15 Biblical Ways To Acquire a Wife & other Jokes

how can we post pics?

i have a cartoon pic about a missionary in africa.

since this seems to be the official "humor at the expense of all things biblical" thread - maybe i could post it here.

If you have a pc, you can go to forum help and see the thread on how to post an image.

For a mac:

1-Find a picture you like on the net. The following procedure will work with most images.

2-Press the control key, and then place your cursor on the image and click, release control button.

3-A window should appear, with cursor click on the one that asks: image in new window

4-A new page should appear with the image by itself.

A-Go up to browser, and gently from right to left highlight the address that appears there.

B-Go up to edit and click on copy.

5-Go to the thread you want to post the picture in, and choose to post (or reply).

A-In the page look up at the features and click on the one that is [img] a small window should appear.

B-Erase the words that are already there, and place cursor in the window, go to edit and click on paste, the address should appear in the window.

C-Add text if you want, and summit, the image should appear

Hope that helps

er... will someone please download this pic from teh site where i have uploaded it and then post it here .

(i couldnt figure out much from that 10 page thread)

http://s15.yousendit.com/d.aspx?id=12NZT50GL2NCU1GAN333N12M80

Sister Mathematical & Sister Logical
 
Two nuns went out of the convent to sell cookies. One of them is known as Sister Mathematical (SM) and the other one is known as Sister Logical (SL). It is getting dark and they are still far away from the convent.
SL: Have you noticed that a man has been following us for the past half-hour?

SM: Yes, I wonder what he wants.

SL: It's logical. He wants to have his way with us.

SM: Oh, no! At this rate he will reach us in 15 minutes at the most. What can we do?

SL: The only logical thing to do of course is that we have to start walking faster.

SM: It is not working.

SL: Of course it is not working. The man did the only obvious thing to do. He started to walk faster too.

SM: So, what shall we do? At this rate he will reach us in one minute.

SL: The only logical thing we can do is split. You go that way and I'll go this way. He cannot follow both of us.

So the man decided to go after Sister Logical.

Sister Mathematical arrives at the convent and is worried because Sister Logical has not yet arrived. Finally, Sister Logical arrives.

SM: Sister Logical! Thank God you are here! Tell us what happened!

SL: The only logical thing happened. The man could not follow both of us, so he followed me.

SM: So, what happened? Please tell us.

SL: The only logical thing to happen. I started to run as fast as I could.

SM: So what happened?

SL: The only logical thing to happen. The man also started to run as fast as he could.

SM: And what else?

SL: The only logical thing to happen. He reached me.

SM: Oh, no! What did you do then?

SL: The only logical thing to do. I lifted my dress up.

SM: Oh, Sister. What did the man do?

SL: The only logical thing to do. He pulled down his pants.

SM: Oh, no! What happened then?

SL: Isn't it logical, Sister? A nun with her dress up can run faster than a man with his pants down!

hahahahhhahaha

er could you download the pic ?

No, I don't download from the net to my files sorry.

http://www.fp.ucalgary.ca/dmpeers/missionary%20influence.JPG

http://www2.ida.net/graphics/shirtail/missionary_cartoon.jpg

http://www.christianchallenge.org/images/Cartoon.jpg

http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.resi.at/resi-nr/homedirs/waniek/africa_cartoon.JPG&imgrefurl=http://www.resi.at/resi-nr/homedirs/waniek/jokes.htm&h=563&w=425&sz=107&tbnid=XhTrEHZcxIMJ:&tbnh=131&tbnw=98&hl=en&start=119&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dafrica%2Bcartoon%26start%3D100%26svnum%3D10%26hl%3Den%26lr%3D%26sa%3DN



the last of these links shows the pic i had uploaded in www.yousendit.com

Those are great brahmin, thanks.

welcome.

Technology Church
politics
19 Mar 2005 01:38 pm by Pete


Some people have a real problem keeping their normal day-to-day lives just ticking over. Simple things like paying bills, ringing old friends, buying cake or baking bread can quickly become confusing and difficult to achieve.

The church thinks it has the answer for you, in a new campaign launched this week from Christian Head Quarters - Rome. The campaign entitled 'Be organised with Jesus' is the life work of the eminent Bishop-Lord CrissKross (who you might remember from the string of hits he had in the 1980's - 'jump for Jesus', 'jump higher for Jesus', 'if you're tired sit down for Jesus now' and 'if you think that's high enough you've not seen Jesus jump').

CrissKross's team of scientists has developed a compact PC based organiser that is powerful, good-looking and very holy. It boasts a range of features that will have technology writers dribbling;

- runs of mains electricity or wind (whichever is the strongest)
- can store up to 10,000 hymns or equivalent manuscript
- can help you pay bills (it decides who to pay and when without any configuring
- rings old friends and chats without any configuring
- will keep you in touch with salvation through it's Universal Vatican Bus (UVB) wireless network connection (download the latest Saam or grab an updated bible episode)

The device will be named the 'JesusisawizPod' for the full sized version and 'JizPod' for the smaller compact edition.

John Macintosh, inventor of the iPod, iMac and Vimto has rebuked the holy innovation saying, 'This thing will only do things the church thinks is right. It's crazy. I do like the name of it though.'

Maximumlies will review it the moment it hit's the high street church shops!