Never Marry a REALLY Hot Men?

Mathos, thank you.

For Injecting A Sweet Black Poison at this juncture.

I'll say that if both the man and the woman aren't alternatively ready to be handcuffed and shackled by their mate, they have not reached the highest point. I might even go as far as to say I'd question the depth of their Love for one another.

Note above I don't say they must do it to Love. Not at all. But have the mindset of being willing to do it, if it might be asked.

Being in the position above, my friends, is a Trust in the one you Love, sometimes darkly. To deny the dark side is be destroyed by it (if I may borrow from Star Wars that borrowed from Shakespeare that borrowed from the Greeks that borrowed from...)

____

Mathos, the only question I have at this point--you put 'woman' in quotes above? Are you speaking of something other than broadly defined heterosexuality?

Spendius,

I predict that your battles with Mathos will leave among the most valuable gems and fallout of knowledge we have available on these boards relevant to the areas we are examining.

Diamonds are produced by incredible force and pressure.

Gentlemen, it is a sweet education to watch you spar. Sharpen your swords on one another, so when the time comes you shall run the Real Enemy through, cleanly.

Mathos:-

Under no circumstances whatsover if I may be excused for using tautology for emphasis.

I'm sorry you think I am that kind of person. I don't think I am racist against my own ppl - I support my people and the gov of china and if I had the money, I would sponser as many children as possible in the poorer country areas of china. It's just that I don't think chinese men suit me and its not because I am racists or have dismissed them based on surface knowledge but because of who I am - a chinese girl raised in a western culture so very very different from the chinese culture. Chinese men have very traditional beliefs (thank you confuscious) and even those who don't hold such beliefs - their families would. You may have heard that some chinese families take male offspring very seriously - and some families blame the woman for this "fault" if a daughter is their first born. But western families wouldn't mind, so long as its their own. I don't think that I - or any self respecting woman - could live in such a situation.

I don't believe I am being racist by think along these lines. Even my mother has said that I would not be suited for a chinese family, unless they were also had spent most of their lives in western socities.

Is that more acceptable? Maybe I put my first post in some rather inappropriate language without thinking about other ppl's reactions. :wink:

Maybe you simply shouldn't let others define your beliefs for you, Pragmatic. I for one understood what you meant right away, and see nothing in the least wrong with your attitude.

pragmatic:-

You should have turned left at the fountain and followed the one way to the top of the hill and then asked.

Sorry...don't quite understand that..

Thank you, you have made me feel better right away.

Pragmatic,

Agreed, it appears what folks are saying in a way, or at least what I'll say, is to go with what you are feeling. And go strong. Its fine. And great, as a matter of fact. If anything, take to your trip with even more energy and gusto. You may get to the top of a hill one day on your path, and rocket to another path...or not--either is actually fine. I hear you loud and clear. I've seen how asian cultures can treat their daughters and wives--sometimes. If I was an asian female, I have no doubt I may feel as you--for the psych & society reasons. Go. And there's nothing wrong with pursuing your particular path with a energetic vengeance--...

Sheer class.

I know you, Is that an insult or a compliment?

With Shakespearean characters, things may never quite be what they appear. Especially when they utter words to some effect...

First of all. I applaud Pragmatic for sifting thru this thread and responding to my buried post of two days ago.

Second, I wonder how quickly you folk would applaud and encourage this young woman if she were White and wanted nothing to do with men of her own race? If she were into Black men or Asian men or Hispanic men or any kind of man but a White man.

Third, Pragmatic, I don't think you are intentionally racist at all. I've known several young women in your same shoes throuout the years. It's an old, old story. Ever see the movie "Imitation of Life"? Wouldn't hurt you to rent that. I do think that you need to reevaluate where your head is at and why you think the way you do. Don't buy the hype that White is right, the only way to go and everything else is inferior. There's someone out here for you, Asian, White, Black, who knows, but do not dismiss your own men based on...what? The men you've met thus far? I've read on other threads that you are young and inexperienced, a virgin in every way. These are your own words. Do not close yourself off to your own people. That's simply not fair to you.

Thanks- I actually had to take a few days to study and A2K is so addictive...but I got there.



Not nothing to do with men my own race - I collaborate with chinese students, both guys and gals when we talk about issues of China and China's relations with the rest of the world. I merely say that I would prefer not to marry one, if he was as conservative as my other post had explained. Otherwise - if he was similar to my thinking, as well as being nice, honest kind and intelligent (and isn't that what all women want?), I would certainly want to become friends with him, at least.

I wish to take this opportunity to thank EOE for her assumption of racist motivation on my part. Charmed, i'm sure . . .

Ditto what what Setanta said.

I do not care which race she dates. I want her to be happy and follow her own path.

If for some reason she just loves Kenyan or Brazilian or whateverrrrrr type of men...more power to her.

She should not feel guilty for not wanting to be put in a box not of her own making.

We are encouraging her to follow what she feels in her heart. If you want to argue her, debate her into dating men she really doesn't prefer, be my guest...

Oh stop it Setanta. I never called you a racist and never would but let's face it. This is one of those touchy situations that you simply would not understand on the surface. But if you allowed your imagination to wander, maybe attempted to put yourself in the shoes of a person of color, perhaps you will understand, a little, where I'm coming from.

By the way Pragmatic, I did add some to the above response. Please read.

thank you for your post - and I know you mean well and you are giving me some good advice. I will keep what you say in mind.

Could you tell me abit about the movie? If you recommended it to me when we are talking about this, it must be very interesting. I am curious.

Hmmm...

have to incorporate this into my existential learnings...with a one eyed green monster!

Well, it's a cornball movie, that's for sure, and the focus is on an actress, played by Lana Turner, and her life, but the subplot, which is much more interesting and what most people remember, is about this woman's Black maid and the turmoil between the maid and her daughter, who is fair-skinned, and aches to be White. She chooses to 'pass', live her life as a White woman, dates only White men and turns her back on her Black mother. The ending is considered one of the saddest and most heartwrenching moments in movies.

Sometimes if a person prefers red wine, its simply their preference.