relationship he brings to the child he babysits.
Poor hygiene? Deep in debt? No job? No house? No car? No credit? No sex?
(And, oh yeah, the birthday stunt he pulled was very revealing.
Yikes! Get away ASAP.
PS is it that important that you have a relationship only with a man of your culture? Rethink that confining rule.