i think you just answered your own question...when you arent scared anymore that things won't ever be the same is when you can move on. you will never be over her, just capable of accepting that it won't be the same and move on.
You grow, you change, you love, you lose and then you meet someone really special who feels the same about you and dollface from high school, college, whatever, becomes a sweet but faded memory. Your past.
Continuing to hold onto dead relationships because it seems romantic or proves that you truly loved serves no purpose. New relationships cannot grow if you're still wasting your time mourning the old ones.
I envy those people who are bitter and jaded about this whole experience and can forget so easily.
oh sugar, I hope you're not directing that at me. I'm not bitter nor jaded. I'm a happily married woman who got over my past loves and was eventually blessed with finding the real thing. But if i continued to cry and whine and hold onto the ghosts of my past, my first love and the one after that and the one after that, my eyes nor my head would have never been clear enough to have found the gem that I have today.
I hope you learn from you experiences and your mistakes. Good luck to you.
<points at eoe's post and nods emphatically>
<both of 'em, actually>
I mean, allow yourself to grieve, certainly. You can't be expected to bounce back immediately.
Those of us who have gone through it probably didn't forget "so easily." We've forgotten, or have moved on, but the time it took us to do so probably varied. It took me a full summer of wallowing to get over my first major breakup.
Then I moved on.
