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Tue 20 Aug, 2019 06:39 am
This is an update to my last post on this forum.
My ex, who I dumped without explanation five years ago, had been open and responsive to me, albeit understandably very hurt. I was such a sack of **** to her.
If you would like some background information, feel free to read through my other post.
Anyway, I sent her this apology:
(Her name), I'm really sorry to have cut you off in such a way, without explanation, and not being fair and honest to you. I behaved like a coward and an egoist. My behavior towards you was appalling and insensitive. I always doubted your feelings, and at the time, I thought it was the best way for me. I am sorry for all the pain and the hurt that I inflicted on you during all these years of questions and distress. During all these years I thought only of you, the morning when I woke up, throughout the day, the evening you are in my thoughts, in my heart. I do not know what you think and feel. (Her name) whatever happens know that I only wish you happiness in your life.
It’s been a week and she hasn’t answer. I fully understand why she hasn’t - it’s likely that she’s completely done.
What I’m struggling with is that she’s been really frank with me since I’ve been in touch: telling me openly about her feelings and how she’s been.
I thought that maybe she would have something to say back... if it was to tell me to **** off or tell me to stop contacting her.
@Occitanie,
The maths doesn't work out. Your only other post is from November of last year when you talk about your current girlfriend.
There's no way to shoehorn 5 years into that.
Just going on this post, I'd leave the poor girl alone and let her move on with her life, she is under no obligation to get back in touch with you.
@Occitanie,
My ex NPD GF used to write contradictory stuff like that to me.
So sorry, had to leave, think of you constantly, have a nice life.
There’s no obligation from her after reading this apology.
She has heard you.
What did you expect? Your apology sounded insincere and reeks of an ulterior motive, like you were so sure she would come running back.
Why are you asking for a drubbing? Doesn't five years of silence tell you everything you need to know? She's over you and you need to be over her.
@bobsal u1553115,
I agree with this.
(stick around for a while, bobsal you done been missed)
@Sturgis,
I really PO'd someone. I think we've all cooled out over it. I've missed a lot of people here. You're one of them.
@bobsal u1553115,
Quote:Why are you asking for a drubbing? Doesn't five years of silence tell you everything you need to know? She's over you and you need to be over her.
Maybe he’s asking for absolution.
But he’s struggling way too hard to see himself as better than what he did.
I do that once in awhile too.
@Leadfoot,
Well maybe he should learn better manners. Perhaps she thinks he doesn't deserve absolution, and if that's the case, I'm inclined to agree.
@Leadfoot,
She hasn't offered absolution and doesn't seem to need any more closure herself in five years, its time for him to move on. She's under no obligation to relieve him of his responsibility to come to his own peace. In fact there's a fair bit of passive aggression in his move to contact her if she's in another relationship. She does not want contact and he should respect that.
I guess what I’m trying to say is, he’s not asking the right party for forgiveness.
And being insincere at the same time.
@Leadfoot,
I think you're right. He needs to forgive himself, and if he's sincere, he wouldn't be adding more static to her life.
@Occitanie,
I’m a bit confused about your time frames here. Last year you talk about somebody that you were seeing last June. Now you’re talking about somebody you broke up with five years ago. What am I missing here?
@Ragman,
Not a thing. we're just ignoring it.
@Occitanie,
New to this site and not sure how to post my own topic sorry to reply on this but something has been in my mind a lot
I have been getting a massage a few times a month from a place down the street from my house, it always seemed a little bit shady but never went to any sexual level which I liked since I have a fiancé. But the other day when I was laying on my back she remove the towel and got very close to my area but nothing happened. I went back again a few days later because it is a great massage and close to home , And this time laying on my back once again the towel is removed and she was massaging my inner thighs when all the sudden she poured oil all over me and started jerking me off after about literally five seconds I said no thank you and she seemed confused and then tried it again. The question is do I tell my fiancé and was that considered cheating I’m just very confused and yes I did tell her twice to stop and I never had an orgasm and won’t be going back